(no subject)
So I've been sick for 24 days now. I've come to find out I have the colon of an 80 year old. I spent 3 days in the hospital in something called the CDU. Regardless its the emergency room. Prior to this I was a big time party girl. Ever since my break up with Aldwin I drowned my loneliness in hang outs with friends and doing anything I could to forget the fact I lost someone that meant so much to me. Well colitis has given me a lot of much needed alone time and I've come to realize I haven't been living my life. I've been passing by. I truly believe Aldwin and I are meant to be together. I loved Jonathan very much but we were not meant to be and he knew he would do what he did and that's why he never allowed us to be more than bestest friends. But I truly believe that Aldwin and I could save eachother. Save eachother from wondering what more is there to life? Save eachother from a mundane life. I just wonder if he'll ever see it. And if he does see it will he ever acknowledge it? They say change is constant and it is. I see my life changing for the better. No more party girl. A more mature woman is going to raise from this and I just hope I catch Aldwin's attention again. I'm not saying I want us to get married tomorrow and raise a family. I'm just saying I know who I'd like to share my life with as more than a friend. I'm young I wouldn't mind if it were 1, 2, 5 years from now when we get together I just want to get there eventually. Regardless he will always be in my life and it is till death do we part. I just want us to be together before we part. And if we don't then it wasn't meant to be. It's a tune I'm all too familiar with.