[K-Pop Prompts] #13 - Familiar Sensations
Right....well....I claimed Sihan as a pairing from the K-Pop Prompts Community a bit ago.
And this is the first one i've written.
I...apologise for it...It's just...written...i didn't read it back, so i don't know if it's any good.
It's INCREDIBLY late here...and I apologise if its absolutely rubbish.
It fails...
Title: I Can See You.
Author: linnadhiel_x
Claim: Siwon x Han Geng
Band/Pairing: Super Junior, SiHan.
Prompt: #13 - Familiar Sensations.
Rating: R
Warnings: Angst, Slight AU, Stalking, Voyeurism (Not of a nice variety), Hints of sex, emotional and psychological damage.
Summary: Tucking the end of the sheet under itself leaving the side of the table exposed, Han Geng carefully crawled under the large, eight seater table and sat on his shins against one of the table legs, waiting for Siwon to move towards him, trying to ignore the sharp cracking of his heart as he watched the wide, yet scrutinising eyes rake over his frame from behind trembling folded up limbs, resembling nothing of the once bright, confident yet humble devoted man he had fallen in love with all those years ago.
Han Geng winced slightly in embarrassment as he realised he'd been standing on the doorstep to Siwon's apartment for the past five minutes staring, with an ever growing mass of lead guilt dragging the base of his stomach further into the pull of gravity, at the freshly installed set of three double setting locks in a neat precision on the Chinese male's eye line, despite the fact there was a perfectly fine, and freshly changed lock already situated beneath the door handle. Yet the Chinese male's expression only darkened as he pulled the small key chain from his jeans pocket and peered at the set of four colour coordinated silver keys shining in the soft light drifting through from the sun setting on the horizon, the knot of helplessness tightening ruthlessly around his heart until his blood thumped against his eardrums as he knew without testing that he would need all four keys to unlock the doorway regardless of the fact Siwon knew he was due around.
Rapping his knuckles four times in a steady concession against the middle panel of the doorway, trying to ignore the hastily scratched sign at the side of the door frame which up until recently had declared the property belonged to Choi Siwon, Han Geng swallowed before kicking the base of the doorway lightly, knocking another three times before ringing the door bell twice, each ring being counted for five seconds before he removed his finger and pulled the keys back into view, rather thankful that Ryeowook had, had the sense to colour coordinate them before hand meaning he could swiftly unlock the protective bolts in quick procession and not break the special greeting himself and Siwon had devised so the Korean would know exactly who was trying to get into his apartment and not freak out when the Chinese male visited.
“Shiyuan?” Han Geng called leaning close to the smooth, red gloss wood of the younger male's door to finish off his weird introduction of sorts, knowing that Siwon wouldn't be happy until he'd spoken. “Shiyuan it's me. Can you open the bolts?”
Despite the fact they had a special greeting and all the locks to keep unwanted intruders at bay, Han Geng still found himself waiting on the doorstep as he waited for Siwon to remove the final barrier between the Chinese male and the apartment, the younger male having still not felt safe enough with the locks on the outside and had insisted that he get a bolt and chain for the inside so if someone did try to get in, their efforts would be hindered. Hearing a small tap, tap, tap of cautious, yet almost excited feet, Han Geng listened carefully as Siwon pulled the bolt back with a click of metal, before doing the same with the chain, the Chinese male waiting till he'd heard Siwon stomp off in a whirl of muscle back to the lounge before pushing open the door like they'd originally agreed.
“Shiyuan? Where are you hiding?” Han Geng called after kicking off his shoes in the hallway and padding through to the main part of the apartment, feeling almost like he was playing Hide and Seek with a child, not trying to locate his long term partner, a feeling that only increased as he rounded the corner into the lounge and joint dining area hidden beneath the mass of strategically placed furniture, all draped with endless masses of sheets and blankets the Korean had dug out from one of his many unpacked boxes still piled up in the spare guest bedroom three doors down the corridor behind him, the whole thing looked little more then an incredibly elaborate den that the Chinese male had often attempted to make as a child with his friends, spending hours at a time curled up beneath the four dining chairs draped over with a sheet like some sort of slightly off shaped mini wigwam. “Shiyuan?” Han Geng all but sang as he stepped around the mass of almost tunnel like systems leading from the area down into the kitchen and off back towards the hallway and the other rooms, aiming for the dining table, the centre piece in the maze of sheets and chairs, trying not to shiver too visibly as he could feel Siwon's eyes already burning into him from wherever he hid, something which even after almost two months of the same scenario, he still found slightly daunting.
Dropping down onto his knees, Han Geng carefully and cautiously lifted the end of the sheet over the dining table, knowing he'd hit the jackpot when he heard the distinct shuffle backwards away from his fingers, underlying the slight panicked whimper of shock at his sudden appearance, the Chinese male continuing with his task, slowly revealing himself to the mass of curled limbs cowering beneath the dining table, knowing that if he stopped and moved away it would only make Siwon worse. Tucking the end of the sheet under itself leaving the side of the table exposed, Han Geng carefully crawled under the large, eight seater table and sat on his shins against one of the table legs, waiting for Siwon to move towards him, trying to ignore the sharp cracking of his heart as he watched the wide, yet scrutinising eyes rake over his frame from behind trembling folded up limbs, resembling nothing of the once bright, confident yet humble devoted man he had fallen in love with all those years ago.
“G-Gege?” Hearing the soft, croaking vocals from the corner opposite, Han Geng merely nodded in response before holding his arms open in a silent invite as Siwon hastily rolled his curled form forward onto all fours before he crawled swiftly across towards his Hyung, Han Geng barely able to un-tuck his legs from beneath him to sit cross legged before Siwon had crawled up into his lap and wrapped his long, slender fingers around the collar flaps of his shirt as his legs did the same around his waist, his hands only pausing to pull the sheet back down over the table so they were completely hidden from view once more.
“Shhh...Shiyuan. It's okay, I'm here now.” Han Geng soothed as the mass of limbs curled around him began to tremble with the repressed emotions of being alone with no-one to comfort him in so long, which in reality had only been about six hours. The Chinese male didn't even bother to ask about the mass of maze-like tunnels and hideouts that now made up the younger male's living area, which he himself had painstakingly taken down the day before last when Siwon had declared he'd like to try and live without them, but he couldn't be angry at the young Korean, he had been rather shocked when Siwon had suggested removing his safe haven, Han Geng having assumed it was far too early in the younger male's recovery to think like that.
