Some Thoughts on Elven Sanitation

[lissas_elves]

It's a dirty job, but somebody's got to wonder about it ... This subject is not for the squeamish!

Thank you to Cal for betaing.

‘On Elven Sanitation’ or ‘The Joys of Indoor Plumbing’
Introduction:

I’m sure The Last Homely House had running water, indoor WC and bathrooms - these clever Noldor did so like to invent things - but how do you

Comments

[chaotic_binky]

I always assumed the elves might have public toilets, which stood over a big pit that after a while was filled in and maybe made into a flowerbed perhaps lol It is not such a leap away from the public bath idea.

I always wonder where characters go to the toilet and how their hair looks so perfect after a month of now brushing it.

Hugs Binky xxxxx

[lissas_elves]

lol - nice idea with the toilet-transformed-into-flowerbed; I'm sure you could grow some amazing roses in it! Hmmm, the next time I read about Galadriel's garden I'd better not think about this. *g*

Hey, how about we try to start a new trend: realistic stories (at least as far as hygiene is concerned).

There must be at least one mention of the hero/heroine going to the toilet.
They cannot have perfect hair after a week in the wilderness/a wild night in bed with each other.
And under no circumstances will one of the parties lick the others toes (or any other body parts, for that matter) before they've had a bath after said week in the wilderniss!!!

Wanna join?

[chaotic_binky]

In Ereolas: Oropher Unbound, Ereolas discussed his toilet arrangements and the fluffy pads they use to wipe their bums with - the fluff was from a plant and too weak for papermaking but ideal when compressed for wiping bums.

My elves also fart as in Erestor Fartypants and they also get body odour if they have been sweating. There must be a reason why they take so many baths lol

Yup, I'll join!

Hugs Binky xxxxxxx

[lissas_elves]

Oh yes! I remember reading about the toilet pads and thinking: yes! finally a writer with guts ... lol

Hmm, what to call this new 'wave' ... Neo-excrementalism? j/k

[chaotic_binky]

Lol - good title!

:D