(no subject)
(ed. note: this entry was originally written at 1am this morning. since whether I can connect to the internet at any point depends on the fickle mercy of my neighbor's wireless connection, I was unable to post this until now).
I just got back from the greatest Jdate EVER!!!
Things that made it amazing:
a) although I expected the guy to be short and skinny, he was only one of those things (short - and only maybe an inch or so shorter than my un-shoed height).
b) we got along very well, and had a lot of things to talk about. good flirtatious energy. he's not drop-dead gorgeous, but he's attractive.
c) we went here: http://www.jaleo.com/
c1) excellent sangrias
c2) dinner (tapas) was DELICIOUS. we had 1) Apple and 'Pasamontés Manchego' cheese salad with walnuts; 2) Scallops with ‘romesco’ sauce; 3) Saffron rice with mussels and cuttlefish; 4) grilled lamb chops with peaches; 5) calamari.
d) his arm was in a sling (shoulder surgery), so there were a few times where he needed me to help him with something...like tearing off a piece of bread or cutting his meat. This is inherently ridiculous, but he recognized how absurd it was that I was cutting my date's meat during our first dinner (rawr). The joy of this is that I get a ridiculous story to tell about the guy - that normally would come at the cost of a really awkward and uncomfortable date - but in this case was just a kind of funny caveat to an otherwise excellent date.
e) add to dinner a pitcher of WHITE wine sangrias.
f) he paid for dinner AND drinks, even though I offered to buy the pitcher.
g) we walked to a nearby bar for beer, where I GOT HIT ON BY A PICKUP ARTIST!!!
Editor's Note: these kinds of situations make me really upset that I have not been updating regularly. For those who haven't spoken to me recently, I've become obsessed with this show on VH1 called "The Pickup Artist." On the show, this guy named "Mystery", who's supposed to be the greatest pick-up artist in the world, teaches 8 geeky men how to pick up any woman they want in a bar. I find the show compelling, and even more interesting is that the methods are EXCELLENT.
If you know me well, then you know that when I'm really into something, I tend to read up about it on the internet obsessively. I've been reading a lot about the method they teach on The Pick Up Artist, and I've become fascinated with how it works. It is so beautifully manipulative, so squarely based in female psychology, that even knowing the details of the general script a guy is supposed to follow with this method, I would still be totally receptive to it because it's so wonderfully conceived. I should add, as was pointed out by Tony, the person in the bar last night was NOT one of the people from the show, but was someone who clearly follows their teachings.
Anyway, I've been unbelievably curious about whether or not guys actually do this kind of thing...to the point where I am now more interested in going to bars or nightclubs simply for the possibility of encountering something like this. My recent daydream has been to be approached by a guy who is clearly using this method and to recognize it for what it is, but not to call him out on it until the end of our conversation - I want to see how the whole thing plays out and enjoy the beauty of the process.
So me and my Jdate went to this bar, where we have about five or ten minutes of conversation before we start talking about trashy TV that we watch, and I mention The Pick-Up Artist (reluctant to even bring it up because of how much I've been talking about it lately). I'm in the middle of telling him about the premise of "openers" - approaching women who are with other people and engaging the whole group - when I guy (who I'm absolutely certain did not hear our convo) walks up to us and USES AN OPENER, VERBATIM, FROM THE SHOW.
"Hey, lemme ask you guys a question. I'm throwing my friend a bachelor's party..."
Seriously, this is in episode 2 of TPUA in the lesson "opening a set." I am ELATED that this is actually happening...although I figure it's possible that i'm just reading too much into his simple question due to the fact that I was JUST talking about this subject, I am almost sure that the guy is using the method. I am totally into it...I want to see this play out.
My date is a bit confused by this guy's conversation. The PUA walks away after a bit (as I knew he would...that's the method) and I explain to my Jdate what is going on. He is taken aback that this guy is trying to hit on me while he's there, and I explain that that's exactly what the method is all about, and we start talking about it. The PUA literally started talking to us during a lull in our conversation about the show, so we're both pretty surprised that we're seeing it happen in real life.
Then the PUA comes back and does a "psychic" trick for us, taken DIRECTLY from TPUA episode 1. This is exciting for me, because they don't show you how the trick concludes on the show (and I didn't see it on the message boards), they just show you the teaser..."Pick a number, 1 through 7 - DON'T SAY IT - i'll come back." This is exactly what the guy does. I am thrilled. My dream come true.