“M-Mianhae.” Siwon muttered against the curve where his neck met his shoulder, the younger male's face pressed hotly against his skin, harsh, panting puffs of warm air sliding from between his plump lips to caress at the Chinese male's jawline, Han Geng finding himself unable to prevent the small smile crossing his lips as he realised in any other situation the whole thing would have been quite pleasurable, especially with Siwon essentially straddled across his legs, and sat on his crotch. “I promised myself I wouldn't get like this again.”
“It's alright. You feeling a bit better now?” Han Geng queried, before smiling as Siwon nodded against him, pushing away the small annoying spark in the back of his head that reminded he knew full well Siwon was lying and that he wasn't feeling better at all, that little voice doing nothing but causing his own chest to tighten in pain at how little he could do to help his partner. “This looks comfy Shiyuan.” Han Geng added with a small light chuckle in an attempt to lighten his partner's spirits as his eyes panned across the small collection of spare blankets, pillows, cushions and the small hugging Panda and Lion cubs plushy they had bought each other as a joke when they'd first started dating, and which Ryeowook had sown together one anniversary claiming it was to permanently join the pair of them together as well. Siwon had clearly been using the area to sleep in again, or at least, attempt to sleep in.
Nodding slightly, Siwon sighed and slipped rather fluidly off Han Geng's lap to lay back and sprawl across the floor, head just about reaching the plushies, which he quickly snatched up and held close to his chest as he peered unblinking up at the underside of the dining table, ignoring the confused blink and still extended arms of the Chinese male who hadn't been expecting him to move away, unable to prevent a small twitch of a smile, nothing like his trademark large dimpled one, spreading across his face as Han Geng quickly crawled over so he was hovering above him, blocking his view of the table wood, features schooled into a confused yet thoughtful expression.
“Shiyuan, you look shattered baby. Maybe you should get some sleep.” Han Geng breathed, shifting his weight to one hand as the other moved to brush the unkempt short spikes of ebony hair out of the male's face, fingertips rubbing gently at the silky ends until Siwon tilted his head up so his cheek was cupped against Han Geng's palm, the large onyx irises slipping beneath the pale porcelain eyelids as Han Geng gently traced his thumb across his cheekbones. “Get into bed Siw-Shiyuan, I'm not going anywhere, I'll make sure you're safe.” Han Geng added, cringing as he almost called his partner by his Korean name, something which Siwon had come to hate in recent events, claiming the Chinese name was more personal between them and wasn't tainted by some psychopath's lips.
“Y-You promise?” Siwon stammered as he rolled, shuffled and pushed backwards and around until he was in-line with the blankets he had originally been hidden beneath, smiling gently as Han Geng pulled the blankets over his frame and tucked him in, nodding his head in answer to the question, holding his pinky finger out as extra backup, before Siwon nodded in acceptance and closed his eyes, one hand moving from around his plushies to intertwine with Han Geng's own fingers, still slightly cold from the biting wind outside.
Watching with amazement as Siwon virtually sank away into an unconscious state somewhere between sleep and passed out from exhaustion, Han Geng found himself wondering just how long the younger male had spent beneath the table attempting to sleep yet unable to shake away his old, almost learned familiar sensation of paranoia, the Chinese male trying not to let his own emotions take over as he peered down at the pale, sweat shined, slightly gaunt features of the once exuberant male who now was so terrified of his own house that he refused to go anywhere in the building without Han Geng's guidance or his intensive covering of tables, chairs and sheets to protect his whereabouts.
The whole thing had begun over a year ago, back when Siwon had lived with his parents, yet due to his large schedules had spent most of the nights few precious hours sleep curled around Han Geng in the main groups dormitories, Siwon had been feeling weird for quite sometime before he voiced his worries to his Chinese partner almost cautiously as if he was expecting him to laugh or taunt him for them, yet when Siwon had put forward the idea that someone was following him, Han Geng did neither of the two, and instead proceeded to drag him forcefully to Leeteuk's and Kangin's room where he forced the muscular Christian to retell his theory and experiences of the burning eyes, disgusted shivers, exposed uncomfortable feelings creeping up his neck and the distinct notion that someone was lurking in his shadow wherever he turned. Not long after that, Siwon received a note, in amongst all his traditional fan-mail which he sat and painstakingly read through with a wistful smile on his face, however the moment Siwon opened the note, Han Geng, who had been opposite him with Ryeowook who was helping translate some of the Korean phrases the Chinese male still couldn't comprehend, knew instantly that something was wrong as Siwon's face paled, plummeted and twitched before he all but screamed and threw the note away as if it burnt him, Han Geng barely registering Ryeowook rushing to Siwon's side as he reached for the note and felt his own chest tighten at the neatly typed words across the paper.
I'm watching you.
After that, the entire group had been on red alert. Not one member let any mail near Siwon's sight without having thoroughly checked through it and declared it safe first, the notes that still turned up on the odd occasion, being swiftly set fire to by Kangin's lighter with little thought, Leeteuk not even protesting at the unsafe use of a naked flame in the middle of the dormitory as the evidence of someone's vendetta against Siwon disappeared into flaking, fragile ash. Han Geng had found himself sticking to Siwon's side more often then not as the notes kept arriving in abundance, Siwon's feelings of being stared at increasing every day, yet were apparently manageable with Han Geng at his side, even to the point they started to fade and the Chinese male was naively about to start hoping the strange stalker was about to give up, having deemed the effort to get past the fourteen other outraged males as too much work, when another note had arrived addressed to both himself and Siwon, and Han Geng had opened it with trembling, reluctant fingers as the other thirteen members crowded around the armchair he was perched in while Siwon was napping in his bedroom, only to feel Heechul's hands wrap around his shoulders in case he fainted as the colour drained rapidly out of his face, barely registering as Leeteuk took the letter to read for himself.
Your little foreign lap dog can't hide you from me. Not now. Not ever.
