inspiration: stacey's last entry
i can't stop thinking... i think to the point where i either get a headache, or just start crying and then can't stop. i actually had to pull over the other day because i was crying so hard... truthfully, i dont even know why. i have my speculations, but i like to think that it doesn't involve just that.
random thought: friends are split into 2 catagories... people i will try my hardest to keep in touch with and hope to be friends with for as long as possible AND people that i talk to and love but in my heart i know i wont be friends with them forever. this two views, which should be on opposite sides of the spectrum, keep getting closer and more blurred as my friendships continue. i dont know if its me, or if its just the maturing process that happens in all relationships. i dont even know if this makes sense, but im so fucking confused right now i figured this would be a good outlet.
i look back 2-3 entries or so and read how happy i was at the moment, and how everything in my life was going great and heading in a good direction. but take this moment in time for instance... right now im angry, upset, confused... and i can't put a finger on why.
there isn't even anything in my life that is terrible or horrible that should be causing this. so sympathy isn't expected, so i dont expect any sympathetic replies (thanks to those who were considering though). i guess alot of it has to do with my stubborness, bitchiness, and everything else that goes with being a teenage girl. so to everyone: sorry for anything i've done. i dont want to lose you as a friend. i dont want you on the other side of the spectrum. that is all.
sorry for the long, pointless babbling. i feel better.
random thought: friends are split into 2 catagories... people i will try my hardest to keep in touch with and hope to be friends with for as long as possible AND people that i talk to and love but in my heart i know i wont be friends with them forever. this two views, which should be on opposite sides of the spectrum, keep getting closer and more blurred as my friendships continue. i dont know if its me, or if its just the maturing process that happens in all relationships. i dont even know if this makes sense, but im so fucking confused right now i figured this would be a good outlet.
i look back 2-3 entries or so and read how happy i was at the moment, and how everything in my life was going great and heading in a good direction. but take this moment in time for instance... right now im angry, upset, confused... and i can't put a finger on why.
there isn't even anything in my life that is terrible or horrible that should be causing this. so sympathy isn't expected, so i dont expect any sympathetic replies (thanks to those who were considering though). i guess alot of it has to do with my stubborness, bitchiness, and everything else that goes with being a teenage girl. so to everyone: sorry for anything i've done. i dont want to lose you as a friend. i dont want you on the other side of the spectrum. that is all.
sorry for the long, pointless babbling. i feel better.