Don't Save Me Ch. 3
Summary: Earth is a horrible planet, and Prowl must suffer through another difficult night
Rating: M
Warnings: child abuse, suggested sexual interest in a child
-Thinking-
-flashback-
Three months. Three months on earth. She spent three tortuous months on this disgusting, primus-forsaken, dirtball planet. The Decepticon femme hissed. Who knew the humans would have a large forest in New Jersey? Whatever they called it didn't matter. She was fairly safe, thanks to the superstition of the Jersey Devil. At that thought the femme chuckled. -If they want a devil, I'll gladly give them one.- But that would have to wait. She had hidden in a cave to hide after seeing several Decepticon jets nearby.
Her escape from the Nemesis had been too easy until Starscream had decided to fly in, just as she was leaving. The fight was brief, but she didn't get away uninjured. She had sustained damage to her hip. The wound was healing, but without energon her repair systems were taking awhile to heal the damage.
Another hiss escaped her vocalizer. If Decepticons found her in this condition there was a good chance she could be terminated. She wouldn't be able to run far but at least she could still fight. Training with Barricade had taught her to endure worse. Barricade didn't tolerate any weakness. She remembered during one sparring session, Barricade pulled off one of her arms and continued training until she shut down from energy loss.
She began to wonder how long it would take till someone found her. After making planet fall, she ran into the humans from NEST twice before she made it to Jersey. The first time happened an hour she after she made planet fall. The humans were so disorganized she was able to slip away. The second time occurred a few moments after she scanned a small ford truck so she could hide. She had to sit in her alternative mode for three hours before the humans left.
She glared at her armor in disgust. Thanks to the shape of the truck her armor wasn't dispersed evenly along her body. There was too much of it on her chest and back and made it uncomfortable. As soon as her hip was healed she would leave the forest and find a sleeker form.
She was shaken out of her musings when she heard a soft tapping like sound against the cave. The femme looked out and saw it was raining. A purr ran through her systems and her doorwings were held high as she watched the rain fall. If one thing made up for the 'insects' that populated this planet it was the rain. She then looked at the ground in disdain. It was a shame that there was one thing that ruined the rain. Mud.
- I hate this planet-
Jazz woke to the sound of hitching vents. "Prowl," Jazz whispered. He rose off the berth to find Prowl sitting on the edge with his head in his hands and his doors flat on his back. Jazz wrapped his arms around Prowl's waist in an attempt to comfort his mate.
-At least he's not screaming again.- Prowl had made improvement the last few months. He was slowly regaining his confidence and he hadn't had a flashback for two weeks now.
He still woke up at night, but now he wasn't always screaming. Some nights he would wake up crying, like tonight, some nights he was screaming and crying, but it was the times that Prowl would just lay there with a distant look in his optics that bothered Jazz the most.
"It's alright Prowler. I'm here. Tell me what happened." Ratchet had instructed Jazz to try to get Prowl to talk about the memories, but most times Prowl would look away or change the subject.
"I..he…how could I, no he.. ," Prowl muttered. Jazz heard this and was instantly concerned. He knew Prowl was having acceptance problems, but it was still disturbing to watch him go through it.
"Prowl, baby, tell me what ya saw. I only want t' help."
Prowl felt absolutely sick. His tanks were threatening to purge, his processor ached, and it felt like someone had stuck a blade in his spark as the memories he just saw were still swirling in his head.
He was in a training arena. The air was thick and musty with the stench of spilt energon and coolant. Energon was splattered all over the ground. Before him stood his youngling, her vents were working full speed as he assessed the result of the training. One optic was shattered, a sensory panel missing, the other one had deep scratches in it. Ligature wounds were on her arms and legs, and several knife wounds covered her torso.
Prowl purged his tanks. He couldn't get the sight of all the energon on the ground. Who could do that to their own child? Oh, right he did. -No! It was Barricade. Barricade did it, not me.-
Jazz heard Prowl's thought. He knew whatever Prowl saw was not something to be taken lightly. It had shaken him to the core. For a moment, Jazz was paralyzed by how much pain was pouring over the bond between him and Prowl. How long had Prowl been keeping it hidden from him?
"Prowl please. Let me help you," Jazz begged. He couldn't stand to see his bondmate like this.
"How could he do that? That was my.. his…," Prowl muttered. He felt like he was going to be sick again and the pain in his spark seemed to increase.
"Prowler, please what happened?"
"Better," he rumbled to the youngling. "It took you much longer to scream. Too bad, it was those doorwings that broke you in the end. And you couldn't lay a single scratch on me" He put a claw to his face and cocked his head as if he was thinking about something. "We'll have to work on that. Maybe Sideways would like to help. Would you like that, youngling?"
The youngling's optics flared in defiance. Oh, she knew what kind of 'help' Sideways would give her. It hadn't even been a full stellar-cycle since her upgrade, but she was adapting to her body well. In a flash she had moved across the arena and launched herself at Barricade.
He landed with a grunt as he fell on his wings. He grinned at the youngling when he felt a knife at his throat. "Much better, youngling. You are learning, perhaps Sideways won't be needed after all."
Prowl trembled. She was too young for that body upgrade in the first place, but Barricade got it and she was being turned into a monster.
"She wasn't even old enough, Jazz," he whispered. Jazz cocked his head at this. She? He was sure Prowl never mentioned a she before.
"Prowl, who's she?"
"He…I.." And using Sideways has a motivator how sick was Barricade? -You should know he was you-
"No, not true, not true," Prowl mumbled. Why wouldn't that voice just leave him alone?
Jazz frowned. Prowl was too upset to tell him anything tonight. The best he could do was comfort Prowl enough to get him back to recharge. He began to send pulses of love and reassurance over the bond and pulled Prowl into his arms. "It's okay Prowler, I've got ya. You're safe, I'm here. Just go back to sleep."
Prowl trembled in his hold as he slowly lulled him back into recharge. Jazz just stared at the ceiling of their quarters. Prowl was supposedly talking to Ratchet about his experiences, though not much talking was being done. But he had told Jazz about a few things Barricade had done. Most of it was interrogation, assassination, and scout work.
But it never occurred to Jazz just how much Prowl didn't tell him. He knew Prowl hadn't told him everything. He knew Prowl would probably never tell him everything, but he couldn't stop the ache in his chest that came with knowing that Prowl still had so much pain and he was hiding it away from him.
He wanted Prowl to heal. He wanted to see Prowl be happy again. Why couldn't Prowl just see he'd do anything to help him? That as long as he had this second chance at life he would never let anything like this happen to Prowl again?
Jazz looked down at his mate as he lay resting in his arms and thought, -How much is he not telling me? How much do I not know?-