Not long after that, Siwon had declared enough was enough and refused to let anyone keep an eye on him, he was a grown adult, with enough muscle to spare and the skill to protect himself should the occasion rise, he had no reason to be afraid of some little pathetic notes and the young Korean had proceeded to move out of his parent's house and into an apartment of his own, not far from the dorms in case he was needed or had schedules, yet far enough to be considered independent from everything. Han Geng had gone with Siwon to view the place before the younger male had agreed to buy it, and the Chinese male had admitted on the way back to the dormitory that he had been amazed and drawn in by the designer, yet still simple surroundings, the whole house on one level with a small attic space above which could be perfect for storage, two bedrooms, fully furnished en-suite bathroom, as well as a normal bathroom, kitchen and combined lounge and dining area and the pair of them had joked about how homely the place was and how they should move in together and start a little family.
Realising Siwon was in a deep sleep, Han Geng felt his curiosity growing as he realised he hadn't had chance to fully check the damage out around the house since the incident that had landed Siwon in his current state of mind, the Chinese male barely leaving the living area or under the table whenever he came round as Siwon refused to leave in case his almost cemented paranoia still had a valid cause. He knew he shouldn't, he had promised Siwon that he would be there with him while he slept, and it almost shattered his soul as he acknowledged that, that was the only reason Siwon had been able to fall asleep in the first place, but there was something calling out to him to find out just what had gone on in the past few months or so since he had moved into the apartment.
Carefully dislodging his fingers from between Siwon's, Han Geng rolled out from under the table and swiftly padded his way out of the maze area and down the hallway towards the main bedroom that from the looks of it, hadn't been used in a very long time, if the slight layer of accumulated dust and still scattered clothing was any indication, his eyes quickly panning away from the master bedroom to peer curiously in at the guest bedroom which was actually used as a storage room, having originally been designed as a room where any of the group members could sleep if they stayed over, yet it had soon become storage when the only member that stayed over had been himself, and he had always crawled into Siwon's bed beside him. Moving away from the bedrooms for a moment, Han Geng glanced through the spare room that had been transformed into a mini home gym and training studio before peeking his head carefully around the bathroom door, not exactly sure what he was expecting to find in the slightly dusty, yet seemingly otherwise perfectly fine house.
Stepping back into the master bedroom, Han Geng paused for a moment to allow himself some time to absorb the soft scent that still lingered from Siwon's cologne and general smell, the Chinese male resisting the urge to bury himself in the pillows still on the bed in a hopes the scent would be stronger and mixed with the tantalising coconut of Siwon's shampoo, the combination of which was secretly his favourite scent in the world, not that he'd ever admit that in an interview. However, as he spotted the small hole in the ceiling that was so small he wouldn't have noticed it had he not already known it existed, Han Geng found his fond memories of how Siwon smelled when he was curled up against the muscular chest fall through the floor as he remembered why his partner was a quivering wreck underneath the dining room table, the Chinese male barely pausing to grab a torch from the bedside table where the Police had clearly left it, before he was pulling himself up the small ladder into the attic space with a small infuriated growl, allowing his anger to overrule his urge to throw up.
Originally management, as well as the whole group, himself included, had been wary about the idea of Siwon moving in on his own, especially with the seemingly persistent attitude of whoever was sending him the threatening messages, but when two weeks in, Siwon hadn't received a single note or shuddered at the now traditional feel of eyes burning unperturbed into his skin, Han Geng had felt himself breathing a huge sigh of relief as everything seemed to be settling down into something akin to normality once more. However, his feelings of elated happiness at the sight of a relaxed, excited, expressive Siwon once more had been short lived when the younger male had about a month ago, suddenly, inexplicably started making excuses to stay over at the dormitories once more, claiming that schedules were too early for him to bother leaving, it was too late to go home now, he wanted to spend time with them all despite seeing them all day at training schedules.
Shining the torch almost nervously around the darkened gloom of the attic area he was now crouched in, Han Geng felt his eyes narrow as he spotted small beams of light peeking through the floor from the illuminated rooms below, the space not big enough for him to even crouch in, meaning the Chinese male found himself crawling on all fours to the beam furthest away from the attic door, hand swiftly covering his mouth in horror as he squinted and found himself peering down over the living area, the hole directly over the sofa and as he pulled back slightly, Han Geng found himself pushing his hand tighter against his lips to hold back his wave of nausea as he spotted the small neatly traced pencil markings spelling out “Lounge” curled around the rim of the viewpoint.
It had been three days after Siwon's mass of excuses and stays at the dormitory that Han Geng had gotten sick of waking up at three in the morning freezing cold and distinctly alone in bed, only to find Siwon perched on the windowsill peering out into the early morning twilight almost as if he were searching for something and the Chinese male had finally snapped and demanded to know the truth as to why Siwon had suddenly returned to the dormitories. Yet as Siwon explained how the burning feeling against his skin as he was watched endlessly had returned once more, disturbingly, in his own home and not out in the open, Han Geng had once again dragged him to the others however, they had merely put it down to it being left over paranoia from before and told Siwon not to worry about it. Of course, Siwon had agreed and gone back home, but every night Han Geng had received a phone call begging for him to come round as that familiar sensation was creeping through his system with endless tendrils until the young Korean was almost on the brink of losing it.
Peering back down through the hole in the attic floor, Han Geng found himself remembering how often on those nights when he sought to comfort Siwon's paranoia, the pair of them had lay curled up against the sofa cushions, limbs tangled intimately, yet innocently, Siwon's head over Han Geng's chest, listening to the rhythmic thud of his heartbeat as the Chinese male played with the end of his hair, and the Chinese male swiftly moved back as he felt the lead horror sink in as he realised their most private and personal moments had been easily visible from that single point. Spinning away from the hole over the lounge area, Han Geng moved around the attic once more, trying to ignore the sickening tremble in his limbs as he found another hole over the kitchen, as well as three more over the main bathroom, guest bedroom and gym area, yet the Chinese male couldn't help the small choke of horror from escaping him as he found himself peering down through the next hole and directly over the bed in Siwon's master bedroom.
It had been on one of those nights when Han Geng had been around to help calm Siwon's supposed over-active imagination that the pair of them, originally having been curled up together across the sofa had found themselves careering through into the bedroom, hands ruthlessly tugging and ripping at each others clothing, lips, tongues and teeth clashing, sliding and nipping at every inch of exposed skin that appeared, until Siwon had pushed him down across the bed, before settling perfectly between his toned, tanned spread thighs, slick fingers curling into his entrance, drawing loud, unrestricted moans of pleasurable pain from his lips amongst the rambling Chinese pleads, something which had quickly morphed into cussing as Siwon had prepared himself and slid into him with practised precision, legs locking around the Korean's strong hips, fingernails tracing red welts down the heavily muscular spine as they'd rocked together in perfected ease, hands intertwining as they reached their climax with sharp cries of each others names.
