Big Boys Don't Cry (gen)
Title: Big Boys Don't Cry
Author: little_artemis (AKA balthiersgirl on y!, and littleartemis everywhere else)
Rating: G
Word Count: 306
Fandom: Supernatural
Characters/Pairing: Dean Winchester
Warning: anxiety disorder, panic attacks
Summary: It was happening again.
Notes: Written after I had a major panic attack.
Disclaimer: All characters, and the world belong to their respective owners. I claim no rights to them, and make no profit from this fan work.
It was happening again.
He knew it as soon as he felt his heart begin to race.
It was always when no one was around. No one to comfort him and tell him it was going to be okay. Though those words were really not the words he would want to hear. They never were. It was okay for him to say it, but he never really wanted to hear it.
Swallowing hard he rested his hands on the counter in the bathroom, staring at them as they shook.
His entire body felt like it was vibrating. Like he was a piece of metal that had been struck and there was a never ending pulse inside him. Shaking with the rhythm of his rapidly beating heart.
Then there was his breath;
it felt like the air was being choked out of him.
Like the room was closing in on him, and he could not breath.
He kept trying to take deep long breaths. Somewhere he had read that this would help.
That it would calm him.
But no luck.
Closing his eyes he could feel the tears coming and he hoped to god Sam would not walk in that door and see him like this.
He was not supposed to see him cry.
Big, strong Dean was not a crier. He was not an emotional person. Chick flick moments were never a part of his routine.
It was why he did this alone. In private where no one could see him.
See him fall against the wall in the bathroom and slowly slide down, knees pulled to his chest as he covered his face with his hands.
Silently crying like he had practiced how to.
Big boys didn’t cry.
And if no one saw, no one knew.
No one knew that Dean Winchester was practically broken.
Author: little_artemis (AKA balthiersgirl on y!, and littleartemis everywhere else)
Rating: G
Word Count: 306
Fandom: Supernatural
Characters/Pairing: Dean Winchester
Warning: anxiety disorder, panic attacks
Summary: It was happening again.
Notes: Written after I had a major panic attack.
Disclaimer: All characters, and the world belong to their respective owners. I claim no rights to them, and make no profit from this fan work.
It was happening again.
He knew it as soon as he felt his heart begin to race.
It was always when no one was around. No one to comfort him and tell him it was going to be okay. Though those words were really not the words he would want to hear. They never were. It was okay for him to say it, but he never really wanted to hear it.
Swallowing hard he rested his hands on the counter in the bathroom, staring at them as they shook.
His entire body felt like it was vibrating. Like he was a piece of metal that had been struck and there was a never ending pulse inside him. Shaking with the rhythm of his rapidly beating heart.
Then there was his breath;
it felt like the air was being choked out of him.
Like the room was closing in on him, and he could not breath.
He kept trying to take deep long breaths. Somewhere he had read that this would help.
That it would calm him.
But no luck.
Closing his eyes he could feel the tears coming and he hoped to god Sam would not walk in that door and see him like this.
He was not supposed to see him cry.
Big, strong Dean was not a crier. He was not an emotional person. Chick flick moments were never a part of his routine.
It was why he did this alone. In private where no one could see him.
See him fall against the wall in the bathroom and slowly slide down, knees pulled to his chest as he covered his face with his hands.
Silently crying like he had practiced how to.
Big boys didn’t cry.
And if no one saw, no one knew.
No one knew that Dean Winchester was practically broken.