I hate Saturdays...like most people hate Mondays...

[lissa_andstuff]

I miss getting the house ready for a visit. I miss getting the pepsi and cheese and garlic in the cupboards. I miss getting the house "guest" ready. I miss cleaning out the car and making Margret shiney and clean and ready to pick up our visitor. I miss driving to the airport and waiting at the Delta Entrance. When it started I could meet him at the gate..then 9/11 and then I could meet him at the exit ramp...then life just gts more hectic..and I miss putting his things in my car. Him getting out claire alittle stuffed tiger I bought him at a truck stop on the way home from a meeting in columbus and having the girls fake illness so they can try to go to the airport with me. I miss knowing that he will have with him more hours of tape that I would ever watch...that he leaves stuff behind...cause I know he wanted to stay behind. I miss the look on Molly's face when she got off hte bus and he was there..she was beyond happy. I miss him making me garlic bread and food I don't normally eat and he always did...frankly its not good for you all the time. Obviously..that stuff can lead to a heart attack. I miss hearing him in the kitchen....cleaning my kitchen..ahh how I love that dish washing sound..when its not me doing it. LOL...I miss him at the other end of my phone. I miss the look of interest Kate had when he talked.

But I know he's here with me..but still I miss the physical things. I thought it would get easier..it has not. I thought I would get better I have not..well not in the way I thought I would.

I do not miss saying goodbye. I hated it when he got on the plane..I liked planning for it..but I hated him leaving. I hated knowing he would be sad someplace far away from me and I couldn't help him.

I'm glad I had this expeirence but it's so bitter...bleah.

ooo ooo ooo ooo oooo burn the whole day..down.

boo..