Candid Camera
Attitude Report
Frankly my attitude is piss-poor right now. I grumpy and pissy... for no real reason. I am frusterated both with absolutely nothing and also for my frustration at nothing.
I woke up this morning unusally happy. That should have tipped me off, as I sometimes have been referred to as "difficult" in the morning. But this morning, I woke up, found myself awake enough, early enough to lie in bed and snuggle with Clem for a good 20 minutes. When I finally got out of bed, I easily got dressed, didn't forget anything, and walked to the bus listening to my favorite music.
"So, what went wrong," you ask.
I guess it started with the lack of my parfait... See, every morning I eat a yogurt parfait, with granola and strawberries. I am addicted. I love them. Sometimes I have two a day, but only one is needed. I love the chewy raisins with the yogurt. Anyway, today... no parfaits.. actually there was a very sad looking one that was obviously from yesterday, but nothing edible.
So I decided to go back to my former obsessive breakfast food, the cinnamon scone. I stood in line, pouting slightly, but reminding myself that sometimes habits are ok to break. As I thought that, one of the two remaining cinnamon scones was swooped up by an employee who decided that now was the time for a break. No problem, there was one more. That is, until the woman in front of me started asking about what different flavors of scones there was. The barista rattled them off, obviously confusing the woman who finally just sort of waved at one, MY SCONE, and said she would take that. She didn't even know what kind it was!!
I briefly thought of going to get the breakfast obsession previous to that, the lemon poppyseed muffin, but I didn't have time at that point. I settled for a marionberry coffee cake, which was great in taste and completely unsatisfying in emotional worth. It will never be my favorite, never.
I have tried to come out of the funk that resulted from that experience, but it has been to no avail. I spent much of my morning walk formulating how I would write this journal.
Once back at work, I found myself mired in a steady stream of confused people and aggrivating spreadsheets. After the second person that showed up for a meeting with someone on a floor they couldn't remember, with a job that they couldn't remember, that may or may not be in this building, whose name may or may not be steve, or katherine, but could you find them anyway please, I began to wonder if the security guards were having a laugh at my expense.
Was this an elaborate reality tv show that was set to measure my breaking point?
"How angry can we make her?"
Really, the idea is no worse than any other reality show.
Not even a carefully squirrelled away piece of godiva chocolate has helped. Neither has a picture of my kitten, sent to me by my roomie. Nor has the arrival of the one-inch buttons that I ordered to sell at my show tomorrow night. They look good though.
Let me know if you are missing 5 pizzas, because I can't figure out where they are going to, and the pizza guy is getting ready to take them back. Won't even leave them.
-K
Frankly my attitude is piss-poor right now. I grumpy and pissy... for no real reason. I am frusterated both with absolutely nothing and also for my frustration at nothing.
I woke up this morning unusally happy. That should have tipped me off, as I sometimes have been referred to as "difficult" in the morning. But this morning, I woke up, found myself awake enough, early enough to lie in bed and snuggle with Clem for a good 20 minutes. When I finally got out of bed, I easily got dressed, didn't forget anything, and walked to the bus listening to my favorite music.
"So, what went wrong," you ask.
I guess it started with the lack of my parfait... See, every morning I eat a yogurt parfait, with granola and strawberries. I am addicted. I love them. Sometimes I have two a day, but only one is needed. I love the chewy raisins with the yogurt. Anyway, today... no parfaits.. actually there was a very sad looking one that was obviously from yesterday, but nothing edible.
So I decided to go back to my former obsessive breakfast food, the cinnamon scone. I stood in line, pouting slightly, but reminding myself that sometimes habits are ok to break. As I thought that, one of the two remaining cinnamon scones was swooped up by an employee who decided that now was the time for a break. No problem, there was one more. That is, until the woman in front of me started asking about what different flavors of scones there was. The barista rattled them off, obviously confusing the woman who finally just sort of waved at one, MY SCONE, and said she would take that. She didn't even know what kind it was!!
I briefly thought of going to get the breakfast obsession previous to that, the lemon poppyseed muffin, but I didn't have time at that point. I settled for a marionberry coffee cake, which was great in taste and completely unsatisfying in emotional worth. It will never be my favorite, never.
I have tried to come out of the funk that resulted from that experience, but it has been to no avail. I spent much of my morning walk formulating how I would write this journal.
Once back at work, I found myself mired in a steady stream of confused people and aggrivating spreadsheets. After the second person that showed up for a meeting with someone on a floor they couldn't remember, with a job that they couldn't remember, that may or may not be in this building, whose name may or may not be steve, or katherine, but could you find them anyway please, I began to wonder if the security guards were having a laugh at my expense.
Was this an elaborate reality tv show that was set to measure my breaking point?
"How angry can we make her?"
Really, the idea is no worse than any other reality show.
Not even a carefully squirrelled away piece of godiva chocolate has helped. Neither has a picture of my kitten, sent to me by my roomie. Nor has the arrival of the one-inch buttons that I ordered to sell at my show tomorrow night. They look good though.
Let me know if you are missing 5 pizzas, because I can't figure out where they are going to, and the pizza guy is getting ready to take them back. Won't even leave them.
-K