Living my life
Let's just say... things are changing. Er, well, things HAVE been changing. I haven't updated this in a while. I moved out on my own. I live with Jamie (who is a great chef, I might add) and I'm starting to sort through a lot of bullshit and actually live my life. I'm starting to find out who I really am.
I met someone. I was unsure about this person; very different from what I'm used to. I kind of brushed it off for awhile until I started re-evaluating my so-called "love life." Maybe the reason I haven't found anything serious (or can't keep anything serious) is because I really have been looking in all the wrong places. People would tell me "Aw, you just haven't met the right person yet." I brushed that off as BS, too. I've dated every type of guy in the book. Younger, older, different ethnicities, skater boys, straight edgers, party boys, stoners, preps, frat bro's, nerds, smart ones, dumb ones, cocky ones, insecure ones, rich ones, poor ones, country boys, city boys...
Seriously. You name the type of guy, I have dated him. It always seems to fall apart one of two ways. A. I make myself believe that this guy is "perfect" and that I really do "like" him, but in the end, I realize that I don't. or B. "He's just not that into you."
All this time I've been thinking that it's just me, something I'm doing wrong. I'm too clingy, not clingy enough, not pretty enough, too pretty, too smart, not smart enough, etc. etc...
And it is me, however, those reasons (like those above) are wrong. There's just been something about me that guys can't seem to "click" with and that something holds me back from really "clicking" with them.
This new person has opened up my eyes (to a whole new world that has since been in disguiseeeeeee... sorry, random Spill Canvas lyric moment!) but really, I think I'm starting to figure myself out on a deeper level. It's sort of nerve racking, but if this indeed does work out...
Let's just say I'll be the happiest, luckiest girl on the planet! =)
I met someone. I was unsure about this person; very different from what I'm used to. I kind of brushed it off for awhile until I started re-evaluating my so-called "love life." Maybe the reason I haven't found anything serious (or can't keep anything serious) is because I really have been looking in all the wrong places. People would tell me "Aw, you just haven't met the right person yet." I brushed that off as BS, too. I've dated every type of guy in the book. Younger, older, different ethnicities, skater boys, straight edgers, party boys, stoners, preps, frat bro's, nerds, smart ones, dumb ones, cocky ones, insecure ones, rich ones, poor ones, country boys, city boys...
Seriously. You name the type of guy, I have dated him. It always seems to fall apart one of two ways. A. I make myself believe that this guy is "perfect" and that I really do "like" him, but in the end, I realize that I don't. or B. "He's just not that into you."
All this time I've been thinking that it's just me, something I'm doing wrong. I'm too clingy, not clingy enough, not pretty enough, too pretty, too smart, not smart enough, etc. etc...
And it is me, however, those reasons (like those above) are wrong. There's just been something about me that guys can't seem to "click" with and that something holds me back from really "clicking" with them.
This new person has opened up my eyes (to a whole new world that has since been in disguiseeeeeee... sorry, random Spill Canvas lyric moment!) but really, I think I'm starting to figure myself out on a deeper level. It's sort of nerve racking, but if this indeed does work out...
Let's just say I'll be the happiest, luckiest girl on the planet! =)