shopping carts.
When my mother and I went to Home Depot the other day, I sat in the shopping cart. I was wearing a red dress, shades, and my hair up in a flop on the top of my head. It wasn't just for the hell of it - my right ankle is still swollen from the drunken fall, and my left foot had a blister on the ball of it; I didn't much fancy walking through aisles of paint and wood. So she pushed me around. People made comments ("LOL, Isn't she a little big?", "*points* You got such a great deal!") but it was all in fun - smiles and good spirits. We went down to the lumber section, not because we needed wood, but because we just love how it smells. And glue, we went down the glue aisle too, we love the smell of this one particular kind so much that it was probably borderline huffing, but no damage was done and no high was gained, save for the natural high you get just from smelling something pleasing. We went outside to look at the flowers and plants, and she pushed me under the sun. I love that this didn't bother her. I love that she didn't just scoff and say, "PSHT, you're 21." In fact, it was her idea. Just so my feet wouldn't hurt.
We went to check out and I got out to stand on the bar on the back. She pushed me down the way, my dress freely blowing now, when some saleswoman said, "Hey guys," to us as we passed her counter. I thought it was just another one of her former coworkers, but it wasn't. "That's not very safe," she says, patronizing as shit. I understand the adage, 'If you're going to act like a child, you're going to get treated like one', I do, so that's not what bothered me the most. What bothered me the most was what followed - "It's a bad example to set for children", in a tone that reeked of 'TSK TSK'. That is what bothered me. I really love kids. I do. It's probably one of the biggest misconceptions about me. But I didn't go to Home Depot to be a role model. I am purposely NOT a mother because I DON'T want to have to watch every. single. step. I make right now. And it's not my job to parent other people's kids. If it were me, and I was shopping with my child, and she saw someone being pushed on a cart, it is MY JOB to say no to her if I don't want HER on carts. I saw PLENTY of things as a child that I wanted to do - "bad examples" being set by other people, adults - but my parents had enough balls to make the call or say it was wrong or whatever. And what I was doing was hardly even damaging, anyway. I'm not beating the shit out of anybody, I'm not cursing at the top of my voice, I'm not stealing. I know most people probably wouldn't get upset at what she said, they probably wouldn't even think twice, but I was irrationally bothered (I *was* PMSing but I suspect I'd still take issue with this).
My mother's response, though? "We are children." We turned a corner and she told me to get back on. ♥ ♥
We went to check out and I got out to stand on the bar on the back. She pushed me down the way, my dress freely blowing now, when some saleswoman said, "Hey guys," to us as we passed her counter. I thought it was just another one of her former coworkers, but it wasn't. "That's not very safe," she says, patronizing as shit. I understand the adage, 'If you're going to act like a child, you're going to get treated like one', I do, so that's not what bothered me the most. What bothered me the most was what followed - "It's a bad example to set for children", in a tone that reeked of 'TSK TSK'. That is what bothered me. I really love kids. I do. It's probably one of the biggest misconceptions about me. But I didn't go to Home Depot to be a role model. I am purposely NOT a mother because I DON'T want to have to watch every. single. step. I make right now. And it's not my job to parent other people's kids. If it were me, and I was shopping with my child, and she saw someone being pushed on a cart, it is MY JOB to say no to her if I don't want HER on carts. I saw PLENTY of things as a child that I wanted to do - "bad examples" being set by other people, adults - but my parents had enough balls to make the call or say it was wrong or whatever. And what I was doing was hardly even damaging, anyway. I'm not beating the shit out of anybody, I'm not cursing at the top of my voice, I'm not stealing. I know most people probably wouldn't get upset at what she said, they probably wouldn't even think twice, but I was irrationally bothered (I *was* PMSing but I suspect I'd still take issue with this).
My mother's response, though? "We are children." We turned a corner and she told me to get back on. ♥ ♥