i'm sick
the sleepless nights have caught up with me, i've been a feverish mess for days. wish i had insurance. though i probably have a light case of pneumonia i still took the time to dance in the rain and taunt the lightening yesterday. it was worth it. i stayed home cuz of my fever but i have an interivew for a job tomorrow. i have to make it, for i had an interview on friday, and it would be ideal to pick from these positions. though the first one is working around incarcerated TEENAGERS, which actually sounds very rewarding to me, i think i want this other position more due to the room for advancement i believe it offers. gosh it will be nice to have a job with benefits though. why is the sun shining and the roses blooming? i thought it was going to rain forever. should i go out in my nastiness and enjoy it? :P life's so unsatisfying lately, boring. i really am trying to make the best of it. but i do kind of despise this town and dislike the values most people seem to hold here. never have i had so much meaningless drama, though most of it is coming from eugene :P i stick out like a sore thumb with my animal rights and my soy products. sadly i'm neglecting these values that matter so much to me. no money, no s/o or best friend who eats the way i do or at least helps me cater to it. my choice. blah take me back to the emerald city! ahh!! *deep breath* i shall enjoy what i have and work for whatever it is that i want. do i still want to teach english abroad? maybe. work in another country sounds great, or anything that will get me out of my element. i'm sure that i dont want to settle w/ a house and some random dude, a family, in salem. ugh. nothing wrong with it, but i would not be happy. maybe if i was starry-eyed in love and thought it might work, but that possibility has certainly passed. for the best. sad. it would be nice to have contact again someday. i don't like being sad about a chunk of my life. i do celebrate it, but it is quite bittersweet now. ya, so i'm sick and have enjoyed a day of sleep and tv and i am off to take meds and relax some more. i need to go to work tomorrow and def. kick ass in my interview tomorrow. yay me. also Limewire is awesome. yay for music to fill up the computer.