This is going to sound really, really stupid probably, but have this little corner on my wall and it's really sentimental because it's got... like, fucking a I feel so strange talking about this. But it's got this light lavender paper that says "believe" on it and I put a picture of Paula Abdul from March 16 on it and rhinestoned it, so that's hanging there, and then next to it, I have my Paula necklace, the big gold heart one with her handwriting that talks about loving yourself. And then earlier in the summer, I found this gorgeously expensive lavender purple swarovski crystal star (wow that is a lot of adjectives) but I bought it anyway because I thought of her instantly and it was one of the most sentimental things I think I've ever seen. And I knew I wanted it in this little Paula corner. Well, I just hung it up over there. And then I took my keys to the dance studio and put them on my keychain from Sara with a purple butterfly that says "believe, imagine, dream" on it, and I put a tack in the wall by all that stuff so I could hang my keys there. And I was looking at this stuff and my keys and thinking that maybe I'd also like to do a solo this year for Paula, as stupid as that sounds. Because I would not have those keys without her. And I'd like to tell her all of that, and all of me, and the only way I can think to do that is through dance even though she won't see it. I'll still be able to say it.
I wanted to do one of her songs but I don't feel like doing a jazz solo so I think I'm going to do Moon River because it was her first ballet recital. And it'd be my first solo. It'd just mean a lot. So I'm looking on iTunes and I see that Judy Garland covered it and it makes me cry. I don't even know what version I want, there are so many here. I don't know if I'll have the time or the choreography, but right now I have the desire, and I'd like to write that down. I probably won't end up doing it because I am so lazy, but I just wanted to throw it out there
. Moon River, wider than a mile,
I’m crossing you in style someday.
Oh dream maker, you heart breaker,
Wherever you’re goin’, I’m goin’ your way,
Two drifters, off to see the world,
There’s such a lot of world to see,
We’re after the same rainbow's end