Jumping backwards in his haste to escape the horrifying realisation that their most intimate acts had been witnessed against their will and knowledge, Han Geng almost yelped in shock as he bumped into something solid and plastic, almost smashing it out of fear that it was going to attack him before he felt his eyes widen as he found himself staring at a phone, land-line, which was more then likely connected to Siwon's down below and the Chinese male had to shut his eyes for a moment as his frame swayed from the information it was being overloaded with, snippets of his own phone calls with Siwon swimming round his head, declarations of love, playful flirting, and private, serious discussion about something which otherwise would have remained hush hush just between the group members, Han Geng almost curious as to how much the listener had heard of not only his own conversations, but those with Ryeowook and Leeteuk who both called Siwon almost habitually to talk, get advice or discuss important plans.
It had only been a week or so ago when Han Geng had received a phone call himself from Ryeowook, the Eternal Maknae having left the Dormitory barely ten minutes before hand declaring that he was off to go see Siwon as himself and the elder male had planned to spend the afternoon pointlessly baking in the muscular male's otherwise virtually unused kitchen area. Yet Han Geng had barely settled down to watch some strange drama with Leeteuk and Heechul when his phone had buzzed against his pocket and the Chinese male had found the colour draining from his system as Ryeowook stuttered and panted and spluttered down the phone in panic, before Shindong had taken the phone away from Han Geng and soothed Ryeowook down enough to extract from him that Siwon had been attacked in his own home and he himself had caught the guy who had done so.
Within minutes the whole group, as well as the management and Police forces had crashed their way into Siwon's apartment, only to find Ryeowook curled up against the floor a trembling mess, still clutching to his mobile phone in one hand and a rolling pin in the other, which was later on revealed to have been the tiny male's weapon of choice against his Hyung's attacker from the collection he'd brought with him to bake with. As Shindong had helped Ryeowook to his feet, for the third time, the first two times the Eternal Maknae having collapsed bonelessly back to the floor, Han Geng had stormed through to find Siwon barely conscious, bleeding and disturbingly only half clothed, the unconscious, grime coated frame of a bulky, burly male some small distance away, temple bleeding from where Ryeowook's tiny wrists had slammed the metal pin against him.
Crawling over to the final hole in the attic floor, Han Geng felt himself actually gag as he found himself peering down into Siwon's en-suite bathroom, more specifically, the shower, somewhere where no one but himself and Siwon should ever have to liberty to see, especially not when Siwon was in the shower, exposing all those tantalising, incredibly seductive muscles, dripping with crystal droplets of water, clinging to every slither of perfect skin, and slicking his ebony tresses back against his scalp making the Korean resemble some form of water God in all his glory. Deciding he'd seen enough of the sick bastard's view, Han Geng quickly shuffled and slid his way back to the attic entrance and leapt lightly down the stairs and back into Siwon's bedroom, ignoring the extra wave of nausea as he realised the man had trespassed on the most private of rooms every time he'd lived his warped little fantasies and if it hadn't been for the sudden whimpering call of his name from the main room, Han Geng was sure he would have smashed his fist into something, just in an attempt to remove some of the inner emotional turmoil floating through his system.
When the Police had took the guy away and Siwon had been taken to hospital, Han Geng had found his anger and horror rising in equally, scarily large amounts as the Police revealed that the stalker who had originally been sending Siwon notes and following him around had found out the Korean was moving in on his own and upon discovering that the attic would remain empty instead of for storage, had proceeded to move himself in, cutting minute holes into the floor above the rooms, written each room against the side for reference and proceeded to watch Siwon's every single move from above his very head, everything from his morning routine of shower, exercise and black coffee, to the gentle and tender hours when Han Geng himself had been there, something that had, had the Chinese male himself shivering in disgust and feeling horrible exposed. The male had admitted to everything, even how he had gotten himself off watching Siwon and Han Geng or spying on Siwon in the shower, and he had been sent to jail with little problem, but the damage had been done, Siwon was now terrified of his own house, yet too scared to even leave and face the outside world, and so the Korean had developed a mass maze of sheet tunnels and hiding places where he could be safe, secure and sound in the knowledge that he wasn't visible to the holes in the ceiling that they were still waiting to be covered up by a building official.
“Shiyuan!” Han Geng cried sliding on his knees and careering back under the table as the cries of his name became even more frantic, before he was thrown backwards across the floor as Siwon dived at him, sobbing almost hysterically, so un-Siwon-like it was almost terrifying, before he wrapped his arms around the hysterical male, peppering kisses along the strong jawline, whispering gentle words of apologies and soothing against the shell of his ear. “I'm sorry, I was just in the bedroom.” Han Geng added, not liking the fact he was lying to his partner, yet not wanting to admit to the clearly fragile male that he had been up where the man who had ruined his life had lurked for God only knows how long.
“I-I thought you'd left me.” Siwon choked, fingers sliding beneath the loose fabric of Han Geng's shirt to curl hot digits around his ribs in a desperate attempt to convince himself that the Chinese male was real and very much there, anything else he'd been about to sob lost in his throat as Han Geng tilted his head up from where it was buried in his chest and gently pushed their lips together, tongue lapping gently at the crease of the plump pair, which Siwon parted with a small surrendering whimper, visibly shivering as Han Geng rolled them over so he was once again hovering over the younger male.
“You're safe now Shiyuan, no one is up there. The only person here who can watch you is me.” Han Geng breathed as Siwon wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him down against him, his own lips moving to butterfly across the Chinese male's throat as he spoke, clamping over the vibrating Adam's apple for a moment before dipping to nip at the defined clavicle. “How about you come back to the dorms ah? There's no holes there. You'll be safe.” Han Geng suggested, trying to keep his sentence coherent as Siwon desperately bucked his hips into his own.
Yet as Siwon nodded in agreement, eyes peering up at him in silent request, Han Geng found himself forgetting about the move back home for the moment as he slipped Siwon's t-shirt over his head and set about pushing the paranoia from his partner's mind and replacing the distinct familiar sensation of burning eyes watching him, with the blissfully mind-blanking delight of pleasure.
