I'll never judge you, I can only love you.
→ New Years weekend, I'm still writing about it. TL;DR VERSION: I went out with Jason to some super-expensive party that was supposed to have contortionists and fire-throwers (I saw neither). There was tons of disorganization and drama with it, I was furious that we paid 220-fucking-dollars to go to there. So he went and yelled at them and they said they'd give us our money back. We stayed and by the time I finally got up to the bar, I ordered a shit ton of straight tequila on the rocks just because I was so irritated and wanted to take advantage of their open bar lol. Matt and Kiel both pissed me off with texts, and when midnight struck, I asked Jason if I could kiss him. We made out on a huge seashell and he didn't suck at it. Then I had a tantrum and started crying about how I was scared that I just ruined everything. We stayed at the party until close, and then took ages getting home - he helped some guy fix his tire, we went to get pizza but got bitched out by a cop, we realized I lost his glasses so we went back for them, went to McDonald's, etc, I am telling you, there is a lot to say lol. And then we made out again, on my living room floor. Now I have carpet burn up my spine and whisker burn on my face and I'm just confused as shit. Because it turns out it wasn't even a one-time drunk thing, he came over on Saturday night for Chinese food and a mini-Duchovs marathon, and we ended up fucking around off-and-on for like 8 hours and I had more issues but I also had fun and I wanted it and I DON'T FUCKING KNOW MY LIFE ANYMORE. But he is so nice and says such amazing things and is so attentive, AND he's so confident and aggressive in bed that it blows my mind and confuses me even more because I never expected him to be like that and kljwfdjkas. And god, one of the hottest moments of my life happened when I told him to say something smart and he started talking physics while he was on top of me. I can't even. WHAT THE FUCK, THIS IS MY BEST FRIEND. If I lose that, I will just die, he is the only person here IRL who is unfailingly there for me no matter what. So, yeah. Anyway. My tardiness regarding a New Year's entry in general is largely due to said confusion and my inability to write about it in decent time purely because of the volume of detail. I hope you all had a beautiful New Year, though! I know I didn't get to say it on time, but really, I hope it was great and that your 2011 will be beyond fucking breathtaking. 2010 was such an amazing, pivotal year for me - I regard it as the year my life began to crack open. I may do a more in-depth retrospective later, but I met some amazing creative and encouraging people, breathed passions even more deeply than I did before, and did things I'd always only ever dreamed of doing. I'm sad to see it go but I know this is only the beginning.
→ Monday, Ali and I went to a bar with some girlfriends from middle school for pop culture trivia - us, Emily, Sara, and their friend David. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN, OH MY GOD! I was so glad that we all got along still, I haven't seen them in years but we laughed SO much and it was just a blast. LOL - "You guys remember Vince? YEAH, he made out with a 52 year old." oh my god it was amazing. AND I LOVE TRIVIA. I'm so pissed I didn't know about it sooner! ANYWAY, WE TOTALLY DOMINATED, WE LEGIT WON. It was a huge deal because Em & Sara go with friends every week and have never won. We got $100 and it paid for our tab and then some and it was such a fun, free night. lol our team name was ~Catholic Chaos~ because we all went to a Catholic school, lmao. TOTALLY GOING BACK ON MONDAY FOR MOAR MONIES. Golden Globe category was so mine. I HOPE THERE IS SOMETHING SIMILAR NEXT WEEK. Because let's face it, I contribute absolutely nothing to Sports lol.
→ Last night, (lol, tonight, I haven't gone to bed duh) a few of my dance team friends from high school and I had a fiesta night, Spanish music and enchiladas and margaritas, oh my! It was another huge blast, I really love those girls. The food was amazing and we just laughed and talked about sex and it was such a girl-sesh and I live for that shit. We turned the fireplace on and kept our blender full of margaritas in the snow just outside the ground-level window. ♥ ♥ It was so cozy. We played some game called Smart Ass, with like, little donkeys and trivia questions, lmao. THEN WE MADE DRINKS OF ICE CREAM AND KALUHA and had another tub of caramel-laced ice cream sitting in the middle of the table that we all just ate straight out of with spoons. I love them I love them. Sisters, I have several. ♥ ♥ ♥ LOL!moment - "I know they lost their v-cards to each other so maybe that's why they're so weird. They think they're ~soulmates~." / "OH WHATEVER, I've taken like three guys' v-cards and they aren't any fuckin' soulmates," says Ali. I died. LOOK AT ALL OF THIS MATERIAL I'M GETTING FOR MY FUTURE FILMS.
