Some Thoughts on Elven Sanitation
It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to wonder about it ... This subject is not for the squeamish!
Thank you to Cal for betaing.
‘On Elven Sanitation’ or ‘The Joys of Indoor Plumbing’
Introduction:
I’m sure The Last Homely House had running water, indoor WC and bathrooms - these clever Noldor did so like to invent things - but how do you ( Read more... )
I actually had not imagined that, but somehow it appeals to me. She has a tendency in most stories to get treated with far too much reverence.
I actually think a lot about bathrooms in my fics. Although I do not write them, I have to have them in my head. No problem with the Noldor. Anyone who can make the kinds of things they made can surely manage plumbing, even on short notice and under adverse circumstances, that could put the Romans to shame. But then tend to be such builders, that I am rarely dealing with them in a rural setting. Even on Lake Mithrim, I have them rapidly turning a camp into a small city. I had not considered the problem for the wood-elf, Galadron population. Interesting concepts.
My elves bath a lot in my fics, because I think they are human, with minor genetic variations which lead to cells continuing to reproduce indefinitely, but no real dramatic differences in the sex act, birthing or process of waste elimination. And, therefore, I also consider their body odors would be similar to a very healthy, young Mortal. Yes, their shit would stink (more or less depending upon what they were eating). It wouldn't be a stretch for me to imagine it the digestive process working perfectly, so, that could make a difference in degree as well.
Reply
As to Elves bathing on the road, I, too think that they would whenever possible. With their appreciation of beauty and their higher resistance to cold, there were good reasons for them to do it. But I suppose one also has to consider the risk involved; it wouldn't do to be surprised by a band of orcs while wearing nothing but a lather ... a most embarassing way to end your days.
Oh - and I'm glad that you're not shocked by the Galadriel-image; actually, none have complained about it so far (to my surprise).
Reply
it wouldn't do to be surprised by a band of orcs while wearing nothing but a lather...a most embarrassing way to end your days.
If Elves could smell Mortal's, I'm sure they could smell and sense the proximity of orcs, even upwind XD .
Battle the orcs, then have a bath 8D
Reply
Battle the orcs, then have a bath 8D
lol - yes, that would be the proper way to go about it! The Elves would need a bath afterwards, anyway.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Beautiful villas and mansions are no good without a waste disposal system. Can you imagine finishing something the size of Windsor Castle and having that; " I * know * we forgot something ..." moment. O_o
Reply
Did I ever tell, I've seen Knossos? Didn't see any bathrooms, though. *g*
We visited Crete 10 years ago and there was a bus trip to the palace. It was amazing - some of the rooms below ground level looked really wonderful, with beautiful wall paintings - bright blue colours. And just standing on the hill, in the searing sun, listening to the cikadas and realizing that this, at least, was probably just what Theseus experienced ... well, that in itself left a lasting memory, that's for sure.
Reply
I was reading about the public baths in Rome and how huge some of them were, the other day. I've only seen the Roman Baths in Bath, but apparently in Rome some of them were enormous.
Reply
It did make me feel very small; so much history! And yet I was here and they were all gone ... no, I can't explain it, but I'm really glad I went. I've visited Acropolis, too, and it's was impressive and there were lots of things to see, but Knossos somehow made more of an impression. Atmosphere, I suppose.
Reply
Reply
Shocking! I hope you dumped him asap!
But who am I to rant - I bet the boys I dated didn't even know where or what Knossos was. :-(
I'd like to see Delphi, too, I read a thriller set around there
Oh yes! Perhaps there's still "something" there and you would start prophesizing. The book you read was a thriller you said: which one was it? I initially thought it might have been one of the Falco books (used
to read them - great fun).
Reply
Lol, maybe if I breathe in something hallucinogenic d;-)
Oh, I never dated him, he was not interested, but I knew him well, I did think him shallow after that though. XD
The books was called My Brother Michael, I think it was written in the 70's, by Mary Stewart, great descriptions, but she had traveled all these places, and I felt I was really there, whichever book I read of hers.
Reply
Later, we went down and saw amazing wall paintings (leaping dolphins and bull jumpers) but I believe someone told me that those rooms have been closed to the public now in order to better preserve what's left.
Reply
Reply
Reply
Leave a comment