(no subject)

Nov 25, 2007 11:22

Dreams have such an odd effect on real life. Its so strange to me, that barrier between what is actually there and what was just a figment of my sleep. I have a lot of trouble decifering the two, and even when I do some of it still lingers. It freaks me out.

I'm dreading my return to Norman.
This week has been a rollercoaster.

Why am I so terrified of the future?
Why am I so terrified of growing up?

Life is awfully amazing right now.
Its also amazingly awful.

My mind is spinning a million miles a minute. I wish life had a fast forward button. As well as a pause button. I wouldn't mind a rewind button either. And maybe a record button...

BLEH

Why couldn't I just be one of those incredibly simple people that knows exactly what they want in their life and is 100% content with all the choices they make and the things they do and the places they end up?

I'm drowning in should'ves, could'ves and what ifs.

I wish I could just keep Shelby in my pocket everywhere I go. She reminds me what its like to be simple and happy. I don't want to leave my baby girls again. They're growing up too fast.

Hell, we're all growing up too fast!

In Theatre, we fight for what we do to be more like real life.
I feel like I'm fighting for my real life to be less theatrical.
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