Today I murdered a condom because I was horny
I love this headline. It was created from some goofy myspace bulletin thing. It makes sense in a very strange way too. I am horny, and I would murder a condom out of frustration and there being lack of penis in my life. Lol. I'm so strange.
Anyway. There was a more intelligent purpose to this entry. Hard to believe, I know. Things are confusing as usual, and I am being more indecisive than ever before. I still don't know where I should be, job/career-wise. Play N Learn? Camp Fire? Gulliver's? I just want to be happy at work. I just want to make some money and get out of debt, and not live paycheck to paycheck.
I may not get any financial aid this semester from UAF. Which totally sucks, because that's what I was going to use to pay for this semester's payment plan, and for living expenses as well. So now I might be up shit creek some more financially.
I don't have the motivation anymore for AiO and my Graphic Design degree. I was pursuing a bachelor's there. I want to pull out completely, and just focus on my ECE degree. But, I'm also considering scaling back and just getting my Associate's right now, and work on my Bachelor's later if the mood strikes. That's what I should do. But, we'll see.
I want to hurry up and get my Associate's in ECE done, so then I can move on and get my Bachelor's, which they don't offer here. Of course, I don't know what the rush is, because I can't decide where to get my Bachelor's from. Eastern Washington? Or U of MN Duluth? I have been wanting to attend either schools since my junior year. But I sucked at SAT's, twice, and well, both schools like decent SAT's.
I am on the last 3 days of Color Theory now. Hopefully I can pass this damn class this time. The class is so easy now that I know the program and stuff, but this teacher this time is a HARD ASS. I've been busting ass, going above and beyond everything, working day and night on that damn class, and then all my hard work is rewarded with B's and C's. How the fuck am I supposed to get an A in the class? I just don't understand. This teacher and her harshness aren't helping me to want to attend class anymore, or even school.
My next class that starts on Thursday is Sociology. I have mixed feelings about this class. I'm glad there is no computer program to learn this time, my ECE class is too demanding for that. It has a nice structure that isn't fucked up and doesn't change back and forth. It seems straight-forward. On the other hand...I have already taken Soc. here at UAF, and passed with a B. But AiO wouldn't count it as a transfer credit, because the class here was "too localized". Whatever. We didn't study Alaska or any crap like that at all. It was as general as could be. I also am not looking forward to the weekly requirement of an Application Project. They aren't real projects. They are freaking dumbass papers. I hate writing papers. They stress me out. I can't convey thoughts well. I don't know anything about footnotes and bibliographies and dumb crap like that. Whatever. At least the topics we have to write them about aren't that bad. For two of them, we have to watch a movie or a tv show and analyze it. I don't mind kicking back and watching some boob tube for school. Another one is observing a learning situation, like teachers and children or day care providers and children. That'll be so tough.
It's 2:21am. I am so tired. I want to go to bed. I can't/shouldn't. I have so much work to do still. I haven't left any feedback for anyone in Color Theory yet, or wrote my Bullying Cirriculum project outline yet, or put together my Winter Gear poster yet, or done my reading and response for my ECE class either. So what the hell did I do all weekend? A lot, though it doesn't sound or seem like it. I wrote my paper on Kandinsky, got my cirriculum stuff together, researched frostbite, hypothermia, and frostnip, and got some other stuff together for that project, made my color project for this week, and finished my lab for my ECE class. My room is still a mess. I barely have made contact with anyone this weekend, and am feeling a little lonely. Shit. I just realized I never did my planners for Camp Fire. Shit, fuck, shit, fuck. Those take priority over everything else. I guess enough of taking a break.
I don't know why I write about this crap. No one cares. Not even me. And it's not like writing about any of my problems helps me to figure them out and decide things. I guess I do it to avoid homework and things and to provide entertainment for myself and others who look at these and laugh at how stupid it all is.
I shouldn't drink anymore. I really never do to begin with, really. But I had some kiwi-strawberry flavored malt stuff earlier, just to see what it tasted like. I think I had too much, because my brain is a little more fucked up than normal. Need proof? Look at the random retardedness I wrote about.
