Closure and Forgiveness...
I saw you a few weeks back and I felt anger in my heart…I know you saw me too. I want to be able to forgive you and I want to be able to find and ask closure from you. I want to move on with life and not feel this anger. I want to be able to tell you how you made me feel and from there set myself free. I need the closure but I don’t think I can ask it now. I know it’s been months or I don’t know when ending us started. I’m not quite sure if has it been a year. I know you may not understand what I’m going through or understand how I feel but at some point I need to close the book properly not to leave it half of open or half closed. The proper farewells should be said and if there’s that need to ask for an apology to have peace then it should be done without hesitation. I will never understand the part where the person you love is the same person that killed you. The hardest part is to undo your death. Death can symbolize so many things physical death is not what it means it’s when hope was taken away from you and you walk life without hoping then your worse than dead.
I know I also need to ask forgiveness from you because each and every moment you hurt me I wanted you to feel the same pain. I know I made it difficult because it was difficult for me. I have no regrets though it ended nasty when I loved you I did without out holding back I took that leap and gave it a chance with everything I have left hoping to give it one more chance. I hope you could read everything I ever felt with you so you would understand what you took from me and why I felt so angered. I don’t know why it should matter but somehow I want you to also understand that it was all real to me and that it was never a game. I didn’t have you to pacify my longing or just to have someone I actually hoped and dreamed that YOU were all that I ever wanted. When was it easy to let go of someone that makes you happy you try to hold on not understanding that holding of loses them completely.
They say time will heal all wounds I hope it would and honestly your forgiveness matters to me.
I want to forgive and be forgiven and more than anything else I want peace.