(no subject)
Just to let you know, Shane is the guy I've been somewhat infatuated with since... well, for a while now. So yea. Bear with me! LOL!
WHY can't I stop thinking about SHANE?! I've promised myself that I would never let assumtions or dishonesty interfere with my personal life. I'm making an assumtion though, that I've lost my chance with Shane at least 90% of the way. It's very accurate in my opinion. We were having a discussion about my pre-vocal jazz tryout jitters, and he said, "Do or Do not, There is no try." Meaning if I "Do" make it into vocal jazz I'd have gone above and beyond my personal, so called, best. If I "Do not" make itin, it meant that I'd thought just being myself would get me into vocal jazz. Now if you replace the words, an intimate look on a relationship with Shane, (intimate meaning a very close experience witha relationship with him, and look meaning feeling (by eye and ear probably might be what I'm looking for)), then you get the reasoning for my educated assumtion; theory rather.
So the following revised passage to the prior one would be-
Do or Do not, There is no try. Menaing if I "Do" make it with Shane, I will have gone above and beyond my personal, so called, best. If I "Do not" make it with Shane, it will mean that I'd thought just being myself would help me make it with Shane. Another reason- shane had strted calling me and texting me, subtlly but surely, for the fun of making me happy or for good conversation. Then I started doing the same thing back, but I did it SURELY SUFFICATINGLY!!!!! Yea, he's stopped making any form of contact with me, accept for I.M., outside of waving at me in the hallways. Even on I.M. we don't have discussions anymore. It was there. The feeling and conversation WAS THERE. I think I need to lay low on the whole tall philosipher (Shane) thing. I mean, the infatuition mixed with fantasies of listening and deep conversation, are still there. It's all just been put on hold until I know something for sure.
I have a headache now...
WHY can't I stop thinking about SHANE?! I've promised myself that I would never let assumtions or dishonesty interfere with my personal life. I'm making an assumtion though, that I've lost my chance with Shane at least 90% of the way. It's very accurate in my opinion. We were having a discussion about my pre-vocal jazz tryout jitters, and he said, "Do or Do not, There is no try." Meaning if I "Do" make it into vocal jazz I'd have gone above and beyond my personal, so called, best. If I "Do not" make itin, it meant that I'd thought just being myself would get me into vocal jazz. Now if you replace the words, an intimate look on a relationship with Shane, (intimate meaning a very close experience witha relationship with him, and look meaning feeling (by eye and ear probably might be what I'm looking for)), then you get the reasoning for my educated assumtion; theory rather.
So the following revised passage to the prior one would be-
Do or Do not, There is no try. Menaing if I "Do" make it with Shane, I will have gone above and beyond my personal, so called, best. If I "Do not" make it with Shane, it will mean that I'd thought just being myself would help me make it with Shane. Another reason- shane had strted calling me and texting me, subtlly but surely, for the fun of making me happy or for good conversation. Then I started doing the same thing back, but I did it SURELY SUFFICATINGLY!!!!! Yea, he's stopped making any form of contact with me, accept for I.M., outside of waving at me in the hallways. Even on I.M. we don't have discussions anymore. It was there. The feeling and conversation WAS THERE. I think I need to lay low on the whole tall philosipher (Shane) thing. I mean, the infatuition mixed with fantasies of listening and deep conversation, are still there. It's all just been put on hold until I know something for sure.
I have a headache now...