Planners. Right.
Anyway. There was a more intelligent purpose to this entry. Hard to believe, I know. Things are confusing as usual, and I am being more indecisive than ever before. I still don't know where I should be, job/career-wise. Play N Learn? Camp Fire? Gulliver's? I just want to be happy at work. I just want to make some money and get out of debt, and not live paycheck to paycheck.
I may not get any financial aid this semester from UAF. Which totally sucks, because that's what I was going to use to pay for this semester's payment plan, and for living expenses as well. So now I might be up shit creek some more financially.
I don't have the motivation anymore for AiO and my Graphic Design degree. I was pursuing a bachelor's there. I want to pull out completely, and just focus on my ECE degree. But, I'm also considering scaling back and just getting my Associate's right now, and work on my Bachelor's later if the mood strikes. That's what I should do. But, we'll see.
I want to hurry up and get my Associate's in ECE done, so then I can move on and get my Bachelor's, which they don't offer here. Of course, I don't know what the rush is, because I can't decide where to get my Bachelor's from. Eastern Washington? Or U of MN Duluth? I have been wanting to attend either schools since my junior year. But I sucked at SAT's, twice, and well, both schools like decent SAT's.
I am on the last 3 days of Color Theory now. Hopefully I can pass this damn class this time. The class is so easy now that I know the program and stuff, but this teacher this time is a HARD ASS. I've been busting ass, going above and beyond everything, working day and night on that damn class, and then all my hard work is rewarded with B's and C's. How the fuck am I supposed to get an A in the class? I just don't understand. This teacher and her harshness aren't helping me to want to attend class anymore, or even school.
My next class that starts on Thursday is Sociology. I have mixed feelings about this class. I'm glad there is no computer program to learn this time, my ECE class is too demanding for that. It has a nice structure that isn't fucked up and doesn't change back and forth. It seems straight-forward. On the other hand...I have already taken Soc. here at UAF, and passed with a B. But AiO wouldn't count it as a transfer credit, because the class here was "too localized". Whatever. We didn't study Alaska or any crap like that at all. It was as general as could be. I also am not looking forward to the weekly requirement of an Application Project. They aren't real projects. They are freaking dumbass papers. I hate writing papers. They stress me out. I can't convey thoughts well. I don't know anything about footnotes and bibliographies and dumb crap like that. Whatever. At least the topics we have to write them about aren't that bad. For two of them, we have to watch a movie or a tv show and analyze it. I don't mind kicking back and watching some boob tube for school. Another one is observing a learning situation, like teachers and children or day care providers and children. That'll be so tough.
It's 2:21am. I am so tired. I want to go to bed. I can't/shouldn't. I have so much work to do still. I haven't left any feedback for anyone in Color Theory yet, or wrote my Bullying Cirriculum project outline yet, or put together my Winter Gear poster yet, or done my reading and response for my ECE class either. So what the hell did I do all weekend? A lot, though it doesn't sound or seem like it. I wrote my paper on Kandinsky, got my cirriculum stuff together, researched frostbite, hypothermia, and frostnip, and got some other stuff together for that project, made my color project for this week, and finished my lab for my ECE class. My room is still a mess. I barely have made contact with anyone this weekend, and am feeling a little lonely. Shit. I just realized I never did my planners for Camp Fire. Shit, fuck, shit, fuck. Those take priority over everything else. I guess enough of taking a break.
I don't know why I write about this crap. No one cares. Not even me. And it's not like writing about any of my problems helps me to figure them out and decide things. I guess I do it to avoid homework and things and to provide entertainment for myself and others who look at these and laugh at how stupid it all is.
I shouldn't drink anymore. I really never do to begin with, really. But I had some kiwi-strawberry flavored malt stuff earlier, just to see what it tasted like. I think I had too much, because my brain is a little more fucked up than normal. Need proof? Look at the random retardedness I wrote about.
Planners. Right.