How do you choose?
Now more than ever. I have no idea what to do. In the next four months I have a decision to make. UGH! The thing is, I am stressing so much because I think I have already made my decision. I think home is where I will return after graduation. I met my nephew, Shawn Aidan, tonight. He was so small. He had so much hair, and he was so precious. He's only nine days old. I held him for a long time and talked with angie and lorrie and realized that I can be close with my family. When you think of your closest family, you think mom and dad. well I don't have that. All of my family is just my family. They all have their own family unit, but I kind of drift from one to another. I have no family near where I would be if I stayed in B'ham. I hung out with Charli today. We went shopping.She knows me better than anyone. I can't imagine living far away from her or missing Addison grow up.I have Kailey, Dillon,Cody , and now Shawn and I don't want to miss them grow up. The family that I do have is important to me. I have missed so much of them already growing up. Coming home on the weekends won't cut it.
Then theres the other hand. My friends, who over the last couple of years have become my family, they have been there throughout every day and they have come to know who I am. I'm not sure if my family sees that.. My friends have watched me get my heart broken and watched me laugh and watched me cry and probably watched me do some stupid shit in between. Coming home means leaving all of that. I never want any of you guys to think that you don't mean the world to me or how hard this decision really is. It's hard though because most of my friends have family near b'ham and mine is not that close and accessible so it's hard for you to understand. I want to live my life and whatever decision I make I want to do it for me. I am not sure where I belong. Family is important to me. Friends are the family you get to choose though.
Damn. I know how hard it is for me to make a decision, I can barely decide what kind of clothes to buy or what I want off of a menu at a restuarant....How the hell am I gonna do this?
Then theres the other hand. My friends, who over the last couple of years have become my family, they have been there throughout every day and they have come to know who I am. I'm not sure if my family sees that.. My friends have watched me get my heart broken and watched me laugh and watched me cry and probably watched me do some stupid shit in between. Coming home means leaving all of that. I never want any of you guys to think that you don't mean the world to me or how hard this decision really is. It's hard though because most of my friends have family near b'ham and mine is not that close and accessible so it's hard for you to understand. I want to live my life and whatever decision I make I want to do it for me. I am not sure where I belong. Family is important to me. Friends are the family you get to choose though.
Damn. I know how hard it is for me to make a decision, I can barely decide what kind of clothes to buy or what I want off of a menu at a restuarant....How the hell am I gonna do this?