The Bucket List(movie), And my Thoughts on Death.
I just saw the Bucket List, Finally.
I had wanted to see it for the longest time now... 'Cause Morgan Freeman and Jack Nicholson are two of the best actors on my list.
Hn..
So I'm happy I got to see it
But I cried.. At the damn movie. >/
And I'm not sure why....
I always say to myself that I'm terrified at the aspect of death.
The thought of death scares me. Always has.
Even now, when I even think about it.....
...suddenly just...nothingness.
A nothingness that last forever.....
In my mind I picture it going black.... And then that being it.
Seeing nothing....feeling nothing.... hearing nothing, Forever.
Forever.
I guess thinking like that is what makes me so afraid.
I mean, everyone else doesn't think like that, right?
Religion insures that people don't think like I do.
Instead they have the religions teachings.
Such as...Heaven or Hell...
Reincarnation.
Or whatever else you might believe.
But me.....I may have a very vivid imagination,
But I can't realisitically say that I think that I'll go to heaven or hell or be reincarnated...
And actually BELIEVE it.
Is it my own lacking,
not being able to believe in anything?
Or....is it something else?
Am I a messed up person?
Or am i just being realistic?
I don't really know... But i'd rather live a more cushy life of believing that there is this wonderful place waiting for me when I die...
And I can think like that.
I picture it in my head.
I always tend to picture things in my head.
I remembering seeing a movie with Robin Williams.....
Where he died...but he went to this place that had people he knew there.
I don't remember the movie at all.....just the idea of waking up in this new place...
to live, after death.....
I always thought that was a good idea.
It would be nice if that was what really happened....
And yet.....
Whats there for a person as skeptical as me?
Is it really healthy to think the way I do?
To be so cynical and be afraid of death because I have the mindset that I'm just going to END and then thats it and nothing happens?
Is that what Atheism really is?
Geh.. I don't know.
I really don't....
And I'm too sore and tired to really care right now....
I've been doing running at dawn lately.
You know...as the sun comes up,
before it gets too hot...
And it hurts all over.
Whatever. I just hope I can keep it up and get back in shape...
Because I told myself I wanted to look as awesome as I feel.
And I feel pretty damn awesome....so I have a long way to go.
Well The credits on the movie are finishing, so I'll stop here.
My name is Keyesia Ann Beasley.
And in the moment that you took time to read this...
I have had control of your brain.
:3
<3
/Keyes/