Good luck in finding this journal...
I enjoyed the conversation I had with you the other night…Good luck in finding this journal. How did everything start? Maybe it started with that desire to love and be loved. Well it started with Jam. It was her telling me about this guy that she said she thinks I’ll really get along with. Telling me how funny and intelligent the person is. Well she sent me pictures with you in it so I saw you already before we actually met. Then we had a chance to talk. It was a short conversation I can’t really remember what about but I guess that created more interest in meeting you. Then we met, from that time I knew we would get along and I just had that feeling or that attraction towards you. Maybe because you were really funny and I could sense that weirdness. I guess I felt that we just had something in common. Well it’s a common connection that I would often get with people of the same sign. (Libra) The only difference is attraction. Now I am growing fonder of you but I know I should keep that distance because as much as I want to just temp you and steal you away I just couldn’t. I don’t want to hurt anyone and I don’t want to hurt myself. I know I’m a risk taker when it comes to what my heart feels but this time I will use my head. Thank you for all the flattery and for the many times you make me smile. I sometimes find it difficult talking with you because I can’t look you in the eye. I’m scared that you will just see through me. Our conversation made it more difficult for me to suppress what I feel because I guess it’s the common things or the type of person that you are that makes me like you more. Your openness of who you are makes you that very likeable person. You are so talkative kinda like me. Our conversation just made me like you more to the extent that I already care. Probably what I feel is starting to grow maybe its just infatuation; I hope it is because I know it’s something I can get over easily. You’re actually more of the reason why I stay in the office longer than I should but of course the 45% is Jam. Another thing is I’m starting to think about you more often than I should. Like yesterday, I was actually worried with a mixed emotion hoping that you were able to fix your relationship with her because I know that you would be happy that way and at the back of my head I hoped you didn’t so maybe there’s that chance for us to get to know each other more. I know I shouldn’t get to know you more or take that attraction and try to convert it to wanting friendship. I should start calling you kuya it’s my way of creating that distance I do that to both types of men. To those I want to treat me as a friend and not see my closeness as something other than friendship and to those I like that I would have conflicts with if I became close. As much as I can I try to be a responsible person in all aspect of my life part of that is trying to not hurt anyone in the process of finding my happiness and finding that person to share it with. I wouldn’t go as far as this…I hope you’ll never find this one. I will grant you what you ask of me if you find this. Until then all this will be for those who know that my journal exists.