Because if he did, he'd totally love this:
http://www.meatcards.com/ Yes, ladies and gentleman, business cards made out of meat. Two ingredients, the website says, "Meat and lasers". Business cards that will help you survive the econoclypse indeed. Yummy, yummy business cards.
(edit: Oops... I said "business cards made out of meet" tee hee. fixed. Maybe I shoulda just left it that way.)