→ I came home, tried to edit but couldn't, so I called Jason and we ended up having a spelling bee over the phone and quizzing each other on phobias. /nerd. THEN I MADE CHICKEN AND FRENCH FRIES AND CUDDLED IN MY BED WITH MY CHRISTMAS LIGHTS AND WATCHED LIVE TO DANCE AND I DON'T EVEN GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU SAY, I AM SO IN LOVE WITH PAULA ABDUL IT IS RIDICULOUS. I LOVE HER SO MUCH. I NEED TO HUG HER AGAIN SHE MAKES ME SO HAPPY AND SHE IS SO PRETTY AND TINY AND GENUINE (TO ME. INSPIRING. PASSIONATE. ETC.) AND I MISS DANCE AND I LOVE HER AND I LOVE EVERYTHING. I JUST HATE THAT IT'S ON CBS LMAO. I HATE THAT NETWORK, IT IS MY LEAST FAVORITE NETWORK. But okay, FUCK THE NETWORK, CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT HER HAIR?! AND HER FACE?! I HAVE STUFF TO SAY ABOUT THE DANCES TOO, I SWEAR, BUT LIKE, I JUST MISS HER TOO MUCH TO CARE RN. (the really really old couple and the 10 year old 'dating' ballroom couple, omfg. AND the huge group of zombies to the MJ song - omg. Other than that, I'm kind of... meh. ALSO, SIDE NOTE, I HATE THE EDITING ON THIS SHOW. THEY REPEATED LIKE A MILLION THINGS AND WASTED SO MANY MONTAGE-TIMING OPPORTUNITIES. DIE.) no but really though, Paula SHINES LIKE MY OWN PERSONAL STAR.
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OKAY, bed. PCA's tomorrow! We're having a discussion post on house_cuddy so stop on by!
→ Monday, Ali and I went to a bar with some girlfriends from middle school for pop culture trivia - us, Emily, Sara, and their friend David. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN, OH MY GOD! I was so glad that we all got along still, I haven't seen them in years but we laughed SO much and it was just a blast. LOL - "You guys remember Vince? YEAH, he made out with a 52 year old." oh my god it was amazing. AND I LOVE TRIVIA. I'm so pissed I didn't know about it sooner! ANYWAY, WE TOTALLY DOMINATED, WE LEGIT WON. It was a huge deal because Em & Sara go with friends every week and have never won. We got $100 and it paid for our tab and then some and it was such a fun, free night. lol our team name was ~Catholic Chaos~ because we all went to a Catholic school, lmao. TOTALLY GOING BACK ON MONDAY FOR MOAR MONIES. Golden Globe category was so mine. I HOPE THERE IS SOMETHING SIMILAR NEXT WEEK. Because let's face it, I contribute absolutely nothing to Sports lol.
→ Last night, (lol, tonight, I haven't gone to bed duh) a few of my dance team friends from high school and I had a fiesta night, Spanish music and enchiladas and margaritas, oh my! It was another huge blast, I really love those girls. The food was amazing and we just laughed and talked about sex and it was such a girl-sesh and I live for that shit. We turned the fireplace on and kept our blender full of margaritas in the snow just outside the ground-level window. ♥ ♥ It was so cozy. We played some game called Smart Ass, with like, little donkeys and trivia questions, lmao. THEN WE MADE DRINKS OF ICE CREAM AND KALUHA and had another tub of caramel-laced ice cream sitting in the middle of the table that we all just ate straight out of with spoons. I love them I love them. Sisters, I have several. ♥ ♥ ♥ LOL!moment - "I know they lost their v-cards to each other so maybe that's why they're so weird. They think they're ~soulmates~." / "OH WHATEVER, I've taken like three guys' v-cards and they aren't any fuckin' soulmates," says Ali. I died. LOOK AT ALL OF THIS MATERIAL I'M GETTING FOR MY FUTURE FILMS.
→ I came home, tried to edit but couldn't, so I called Jason and we ended up having a spelling bee over the phone and quizzing each other on phobias. /nerd. THEN I MADE CHICKEN AND FRENCH FRIES AND CUDDLED IN MY BED WITH MY CHRISTMAS LIGHTS AND WATCHED LIVE TO DANCE AND I DON'T EVEN GIVE A FUCK WHAT YOU SAY, I AM SO IN LOVE WITH PAULA ABDUL IT IS RIDICULOUS. I LOVE HER SO MUCH. I NEED TO HUG HER AGAIN SHE MAKES ME SO HAPPY AND SHE IS SO PRETTY AND TINY AND GENUINE (TO ME. INSPIRING. PASSIONATE. ETC.) AND I MISS DANCE AND I LOVE HER AND I LOVE EVERYTHING. I JUST HATE THAT IT'S ON CBS LMAO. I HATE THAT NETWORK, IT IS MY LEAST FAVORITE NETWORK. But okay, FUCK THE NETWORK, CAN WE JUST TALK ABOUT HER HAIR?! AND HER FACE?! I HAVE STUFF TO SAY ABOUT THE DANCES TOO, I SWEAR, BUT LIKE, I JUST MISS HER TOO MUCH TO CARE RN. (the really really old couple and the 10 year old 'dating' ballroom couple, omfg. AND the huge group of zombies to the MJ song - omg. Other than that, I'm kind of... meh. ALSO, SIDE NOTE, I HATE THE EDITING ON THIS SHOW. THEY REPEATED LIKE A MILLION THINGS AND WASTED SO MANY MONTAGE-TIMING OPPORTUNITIES. DIE.) no but really though, Paula SHINES LIKE MY OWN PERSONAL STAR.
★
OKAY, bed. PCA's tomorrow! We're having a discussion post on house_cuddy so stop on by!