2010 End of Year Assessment
This is the second time I've attempted to write a 2010 wrap-up post. I want to write something that's a meaningful record of my accomplishments this year without it turning into a tedious list of goals to cross off. I also want to outline some new directions for the new year - I hesitate to say "goal" here, because Lord knows I have enough of those already.
This is harder than you might expect.
So what have I accomplished in 2010?
- Found a full-time job in my chosen field, front-end web development. Last year's collage had a lot to do with freelance success, but I was relieved and pleased to be hired as an Associate Web Producer with IDG in June. I've been here six months now, and it continues to be awesome in every way. Like every job, it has trying days, but for once in my life I feel like I have really found a good fit in terms of my career. I've even received a raise and several bonuses since being there.
Best of all, when my manager left--something which worried me--I recommended my pal Beth H., who I worked with when I was freelancing at Nowspeed, for the position. She was hired and starts on Monday! So not only do I get to work with someone I know and like, but I get a $1000 bonus for recommending someone to the company!
- Kept track of everything I ate for a month in August. While tracking my food does get me thinking in the right direction in terms of moderating what I eat, it doesn't go far enough - more on that later.
- Finally visited Providence with Matt, visiting various Lovecraftian sites.
- Read Vanity Fair, one on my list of Important Victorian novels to read. It's definitely a book I'm glad to have read, although the actual reading thereof was not always scintillating.
- Played in thirteen new (to me) LARPs this year.
- I continued to not play WoW.
- I finally cut non-dairy creamer out of my life? I dunno, we're getting to the end here.
What haven't I done in 2010?
- Not nearly enough writing. No new LARPs, only minor progress on Jewel, not even another NaNo attempt.
- Not nearly enough language learning.
- Not nearly enough living in my own body and seeing out my own eyes. Years of habits die hard, I guess. I still find it hard to believe that there are cells and tissues and organs beneath my skin, which makes meaningful change towards a healthier lifestyle difficult.
What do I want to do in 2011?
While no one's 100% sure that I have PCOS--since it's a diagnosis of exclusion--and no one's 100% sure that PCOS is entirely caused by insulin resistance (which is tied to weight, and hey, I am technically obese these days), I do know that it explains a lot. Like, for example, the strange but inevitable peckishness I feel after eating a large, carb-heavy meal, even when my stomach still feels full. That's almost certainly an insulin surge.
A digression now, but only sort of: for a while now I've been following the diet efforts of both natbudin and ketsugami. Nat is going the more traditional route of counting calories, and Django is using the South Beach Diet. Both have had reasonable success in their efforts, and I'm sure they're both decent enough diets, for the right sort of person.
However, ultimately I decided to try South Beach next - started today, in fact, after an orgiastic NYE feast last night. It seems like it will most immediately address the issue of insulin resistance and carb craving. I also think I am more of an "abstainer" than a "moderator" - I do better at modifying my behavior by eliminating the forbidden thing than by trying to lessen my intake of it. Ultimately, I'd like to lose 35 lbs or so, down to 135 or 140 lbs.
Matt, wonder of wonders, has agreed to give it a try, as well. I used up my store of Paperbackswap credits to order a bunch of the South Beach books, bought a $2 app for my iPad called MealBoard for planning meals, and I've spent a good chunk of this week putting together a meal plan for the two dreadful weeks of phase 1. We went shopping yesterday, spent nearly $200 on food, and were up today at noon making frittatas. I weighed in at 171.6 this morning. So far, so good, though that's not saying much.
Does it gall me to admit this? Yes. I hate it. What's more middle-class and superficial than starting a diet on January 1st? But I feel like I have to do something. I wish food was not as delicious and exercise as odious, and I wish I didn't have such dreadful heredity. But I sure dig living, and at the end of the day, that's what it's all about.
That's probably enough for one lone girl. But I do want to address the lack of those generative activities I mentioned - like writing, language study, crafting, and others - which always seem to fall to the bottom of my priority list.
One thing I discussed with my therapist earlier this week is that I need to schedule - really, physically, schedule, in a calendar and everything - time for these kinds of activities. I'm thinking Tuesday evenings are a good day for one of these sessions, because I'm by myself (Matt has his GURPS game on Tuesdays). So for two hours on Tuesdays--say 8pm to 10pm--I will do one of my generative activities. It can be any from the list I mentioned above, but it has to be one and only one - no switching tasks.
Consider it added to Gcal. If you see me or hear from me on Wednesday morning, feel free to ask me what I did with my creative time on Tuesday ;)
In general I think my theme for this year is going to be Making Time for What's Important - my body, my creativity, and my intellectual curiosity.