Permanently.
And this is the first one i've written.
I...apologise for it...It's just...written...i didn't read it back, so i don't know if it's any good.
It's INCREDIBLY late here...and I apologise if its absolutely rubbish.
It fails...
Title: I Can See You.
Author: linnadhiel_x
Claim: Siwon x Han Geng
Band/Pairing: Super Junior, SiHan.
Prompt: #13 - Familiar Sensations.
Rating: R
Warnings: Angst, Slight AU, Stalking, Voyeurism (Not of a nice variety), Hints of sex, emotional and psychological damage.
Summary: Tucking the end of the sheet under itself leaving the side of the table exposed, Han Geng carefully crawled under the large, eight seater table and sat on his shins against one of the table legs, waiting for Siwon to move towards him, trying to ignore the sharp cracking of his heart as he watched the wide, yet scrutinising eyes rake over his frame from behind trembling folded up limbs, resembling nothing of the once bright, confident yet humble devoted man he had fallen in love with all those years ago.
Han Geng winced slightly in embarrassment as he realised he'd been standing on the doorstep to Siwon's apartment for the past five minutes staring, with an ever growing mass of lead guilt dragging the base of his stomach further into the pull of gravity, at the freshly installed set of three double setting locks in a neat precision on the Chinese male's eye line, despite the fact there was a perfectly fine, and freshly changed lock already situated beneath the door handle. Yet the Chinese male's expression only darkened as he pulled the small key chain from his jeans pocket and peered at the set of four colour coordinated silver keys shining in the soft light drifting through from the sun setting on the horizon, the knot of helplessness tightening ruthlessly around his heart until his blood thumped against his eardrums as he knew without testing that he would need all four keys to unlock the doorway regardless of the fact Siwon knew he was due around.
Rapping his knuckles four times in a steady concession against the middle panel of the doorway, trying to ignore the hastily scratched sign at the side of the door frame which up until recently had declared the property belonged to Choi Siwon, Han Geng swallowed before kicking the base of the doorway lightly, knocking another three times before ringing the door bell twice, each ring being counted for five seconds before he removed his finger and pulled the keys back into view, rather thankful that Ryeowook had, had the sense to colour coordinate them before hand meaning he could swiftly unlock the protective bolts in quick procession and not break the special greeting himself and Siwon had devised so the Korean would know exactly who was trying to get into his apartment and not freak out when the Chinese male visited.
“Shiyuan?” Han Geng called leaning close to the smooth, red gloss wood of the younger male's door to finish off his weird introduction of sorts, knowing that Siwon wouldn't be happy until he'd spoken. “Shiyuan it's me. Can you open the bolts?”
Despite the fact they had a special greeting and all the locks to keep unwanted intruders at bay, Han Geng still found himself waiting on the doorstep as he waited for Siwon to remove the final barrier between the Chinese male and the apartment, the younger male having still not felt safe enough with the locks on the outside and had insisted that he get a bolt and chain for the inside so if someone did try to get in, their efforts would be hindered. Hearing a small tap, tap, tap of cautious, yet almost excited feet, Han Geng listened carefully as Siwon pulled the bolt back with a click of metal, before doing the same with the chain, the Chinese male waiting till he'd heard Siwon stomp off in a whirl of muscle back to the lounge before pushing open the door like they'd originally agreed.
“Shiyuan? Where are you hiding?” Han Geng called after kicking off his shoes in the hallway and padding through to the main part of the apartment, feeling almost like he was playing Hide and Seek with a child, not trying to locate his long term partner, a feeling that only increased as he rounded the corner into the lounge and joint dining area hidden beneath the mass of strategically placed furniture, all draped with endless masses of sheets and blankets the Korean had dug out from one of his many unpacked boxes still piled up in the spare guest bedroom three doors down the corridor behind him, the whole thing looked little more then an incredibly elaborate den that the Chinese male had often attempted to make as a child with his friends, spending hours at a time curled up beneath the four dining chairs draped over with a sheet like some sort of slightly off shaped mini wigwam. “Shiyuan?” Han Geng all but sang as he stepped around the mass of almost tunnel like systems leading from the area down into the kitchen and off back towards the hallway and the other rooms, aiming for the dining table, the centre piece in the maze of sheets and chairs, trying not to shiver too visibly as he could feel Siwon's eyes already burning into him from wherever he hid, something which even after almost two months of the same scenario, he still found slightly daunting.
Dropping down onto his knees, Han Geng carefully and cautiously lifted the end of the sheet over the dining table, knowing he'd hit the jackpot when he heard the distinct shuffle backwards away from his fingers, underlying the slight panicked whimper of shock at his sudden appearance, the Chinese male continuing with his task, slowly revealing himself to the mass of curled limbs cowering beneath the dining table, knowing that if he stopped and moved away it would only make Siwon worse. Tucking the end of the sheet under itself leaving the side of the table exposed, Han Geng carefully crawled under the large, eight seater table and sat on his shins against one of the table legs, waiting for Siwon to move towards him, trying to ignore the sharp cracking of his heart as he watched the wide, yet scrutinising eyes rake over his frame from behind trembling folded up limbs, resembling nothing of the once bright, confident yet humble devoted man he had fallen in love with all those years ago.
“G-Gege?” Hearing the soft, croaking vocals from the corner opposite, Han Geng merely nodded in response before holding his arms open in a silent invite as Siwon hastily rolled his curled form forward onto all fours before he crawled swiftly across towards his Hyung, Han Geng barely able to un-tuck his legs from beneath him to sit cross legged before Siwon had crawled up into his lap and wrapped his long, slender fingers around the collar flaps of his shirt as his legs did the same around his waist, his hands only pausing to pull the sheet back down over the table so they were completely hidden from view once more.
“Shhh...Shiyuan. It's okay, I'm here now.” Han Geng soothed as the mass of limbs curled around him began to tremble with the repressed emotions of being alone with no-one to comfort him in so long, which in reality had only been about six hours. The Chinese male didn't even bother to ask about the mass of maze-like tunnels and hideouts that now made up the younger male's living area, which he himself had painstakingly taken down the day before last when Siwon had declared he'd like to try and live without them, but he couldn't be angry at the young Korean, he had been rather shocked when Siwon had suggested removing his safe haven, Han Geng having assumed it was far too early in the younger male's recovery to think like that.