[It's actually a great, manipulative trick...if you guess right, then you "prove" you are psychic. If you guess wrong (most likely) then you blame it not on your own psychic ability but say that you can only work with the psychic energy you are given, and the "target" girl (me) and her "obstacle" (my date) are just not giving off a good, unified psychic energy. He later does another psychic trick which, he says, proves that the problem is with the two of us, not with him.
Anyway, to make a long story slightly shorter, the guy is definitely, definitely using TEXTBOOK mystery method (www.venutianarts.com) and I can identify everything that is happening. I felt like I felt the day I aced the LSAT - I knew all the answers. To our conversation. It was unbelievable. At one point, he even points to someone and says, "see those boots she's wearing? they're ridiculous. that's called 'peacocking.'" He then goes on to explain this concept, central to the mystery method, which of course I am already very familiar with. (Unfortunately, he is not peacocked at all, but I guess you can't have everything.)
A few times during the evening, I drop some references...I say something about appreciating a little bit of "mystery" in another person...he might have been looking for an opener to use on someone else, and I suggested one from the most recent episode of TPUA (saying that it once worked on me)...I used a bit of his lingo at some point... each time, he gave me these kind of sidelong glances, as if not quite sure what to make of what I'd said, and then I smiled and the conversation moved on.
f) - what letter are we on?
h) My date, who seemed to see how excited I was that we were living an episode of TPUA, was only mildly threatened by the state of events and did not indicate to the PUA that I was on to him...he let me have my fun and was a really excellent sport about everything. Of course, I was genuinely interested in my date, so I tried to instill confidence by touching our legs together or whatnot.
i) The PUA and his wingman (who I clearly recognized as such) had just been to HOOTERS, which as some of you know, I am fascinated with and I am presenting a report about to the American Society of Criminology in November. I was JUST thinking to myself today that I have not done any field work or interviews on Hooters all summer, and was feeling very guilty about this. Cut to eight hours later, at the bar, when wingman brings up their dinner at Hooters. I start asking him about it, and he is giving me SUCH INCREDIBLE INTERVIEW MATERIAL that I lose all semblance of cool, grab several napkins and a pen, and begin transcribing our interview right there at the bar. Then I talk to the PUA about it for a bit. They truly give me some amazing quotes that both support my theses and add new dimensions to it.
j) My date pays for drinks at the bar, even though I sincerely offer!!
k) As the PUA and his friend leave, I pull the PUA aside by the arm and say, "I have a confession for you..." which I can immediately tell he thinks is going to be something along the lines of, "I like you way better than this guy I'm with right now," because he gives my date this sort of fake worried-for-you glance and a shrug as if to say, "sorry, buddy, good effort, but the gig is up, looks like it's game over for you." I look him right in the eyes and tell him that I watch the show The Pick Up Artist and really enjoyed seeing him go through the method in real life.
There is a short pause, and then he bursts into laughter and we start talking about it, and before he leaves he shows me how he did the second psychic trick where he "proves" that he really is psychic - which involved the guessing of a piece of paper that I choose from nine that he lays out on the bar. This is accomplished through a signal from his wingman, who was stationed next to us to "make sure" we picked a piece. The signal was subtle enough that I didn't catch it, and the PUA distracts us anyway with a lot of jibberjabber. Either way, I wasn't trying to figure out his trick...I just wanted to enjoy the process. I'm the same way with movies - I don't bother trying to figure out the ending; I'd rather be surprised at the end. But now that I know it, I'm happy to explain it in more detail if you're interested in using it yourself (Tony, I'm looking at you here).
In our conversation, PUA mentions a girlfriend, so I gather he wasn't out for the action, he just enjoys the game (I can't blame him...it's great). He does tell me that he'll be in the same bar next Friday.
l) my date and I leave the bar JUST IN TIME to catch the last subway...we're both going in the same direction.
m) we make plans to see each other again next week before I get off at my stop (one before his).
GREAT night!!! Not only did I like my date, but my three-week-long dream of seeing a pick-up artist in action came true!! AND I got some work done on the Hooters project!!!!! AHHH! How can I possibly sleep?!?!?! Where is my [neighbor's] internet connection???
