Shadows and Siege 8

[lit_gal]

Shadows and Siege Part 8
Sequel to Shadows of the Past
Fandoms: Primary: Sentinel.  Secondary: La Femme Nikita, Stargate SG-1
Slash, Rated: ADULT

Shadows and Siege part one
Shadows and Siege part two
Shadows and Siege part three
Shadows and Siege part four

Shadows and Siege part five
Shadows and Siege part six
Shadows and Siege part seven

"This is… this is so

Comments

Shadows And Siege 8

[slashpuppy]

You were right. Nobody is as happy as I am about SG-1 meeting Blair and Jim. *does happy dance*

Come on, *Blair* going toe to toe with Jack over Jack's reaction to/dismissal of Jim and his talents? If there's anyone Blair would fight for, it's Jim. I love it! :-)

God this story is captivating. As soon as I finish the newest bit I still want *more*! Eagerly looking forward to the next chapter.

Wee fixes:
- For a half-second, Jim thought [For a half second Jim thought]
- Jim found it frightening simple [frighteningly]
- Our taxdollars are actually [tax dollars]
- Pigpen in the comics strip [comic]? comics just sounds wrong

I'm not sure what this bit is trying to say. I'm not sure who all the 'he's might be referring to.
Jim hadn't been joking when he suggested that Blair might do a table leg because as horny as he was all the time, he might have in the absence of a better partner.

- what he wanted in the short time [short term]
- and it still wasn't that simple [still] Reading this out loud I found I was putting this emphasis on 'still' so you might think about providing the emphasis yourself
- I don't think they're the shoot-first type ['shoot first']
- even if they are the shoot-first sort ['shoot first']
- had weapons trained at them [trained on them]
- And the zats are just Egyptian stelae, I suppose. [suppose?] he is asking a question even if he is being sarcastic about it!

Jim was half sitting on the arm of the couch. But you say...
Eventually O'Neill made eye contact, and Jim stood a little straighter as the man evaluated his options.
But Jim's wasn't standing so he can't 'stand' a little straighter. I think he either has to get to his feet or 'sit' a little straighter.

- Teal'c eyebrow rose [Teal'c's]
- put himself between the two me. [two men.]
- I don't have authority [the authority]
- identify and eliminated the goa'uld [eliminate]
- I'm not letting snakehead set up shop [snakeheads]
- not interrupting a commanding officer obviously didn't even exist either [didn't exist] I don't think you need the word 'even' in here, sounds awkward when reading it out loud
- Blair said dryly as rolled his eyes. [as he]
- O'Neill gesture toward Teal'c [gestured]
- calling for MP's to come collect them [MPs] ?
- I'm sure you won't mind if I sent Teal'c along to check on that. [you either need to use 'won't' and 'send' or 'wouldn't' and 'sent'] and is this actually a question requiring a question mark even if it is a rhetorical question because Jack doesn't give a toss even if they do mind!
- he reached out grabbed Blair's arm [out and]
- Jim didn't like the idea of the next thirty years with Blair [of spending] ?

Re: Shadows And Siege 8

[lit_gal]

Blair is totally going to fight for Jim... that's what he does. And Jack can come off as rather dismissive/disrespectful, especially if you don't know him. Blair would be totally cool with Jack disrespecting him, and might even expect it because Blair isn't one of the chest-pounding alpha males. However, Jack going after Jim is so not okay with him.

And wow. Okay, I"m officially embarrassed. That's bad. I can't believe the number of mistakes I made. *cringes*

Re: Shadows And Siege 8

[slashpuppy]

*thwaps you* Stop cringing!

You delivered a taut, nicely balanced chapter with standing-up-for-his-buddy!Blair, with dismissive!Jack, and great dialogue and I'm reasonably certain that Blair made Teal'c scream with laughter. I mean, we *all* saw that eyebrow twitch! And Danny kept having to choke down laughter at something Blair said. And Jack did at least once too.

AND, I got to nitpick! *is happy* :-)

Re: Shadows And Siege 8

[lit_gal]

Do you think I could convince people that I put those things in there on purpose just to give you a chance to nitpick to your heart's content??

And I'm very glad that you're enjoying the interactions.

Re: Shadows And Siege 8

[slashpuppy]

Re-reading cos there's a new chapter.

Wee fix:
and the feel a Goa'uld larva this close [feel of a]