And one you're saving for a rainy day.
My History Prof came in to class the other day and asked us all how we'd feel if he were to just wipe our last paper off the syllabus, and redistribute the marks over everything else we've done. This motion passed unanimously. This means I only have two papers -- three, if you count my assessment response -- and my final exams to worry about until I'm done the semester. I am convienently ignoring the fact that the semester only contains a week and a half. History Prof is currently topping my I LOVE YOU LIST.
There's good news regarding graduation, classes for next semester, and academic life in general too. I bothered my advisor, and it turns out that since I took summer classes, and since I totally misread the results of my grad audit (which resulted in an unecessary panic attack or two on my part), I am in absolutely no danger of not graduating in April. Even better is that I'm going to have a super-light semester. I'm only taking thirteen credit hours, three of which are a lower level math class that I'm only taking because having that on my CV means I can teach middle school as well as high school. This was suggested to me by my advisior, and figured why the hell not. No harm in keeping my options open. Biggest thing though? I'm guaranteed to walk the stage this April, which is fabulous. PERCY O'LEARY BA, BITCHES.
I ended up finishing that application for the Professional Program that I was freaking out about a little while ago the day it was due. Not sure it's my greatest work, but I think I was as honest and genuine as the format allowed. I also managed to talk a couple professors in to vouching for me. Dr. Crazy, that absolutely insane and wonderful English prof who I've taken classes with since second year, offered to speak to my character. Dr. Canadiana, another English professor who specializes in Can Lit (though you may know him better as the Prof I walked in on reading 'Twilight') is going to say what a wonderful student I am. Bossman from the theatre is going to tell them how diligent, punctual, and whatnot I am. All that remains is for them to send in those references, and to hear from the Faculty on their decision. This will happen over Winter Break. I suppose this is a good thing. At least they're not making me wait too long to find out what they think of me. I've been coming to terms lately with the fact that I might not get in, and am making contingency plans...namely, full-time work for a year, then reapplying while in a financially comfortable position.
Next Thursday is my last day at practicum. This is really sad, actually, since I've really adored my time there. I didn't share as much of it as I thought I would with you guys, but I think it can be best summed up by saying that it was life-changing. I learned a lot about teaching; probably more than I have at any other placement that I've had. The whole experience showed me all the areas that I need to grow and change in. You would think that this would be discouraging, but it's not. Back when I was in high school, I mentioned to my history teacher that I was a little ashamed of how much I didn't know. There was just SO MUCH out there, and I knew so little of it.He told me some words that have been my mantra ever since:
"I do not think shame is called for. Just feel humble in the face of all there is to know."
And that's it right there. Despite having so much of what I need to change and improve being pointed out to me here, I'm excited to move upwards and onwards. I want to be the best teacher I can be, and these past months have brought me further along that path. It's going to be rough to leave the kids behind -- I've never connected so closely with my students before -- but it's time. All I can do is trust that I'm leaving them better people than I found them.
There's some family drama going on right now that's putting a little damper on all these fairly positive happenings though, which kind of sucks. I'm really not up for elaborating on it save to say that I really, really hope my brother is not as big an idiot as I think, and that I need to spend a little more time with my litte sister. Academic hermitude is useful for getting stuff done, but you miss some really big shit when you're busy attempting to get book-learned. If you could spare a moment of prayer, general appeal to the universe, positive thought, or whatever for my siblings and my parents, I would appreciate it in a big way. I myself am okay, but everyone else in my family is dealing with some fairly big emotional stuff that I've only been privy to for the past couple days. See what happens when I come out of the batcave for air? Le sigh.
Am currently digging Kanye West/Fall Out Boy mashups like WHOA. Muchas gracias internet.
Am going to end this entry now, as incoherence is setting in and I still have reading that I could be doing. Cheers.