Catholic priest's advice to a fourteen-year-old girl

[chilipeppasbaby]

My character is a fourteen-year-old girl who migrated to Australia with her family from Singapore when she was six. Her family were Hindus way back when, but have been Catholic for generations. She attends a Catholic girls' high school, where she is bullied by other girls for being what they consider overly religious: volunteering to sing a hymn

Comments

[maccaj]

It depends very much on the priest.

If he's an older man, he would be much more likely to quote scripture (the beatitudes, most likely) than a younger one (say younger than 40 - young enough to have attended seminary post Vatican II, assuming your story is present day). A younger priest would be more likely to use the opportunity to function as a counselor first - "How do you think you could better deal with your anger? Why do you think they bully you?" and *then* perhaps remind her that Jesus, too, was bullied (as were the disciples and the early church leaders, not to mention most of the saints, etc... pick a holy person, they were pretty much all given a hard time, and we Catholics love our martyrs!). A particularly astute younger priest might also tell anecdotes from his own life - what he had to give up to attend seminary, his own personal struggles, etc.

There is some crossover - not all older priests quote scripture and consider that a job well done, and not all younger priests are good at counseling or relating personal anecdotes to a person's problem - but in general it is a fairly stark pre/post-VII divide, in my experience.

If she's been confirmed and/or has a patron saint at this point (confirmation happens at 14/15 here, not sure about Australia, but if she has a middle name, she may already have one patron), the priest might well remind her of her specific patron's trials.

Nearly all priests would finish the session by giving her a blessing, telling her that anger is an emotion, not a sin, and by asking her to pray for herself, her family, and her tormentors (a younger priest will be more likely to say "pray for" them and leave the method to her, an older one would be more likely to assign X Our Fathers and Y Hail Marys, or Z decades of the rosary). A particularly *humble* priest, young or old, will also ask her to pray for him (that he may continue to know how to be most helpful in her situation and for the parish as a whole).

[shadefell]

This sounds really, really spot on.

[penhaligonblue]

This is all spot-on, with the tiny exception of this: anger is an emotion, not a sin. Actually, ira, which some translate as "anger" and others as "wrath" (i.e. severe anger), is indeed a deadly sin. Only a real fire-and-brimstoner would chide a schoolgirl for simple bitterness, though.

[penhaligonblue]

I should clarify that, even if anger is a sin according to Catholic dogma, it's totally plausible for a priest to say the opposite. Catholics tend to be loose with such matters.

[maccaj]

lol. Yes, you're right... the conflict between dogma vs the likeliest *actual* scenario is why I didn't bring up ira (given that this is a younger priest and that the penitent is only 14)... but I'm glad you noted it, because it might well be relevant to someone else.

My favorite priest *ever* once threw someone out for confessing repeatedly to what amounted to ira with no sign of remorse (the penitent in question told me, not the priest).