Can someone tell me why, please?

[lipchic3]

This is the only thing I have to say: I'm in class, chillin, ya know, as one should. And my phone starts ringing, dont worry it was on silent, but anyways... ITS FUCKING MIKE. You're telling me. So we have this fucking half hour conversation like were best fucking pals. He acts like we're fucking boys. WHY DID YOU CALL!? To rub in in my face? DOn't get me wrong, I acted like everything is fine, because what else does one do? But either way, supposedly we're hangin out when he gets home, and he still wants to see me, etc. Unbenounced to me, IM NOT SUPPOSED to care he took my heart and soul and ripped them in shreds. I mean I still can't feel anything because of this. He hurt me internally, and it's not going to go away. So I start thinking, ok well ya know, he is still my best friend above all things, and I do love him no matter what. So I think constantly about the fact that he called, and now I miss him all over again. I'm back to the beginning. I guess I was never meant to get over this one. Why so I have to love the one I shouldn't, who is half way around the world? The one who left me, the one who put the Marines before me, when I always put him before anything... I guess I'll never know.

Sorry for the bitching. I just am tossing and turning. And to be honest, I don't care who knows my drama. Fuck.