I can't wait to tell my coworkers at lunch...I've been talking about the pick-up artist since it aired, and I warned them about the jdate last night. What an excellent merging of stories!
I just got back from the greatest Jdate EVER!!!
Things that made it amazing:
a) although I expected the guy to be short and skinny, he was only one of those things (short - and only maybe an inch or so shorter than my un-shoed height).
b) we got along very well, and had a lot of things to talk about. good flirtatious energy. he's not drop-dead gorgeous, but he's attractive.
c) we went here: http://www.jaleo.com/
c1) excellent sangrias
c2) dinner (tapas) was DELICIOUS. we had 1) Apple and 'Pasamontés Manchego' cheese salad with walnuts; 2) Scallops with ‘romesco’ sauce; 3) Saffron rice with mussels and cuttlefish; 4) grilled lamb chops with peaches; 5) calamari.
d) his arm was in a sling (shoulder surgery), so there were a few times where he needed me to help him with something...like tearing off a piece of bread or cutting his meat. This is inherently ridiculous, but he recognized how absurd it was that I was cutting my date's meat during our first dinner (rawr). The joy of this is that I get a ridiculous story to tell about the guy - that normally would come at the cost of a really awkward and uncomfortable date - but in this case was just a kind of funny caveat to an otherwise excellent date.
e) add to dinner a pitcher of WHITE wine sangrias.
f) he paid for dinner AND drinks, even though I offered to buy the pitcher.
g) we walked to a nearby bar for beer, where I GOT HIT ON BY A PICKUP ARTIST!!!
Editor's Note: these kinds of situations make me really upset that I have not been updating regularly. For those who haven't spoken to me recently, I've become obsessed with this show on VH1 called "The Pickup Artist." On the show, this guy named "Mystery", who's supposed to be the greatest pick-up artist in the world, teaches 8 geeky men how to pick up any woman they want in a bar. I find the show compelling, and even more interesting is that the methods are EXCELLENT.
If you know me well, then you know that when I'm really into something, I tend to read up about it on the internet obsessively. I've been reading a lot about the method they teach on The Pick Up Artist, and I've become fascinated with how it works. It is so beautifully manipulative, so squarely based in female psychology, that even knowing the details of the general script a guy is supposed to follow with this method, I would still be totally receptive to it because it's so wonderfully conceived. I should add, as was pointed out by Tony, the person in the bar last night was NOT one of the people from the show, but was someone who clearly follows their teachings.
Anyway, I've been unbelievably curious about whether or not guys actually do this kind of thing...to the point where I am now more interested in going to bars or nightclubs simply for the possibility of encountering something like this. My recent daydream has been to be approached by a guy who is clearly using this method and to recognize it for what it is, but not to call him out on it until the end of our conversation - I want to see how the whole thing plays out and enjoy the beauty of the process.
So me and my Jdate went to this bar, where we have about five or ten minutes of conversation before we start talking about trashy TV that we watch, and I mention The Pick-Up Artist (reluctant to even bring it up because of how much I've been talking about it lately). I'm in the middle of telling him about the premise of "openers" - approaching women who are with other people and engaging the whole group - when I guy (who I'm absolutely certain did not hear our convo) walks up to us and USES AN OPENER, VERBATIM, FROM THE SHOW.
"Hey, lemme ask you guys a question. I'm throwing my friend a bachelor's party..."
Seriously, this is in episode 2 of TPUA in the lesson "opening a set." I am ELATED that this is actually happening...although I figure it's possible that i'm just reading too much into his simple question due to the fact that I was JUST talking about this subject, I am almost sure that the guy is using the method. I am totally into it...I want to see this play out.
My date is a bit confused by this guy's conversation. The PUA walks away after a bit (as I knew he would...that's the method) and I explain to my Jdate what is going on. He is taken aback that this guy is trying to hit on me while he's there, and I explain that that's exactly what the method is all about, and we start talking about it. The PUA literally started talking to us during a lull in our conversation about the show, so we're both pretty surprised that we're seeing it happen in real life.
Then the PUA comes back and does a "psychic" trick for us, taken DIRECTLY from TPUA episode 1. This is exciting for me, because they don't show you how the trick concludes on the show (and I didn't see it on the message boards), they just show you the teaser..."Pick a number, 1 through 7 - DON'T SAY IT - i'll come back." This is exactly what the guy does. I am thrilled. My dream come true.