“M-Mianhae.” Siwon muttered against the curve where his neck met his shoulder, the younger male's face pressed hotly against his skin, harsh, panting puffs of warm air sliding from between his plump lips to caress at the Chinese male's jawline, Han Geng finding himself unable to prevent the small smile crossing his lips as he realised in any other situation the whole thing would have been quite pleasurable, especially with Siwon essentially straddled across his legs, and sat on his crotch. “I promised myself I wouldn't get like this again.”
“It's alright. You feeling a bit better now?” Han Geng queried, before smiling as Siwon nodded against him, pushing away the small annoying spark in the back of his head that reminded he knew full well Siwon was lying and that he wasn't feeling better at all, that little voice doing nothing but causing his own chest to tighten in pain at how little he could do to help his partner. “This looks comfy Shiyuan.” Han Geng added with a small light chuckle in an attempt to lighten his partner's spirits as his eyes panned across the small collection of spare blankets, pillows, cushions and the small hugging Panda and Lion cubs plushy they had bought each other as a joke when they'd first started dating, and which Ryeowook had sown together one anniversary claiming it was to permanently join the pair of them together as well. Siwon had clearly been using the area to sleep in again, or at least, attempt to sleep in.
Nodding slightly, Siwon sighed and slipped rather fluidly off Han Geng's lap to lay back and sprawl across the floor, head just about reaching the plushies, which he quickly snatched up and held close to his chest as he peered unblinking up at the underside of the dining table, ignoring the confused blink and still extended arms of the Chinese male who hadn't been expecting him to move away, unable to prevent a small twitch of a smile, nothing like his trademark large dimpled one, spreading across his face as Han Geng quickly crawled over so he was hovering above him, blocking his view of the table wood, features schooled into a confused yet thoughtful expression.
“Shiyuan, you look shattered baby. Maybe you should get some sleep.” Han Geng breathed, shifting his weight to one hand as the other moved to brush the unkempt short spikes of ebony hair out of the male's face, fingertips rubbing gently at the silky ends until Siwon tilted his head up so his cheek was cupped against Han Geng's palm, the large onyx irises slipping beneath the pale porcelain eyelids as Han Geng gently traced his thumb across his cheekbones. “Get into bed Siw-Shiyuan, I'm not going anywhere, I'll make sure you're safe.” Han Geng added, cringing as he almost called his partner by his Korean name, something which Siwon had come to hate in recent events, claiming the Chinese name was more personal between them and wasn't tainted by some psychopath's lips.
“Y-You promise?” Siwon stammered as he rolled, shuffled and pushed backwards and around until he was in-line with the blankets he had originally been hidden beneath, smiling gently as Han Geng pulled the blankets over his frame and tucked him in, nodding his head in answer to the question, holding his pinky finger out as extra backup, before Siwon nodded in acceptance and closed his eyes, one hand moving from around his plushies to intertwine with Han Geng's own fingers, still slightly cold from the biting wind outside.
Watching with amazement as Siwon virtually sank away into an unconscious state somewhere between sleep and passed out from exhaustion, Han Geng found himself wondering just how long the younger male had spent beneath the table attempting to sleep yet unable to shake away his old, almost learned familiar sensation of paranoia, the Chinese male trying not to let his own emotions take over as he peered down at the pale, sweat shined, slightly gaunt features of the once exuberant male who now was so terrified of his own house that he refused to go anywhere in the building without Han Geng's guidance or his intensive covering of tables, chairs and sheets to protect his whereabouts.
The whole thing had begun over a year ago, back when Siwon had lived with his parents, yet due to his large schedules had spent most of the nights few precious hours sleep curled around Han Geng in the main groups dormitories, Siwon had been feeling weird for quite sometime before he voiced his worries to his Chinese partner almost cautiously as if he was expecting him to laugh or taunt him for them, yet when Siwon had put forward the idea that someone was following him, Han Geng did neither of the two, and instead proceeded to drag him forcefully to Leeteuk's and Kangin's room where he forced the muscular Christian to retell his theory and experiences of the burning eyes, disgusted shivers, exposed uncomfortable feelings creeping up his neck and the distinct notion that someone was lurking in his shadow wherever he turned. Not long after that, Siwon received a note, in amongst all his traditional fan-mail which he sat and painstakingly read through with a wistful smile on his face, however the moment Siwon opened the note, Han Geng, who had been opposite him with Ryeowook who was helping translate some of the Korean phrases the Chinese male still couldn't comprehend, knew instantly that something was wrong as Siwon's face paled, plummeted and twitched before he all but screamed and threw the note away as if it burnt him, Han Geng barely registering Ryeowook rushing to Siwon's side as he reached for the note and felt his own chest tighten at the neatly typed words across the paper.
I'm watching you.
After that, the entire group had been on red alert. Not one member let any mail near Siwon's sight without having thoroughly checked through it and declared it safe first, the notes that still turned up on the odd occasion, being swiftly set fire to by Kangin's lighter with little thought, Leeteuk not even protesting at the unsafe use of a naked flame in the middle of the dormitory as the evidence of someone's vendetta against Siwon disappeared into flaking, fragile ash. Han Geng had found himself sticking to Siwon's side more often then not as the notes kept arriving in abundance, Siwon's feelings of being stared at increasing every day, yet were apparently manageable with Han Geng at his side, even to the point they started to fade and the Chinese male was naively about to start hoping the strange stalker was about to give up, having deemed the effort to get past the fourteen other outraged males as too much work, when another note had arrived addressed to both himself and Siwon, and Han Geng had opened it with trembling, reluctant fingers as the other thirteen members crowded around the armchair he was perched in while Siwon was napping in his bedroom, only to feel Heechul's hands wrap around his shoulders in case he fainted as the colour drained rapidly out of his face, barely registering as Leeteuk took the letter to read for himself.
Your little foreign lap dog can't hide you from me. Not now. Not ever.