And that - that! - is more than enough for one girl.
This is harder than you might expect.
So what have I accomplished in 2010?
- Found a full-time job in my chosen field, front-end web development. Last year's collage had a lot to do with freelance success, but I was relieved and pleased to be hired as an Associate Web Producer with IDG in June. I've been here six months now, and it continues to be awesome in every way. Like every job, it has trying days, but for once in my life I feel like I have really found a good fit in terms of my career. I've even received a raise and several bonuses since being there.
Best of all, when my manager left--something which worried me--I recommended my pal Beth H., who I worked with when I was freelancing at Nowspeed, for the position. She was hired and starts on Monday! So not only do I get to work with someone I know and like, but I get a $1000 bonus for recommending someone to the company!
- Kept track of everything I ate for a month in August. While tracking my food does get me thinking in the right direction in terms of moderating what I eat, it doesn't go far enough - more on that later.
- Finally visited Providence with Matt, visiting various Lovecraftian sites.
- Read Vanity Fair, one on my list of Important Victorian novels to read. It's definitely a book I'm glad to have read, although the actual reading thereof was not always scintillating.
- Played in thirteen new (to me) LARPs this year.
- I continued to not play WoW.
- I finally cut non-dairy creamer out of my life? I dunno, we're getting to the end here.
What haven't I done in 2010?
- Not nearly enough writing. No new LARPs, only minor progress on Jewel, not even another NaNo attempt.
- Not nearly enough language learning.
- Not nearly enough living in my own body and seeing out my own eyes. Years of habits die hard, I guess. I still find it hard to believe that there are cells and tissues and organs beneath my skin, which makes meaningful change towards a healthier lifestyle difficult.
What do I want to do in 2011?
While no one's 100% sure that I have PCOS--since it's a diagnosis of exclusion--and no one's 100% sure that PCOS is entirely caused by insulin resistance (which is tied to weight, and hey, I am technically obese these days), I do know that it explains a lot. Like, for example, the strange but inevitable peckishness I feel after eating a large, carb-heavy meal, even when my stomach still feels full. That's almost certainly an insulin surge.
A digression now, but only sort of: for a while now I've been following the diet efforts of both natbudin and ketsugami. Nat is going the more traditional route of counting calories, and Django is using the South Beach Diet. Both have had reasonable success in their efforts, and I'm sure they're both decent enough diets, for the right sort of person.
However, ultimately I decided to try South Beach next - started today, in fact, after an orgiastic NYE feast last night. It seems like it will most immediately address the issue of insulin resistance and carb craving. I also think I am more of an "abstainer" than a "moderator" - I do better at modifying my behavior by eliminating the forbidden thing than by trying to lessen my intake of it. Ultimately, I'd like to lose 35 lbs or so, down to 135 or 140 lbs.
Matt, wonder of wonders, has agreed to give it a try, as well. I used up my store of Paperbackswap credits to order a bunch of the South Beach books, bought a $2 app for my iPad called MealBoard for planning meals, and I've spent a good chunk of this week putting together a meal plan for the two dreadful weeks of phase 1. We went shopping yesterday, spent nearly $200 on food, and were up today at noon making frittatas. I weighed in at 171.6 this morning. So far, so good, though that's not saying much.
Does it gall me to admit this? Yes. I hate it. What's more middle-class and superficial than starting a diet on January 1st? But I feel like I have to do something. I wish food was not as delicious and exercise as odious, and I wish I didn't have such dreadful heredity. But I sure dig living, and at the end of the day, that's what it's all about.
That's probably enough for one lone girl. But I do want to address the lack of those generative activities I mentioned - like writing, language study, crafting, and others - which always seem to fall to the bottom of my priority list.
One thing I discussed with my therapist earlier this week is that I need to schedule - really, physically, schedule, in a calendar and everything - time for these kinds of activities. I'm thinking Tuesday evenings are a good day for one of these sessions, because I'm by myself (Matt has his GURPS game on Tuesdays). So for two hours on Tuesdays--say 8pm to 10pm--I will do one of my generative activities. It can be any from the list I mentioned above, but it has to be one and only one - no switching tasks.
Consider it added to Gcal. If you see me or hear from me on Wednesday morning, feel free to ask me what I did with my creative time on Tuesday ;)
In general I think my theme for this year is going to be Making Time for What's Important - my body, my creativity, and my intellectual curiosity.
And that - that! - is more than enough for one girl.