[It's actually a great, manipulative trick...if you guess right, then you "prove" you are psychic. If you guess wrong (most likely) then you blame it not on your own psychic ability but say that you can only work with the psychic energy you are given, and the "target" girl (me) and her "obstacle" (my date) are just not giving off a good, unified psychic energy. He later does another psychic trick which, he says, proves that the problem is with the two of us, not with him.
Anyway, to make a long story slightly shorter, the guy is definitely, definitely using TEXTBOOK mystery method (www.venutianarts.com) and I can identify everything that is happening. I felt like I felt the day I aced the LSAT - I knew all the answers. To our conversation. It was unbelievable. At one point, he even points to someone and says, "see those boots she's wearing? they're ridiculous. that's called 'peacocking.'" He then goes on to explain this concept, central to the mystery method, which of course I am already very familiar with. (Unfortunately, he is not peacocked at all, but I guess you can't have everything.)
A few times during the evening, I drop some references...I say something about appreciating a little bit of "mystery" in another person...he might have been looking for an opener to use on someone else, and I suggested one from the most recent episode of TPUA (saying that it once worked on me)...I used a bit of his lingo at some point... each time, he gave me these kind of sidelong glances, as if not quite sure what to make of what I'd said, and then I smiled and the conversation moved on.
f) - what letter are we on?
h) My date, who seemed to see how excited I was that we were living an episode of TPUA, was only mildly threatened by the state of events and did not indicate to the PUA that I was on to him...he let me have my fun and was a really excellent sport about everything. Of course, I was genuinely interested in my date, so I tried to instill confidence by touching our legs together or whatnot.
i) The PUA and his wingman (who I clearly recognized as such) had just been to HOOTERS, which as some of you know, I am fascinated with and I am presenting a report about to the American Society of Criminology in November. I was JUST thinking to myself today that I have not done any field work or interviews on Hooters all summer, and was feeling very guilty about this. Cut to eight hours later, at the bar, when wingman brings up their dinner at Hooters. I start asking him about it, and he is giving me SUCH INCREDIBLE INTERVIEW MATERIAL that I lose all semblance of cool, grab several napkins and a pen, and begin transcribing our interview right there at the bar. Then I talk to the PUA about it for a bit. They truly give me some amazing quotes that both support my theses and add new dimensions to it.
j) My date pays for drinks at the bar, even though I sincerely offer!!
k) As the PUA and his friend leave, I pull the PUA aside by the arm and say, "I have a confession for you..." which I can immediately tell he thinks is going to be something along the lines of, "I like you way better than this guy I'm with right now," because he gives my date this sort of fake worried-for-you glance and a shrug as if to say, "sorry, buddy, good effort, but the gig is up, looks like it's game over for you." I look him right in the eyes and tell him that I watch the show The Pick Up Artist and really enjoyed seeing him go through the method in real life.
There is a short pause, and then he bursts into laughter and we start talking about it, and before he leaves he shows me how he did the second psychic trick where he "proves" that he really is psychic - which involved the guessing of a piece of paper that I choose from nine that he lays out on the bar. This is accomplished through a signal from his wingman, who was stationed next to us to "make sure" we picked a piece. The signal was subtle enough that I didn't catch it, and the PUA distracts us anyway with a lot of jibberjabber. Either way, I wasn't trying to figure out his trick...I just wanted to enjoy the process. I'm the same way with movies - I don't bother trying to figure out the ending; I'd rather be surprised at the end. But now that I know it, I'm happy to explain it in more detail if you're interested in using it yourself (Tony, I'm looking at you here).
In our conversation, PUA mentions a girlfriend, so I gather he wasn't out for the action, he just enjoys the game (I can't blame him...it's great). He does tell me that he'll be in the same bar next Friday.
l) my date and I leave the bar JUST IN TIME to catch the last subway...we're both going in the same direction.
m) we make plans to see each other again next week before I get off at my stop (one before his).
GREAT night!!! Not only did I like my date, but my three-week-long dream of seeing a pick-up artist in action came true!! AND I got some work done on the Hooters project!!!!! AHHH! How can I possibly sleep?!?!?! Where is my [neighbor's] internet connection???
I can't wait to tell my coworkers at lunch...I've been talking about the pick-up artist since it aired, and I warned them about the jdate last night. What an excellent merging of stories!