Not long after that, Siwon had declared enough was enough and refused to let anyone keep an eye on him, he was a grown adult, with enough muscle to spare and the skill to protect himself should the occasion rise, he had no reason to be afraid of some little pathetic notes and the young Korean had proceeded to move out of his parent's house and into an apartment of his own, not far from the dorms in case he was needed or had schedules, yet far enough to be considered independent from everything. Han Geng had gone with Siwon to view the place before the younger male had agreed to buy it, and the Chinese male had admitted on the way back to the dormitory that he had been amazed and drawn in by the designer, yet still simple surroundings, the whole house on one level with a small attic space above which could be perfect for storage, two bedrooms, fully furnished en-suite bathroom, as well as a normal bathroom, kitchen and combined lounge and dining area and the pair of them had joked about how homely the place was and how they should move in together and start a little family.
Realising Siwon was in a deep sleep, Han Geng felt his curiosity growing as he realised he hadn't had chance to fully check the damage out around the house since the incident that had landed Siwon in his current state of mind, the Chinese male barely leaving the living area or under the table whenever he came round as Siwon refused to leave in case his almost cemented paranoia still had a valid cause. He knew he shouldn't, he had promised Siwon that he would be there with him while he slept, and it almost shattered his soul as he acknowledged that, that was the only reason Siwon had been able to fall asleep in the first place, but there was something calling out to him to find out just what had gone on in the past few months or so since he had moved into the apartment.
Carefully dislodging his fingers from between Siwon's, Han Geng rolled out from under the table and swiftly padded his way out of the maze area and down the hallway towards the main bedroom that from the looks of it, hadn't been used in a very long time, if the slight layer of accumulated dust and still scattered clothing was any indication, his eyes quickly panning away from the master bedroom to peer curiously in at the guest bedroom which was actually used as a storage room, having originally been designed as a room where any of the group members could sleep if they stayed over, yet it had soon become storage when the only member that stayed over had been himself, and he had always crawled into Siwon's bed beside him. Moving away from the bedrooms for a moment, Han Geng glanced through the spare room that had been transformed into a mini home gym and training studio before peeking his head carefully around the bathroom door, not exactly sure what he was expecting to find in the slightly dusty, yet seemingly otherwise perfectly fine house.
Stepping back into the master bedroom, Han Geng paused for a moment to allow himself some time to absorb the soft scent that still lingered from Siwon's cologne and general smell, the Chinese male resisting the urge to bury himself in the pillows still on the bed in a hopes the scent would be stronger and mixed with the tantalising coconut of Siwon's shampoo, the combination of which was secretly his favourite scent in the world, not that he'd ever admit that in an interview. However, as he spotted the small hole in the ceiling that was so small he wouldn't have noticed it had he not already known it existed, Han Geng found his fond memories of how Siwon smelled when he was curled up against the muscular chest fall through the floor as he remembered why his partner was a quivering wreck underneath the dining room table, the Chinese male barely pausing to grab a torch from the bedside table where the Police had clearly left it, before he was pulling himself up the small ladder into the attic space with a small infuriated growl, allowing his anger to overrule his urge to throw up.
Originally management, as well as the whole group, himself included, had been wary about the idea of Siwon moving in on his own, especially with the seemingly persistent attitude of whoever was sending him the threatening messages, but when two weeks in, Siwon hadn't received a single note or shuddered at the now traditional feel of eyes burning unperturbed into his skin, Han Geng had felt himself breathing a huge sigh of relief as everything seemed to be settling down into something akin to normality once more. However, his feelings of elated happiness at the sight of a relaxed, excited, expressive Siwon once more had been short lived when the younger male had about a month ago, suddenly, inexplicably started making excuses to stay over at the dormitories once more, claiming that schedules were too early for him to bother leaving, it was too late to go home now, he wanted to spend time with them all despite seeing them all day at training schedules.
Shining the torch almost nervously around the darkened gloom of the attic area he was now crouched in, Han Geng felt his eyes narrow as he spotted small beams of light peeking through the floor from the illuminated rooms below, the space not big enough for him to even crouch in, meaning the Chinese male found himself crawling on all fours to the beam furthest away from the attic door, hand swiftly covering his mouth in horror as he squinted and found himself peering down over the living area, the hole directly over the sofa and as he pulled back slightly, Han Geng found himself pushing his hand tighter against his lips to hold back his wave of nausea as he spotted the small neatly traced pencil markings spelling out “Lounge” curled around the rim of the viewpoint.
It had been three days after Siwon's mass of excuses and stays at the dormitory that Han Geng had gotten sick of waking up at three in the morning freezing cold and distinctly alone in bed, only to find Siwon perched on the windowsill peering out into the early morning twilight almost as if he were searching for something and the Chinese male had finally snapped and demanded to know the truth as to why Siwon had suddenly returned to the dormitories. Yet as Siwon explained how the burning feeling against his skin as he was watched endlessly had returned once more, disturbingly, in his own home and not out in the open, Han Geng had once again dragged him to the others however, they had merely put it down to it being left over paranoia from before and told Siwon not to worry about it. Of course, Siwon had agreed and gone back home, but every night Han Geng had received a phone call begging for him to come round as that familiar sensation was creeping through his system with endless tendrils until the young Korean was almost on the brink of losing it.
Peering back down through the hole in the attic floor, Han Geng found himself remembering how often on those nights when he sought to comfort Siwon's paranoia, the pair of them had lay curled up against the sofa cushions, limbs tangled intimately, yet innocently, Siwon's head over Han Geng's chest, listening to the rhythmic thud of his heartbeat as the Chinese male played with the end of his hair, and the Chinese male swiftly moved back as he felt the lead horror sink in as he realised their most private and personal moments had been easily visible from that single point. Spinning away from the hole over the lounge area, Han Geng moved around the attic once more, trying to ignore the sickening tremble in his limbs as he found another hole over the kitchen, as well as three more over the main bathroom, guest bedroom and gym area, yet the Chinese male couldn't help the small choke of horror from escaping him as he found himself peering down through the next hole and directly over the bed in Siwon's master bedroom.
It had been on one of those nights when Han Geng had been around to help calm Siwon's supposed over-active imagination that the pair of them, originally having been curled up together across the sofa had found themselves careering through into the bedroom, hands ruthlessly tugging and ripping at each others clothing, lips, tongues and teeth clashing, sliding and nipping at every inch of exposed skin that appeared, until Siwon had pushed him down across the bed, before settling perfectly between his toned, tanned spread thighs, slick fingers curling into his entrance, drawing loud, unrestricted moans of pleasurable pain from his lips amongst the rambling Chinese pleads, something which had quickly morphed into cussing as Siwon had prepared himself and slid into him with practised precision, legs locking around the Korean's strong hips, fingernails tracing red welts down the heavily muscular spine as they'd rocked together in perfected ease, hands intertwining as they reached their climax with sharp cries of each others names.
Jumping backwards in his haste to escape the horrifying realisation that their most intimate acts had been witnessed against their will and knowledge, Han Geng almost yelped in shock as he bumped into something solid and plastic, almost smashing it out of fear that it was going to attack him before he felt his eyes widen as he found himself staring at a phone, land-line, which was more then likely connected to Siwon's down below and the Chinese male had to shut his eyes for a moment as his frame swayed from the information it was being overloaded with, snippets of his own phone calls with Siwon swimming round his head, declarations of love, playful flirting, and private, serious discussion about something which otherwise would have remained hush hush just between the group members, Han Geng almost curious as to how much the listener had heard of not only his own conversations, but those with Ryeowook and Leeteuk who both called Siwon almost habitually to talk, get advice or discuss important plans.
It had only been a week or so ago when Han Geng had received a phone call himself from Ryeowook, the Eternal Maknae having left the Dormitory barely ten minutes before hand declaring that he was off to go see Siwon as himself and the elder male had planned to spend the afternoon pointlessly baking in the muscular male's otherwise virtually unused kitchen area. Yet Han Geng had barely settled down to watch some strange drama with Leeteuk and Heechul when his phone had buzzed against his pocket and the Chinese male had found the colour draining from his system as Ryeowook stuttered and panted and spluttered down the phone in panic, before Shindong had taken the phone away from Han Geng and soothed Ryeowook down enough to extract from him that Siwon had been attacked in his own home and he himself had caught the guy who had done so.
Within minutes the whole group, as well as the management and Police forces had crashed their way into Siwon's apartment, only to find Ryeowook curled up against the floor a trembling mess, still clutching to his mobile phone in one hand and a rolling pin in the other, which was later on revealed to have been the tiny male's weapon of choice against his Hyung's attacker from the collection he'd brought with him to bake with. As Shindong had helped Ryeowook to his feet, for the third time, the first two times the Eternal Maknae having collapsed bonelessly back to the floor, Han Geng had stormed through to find Siwon barely conscious, bleeding and disturbingly only half clothed, the unconscious, grime coated frame of a bulky, burly male some small distance away, temple bleeding from where Ryeowook's tiny wrists had slammed the metal pin against him.
Crawling over to the final hole in the attic floor, Han Geng felt himself actually gag as he found himself peering down into Siwon's en-suite bathroom, more specifically, the shower, somewhere where no one but himself and Siwon should ever have to liberty to see, especially not when Siwon was in the shower, exposing all those tantalising, incredibly seductive muscles, dripping with crystal droplets of water, clinging to every slither of perfect skin, and slicking his ebony tresses back against his scalp making the Korean resemble some form of water God in all his glory. Deciding he'd seen enough of the sick bastard's view, Han Geng quickly shuffled and slid his way back to the attic entrance and leapt lightly down the stairs and back into Siwon's bedroom, ignoring the extra wave of nausea as he realised the man had trespassed on the most private of rooms every time he'd lived his warped little fantasies and if it hadn't been for the sudden whimpering call of his name from the main room, Han Geng was sure he would have smashed his fist into something, just in an attempt to remove some of the inner emotional turmoil floating through his system.
When the Police had took the guy away and Siwon had been taken to hospital, Han Geng had found his anger and horror rising in equally, scarily large amounts as the Police revealed that the stalker who had originally been sending Siwon notes and following him around had found out the Korean was moving in on his own and upon discovering that the attic would remain empty instead of for storage, had proceeded to move himself in, cutting minute holes into the floor above the rooms, written each room against the side for reference and proceeded to watch Siwon's every single move from above his very head, everything from his morning routine of shower, exercise and black coffee, to the gentle and tender hours when Han Geng himself had been there, something that had, had the Chinese male himself shivering in disgust and feeling horrible exposed. The male had admitted to everything, even how he had gotten himself off watching Siwon and Han Geng or spying on Siwon in the shower, and he had been sent to jail with little problem, but the damage had been done, Siwon was now terrified of his own house, yet too scared to even leave and face the outside world, and so the Korean had developed a mass maze of sheet tunnels and hiding places where he could be safe, secure and sound in the knowledge that he wasn't visible to the holes in the ceiling that they were still waiting to be covered up by a building official.
“Shiyuan!” Han Geng cried sliding on his knees and careering back under the table as the cries of his name became even more frantic, before he was thrown backwards across the floor as Siwon dived at him, sobbing almost hysterically, so un-Siwon-like it was almost terrifying, before he wrapped his arms around the hysterical male, peppering kisses along the strong jawline, whispering gentle words of apologies and soothing against the shell of his ear. “I'm sorry, I was just in the bedroom.” Han Geng added, not liking the fact he was lying to his partner, yet not wanting to admit to the clearly fragile male that he had been up where the man who had ruined his life had lurked for God only knows how long.
“I-I thought you'd left me.” Siwon choked, fingers sliding beneath the loose fabric of Han Geng's shirt to curl hot digits around his ribs in a desperate attempt to convince himself that the Chinese male was real and very much there, anything else he'd been about to sob lost in his throat as Han Geng tilted his head up from where it was buried in his chest and gently pushed their lips together, tongue lapping gently at the crease of the plump pair, which Siwon parted with a small surrendering whimper, visibly shivering as Han Geng rolled them over so he was once again hovering over the younger male.
“You're safe now Shiyuan, no one is up there. The only person here who can watch you is me.” Han Geng breathed as Siwon wrapped his arms around his neck and pulled him down against him, his own lips moving to butterfly across the Chinese male's throat as he spoke, clamping over the vibrating Adam's apple for a moment before dipping to nip at the defined clavicle. “How about you come back to the dorms ah? There's no holes there. You'll be safe.” Han Geng suggested, trying to keep his sentence coherent as Siwon desperately bucked his hips into his own.
Yet as Siwon nodded in agreement, eyes peering up at him in silent request, Han Geng found himself forgetting about the move back home for the moment as he slipped Siwon's t-shirt over his head and set about pushing the paranoia from his partner's mind and replacing the distinct familiar sensation of burning eyes watching him, with the blissfully mind-blanking delight of pleasure.
Permanently.