these are sooo true....
You Know You're From Mississippi When...
You've been to or know about the towns of: Hot Coffee, Whynot, Soso, Shuqualak, Okalona, and Noxapater.
When someone talks about The Flag, you know exactly what flag they're refering to.
In any given parking lot, every third car has a Flag bumpersticker.
Your neighbor (or yourself) has the Confederate battle flag in his yard and nothing else.
You eat coon hash.
You know where chittlins come from.
You know it's coke, not "pop", or "soda."
You know pop is a noise or an action (ie the coon popped out of his hole), not a soft drink.
You can tell, purely by accent, whether a person is from the Black Belt, the Red Clay Hills, the Piney Woods, or the Delta.
You know that the Delta is not the one below New Orleans.
Your church's attendance is reduced by half on opening day of bow season.
The preacher is not there on opening day of gun season.
The last time it snowed, you took fifteen photos and put some in your freezer for old time's sake.
A seven course meal is a bucket of KFC and a six-pack.
There is a trampoline in your neighbor's back yard.
Teenagers refer to the bus as the "cheese wagon," and refuse to ride it.
You only know five spices--salt, pepper, Ranch dressing, BBQ Sauce and hot sauce.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Mississippi.
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You Know You're From Dublin When...
You say "I'm Grand" all the time.
You drink Guinness as if it is a sixth food group.
You disagree with above - Guinness is the FIRST food group.
You're pale and white... yet compared to others your suntan looks good.
You say "Are you grand?" all the time.
You say "Isn't it grand?" all the time.
You say "That'd be grand?" all the time.
You can pronounce names like Eoghan, Niamh and Siobhan
You take 4 hours to get home on a Saturday night and think nothing of it.
You don't eat anything cold, uncooked or not resembling meat, bread or potatoes
You say "Your man" all the time.
You say "Your woman" all the time.
You say "It's grand that your man asked if I'm grand" all the time.
You find yourself still living with family and having dinners cooked for you by someone's mammy - at thirty.
You talk about 'dinners' and 'mammys'.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Dublin.
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You Know You're Irish When....
The condensation on your pint of Guinness takes the shape of shamrocks
You don't believe there is a God, but you are damn sure of the infallibility of the Pope.
You believe that to forgive is divine, but you don't excercise it yourself.
You won't eat meat on Friday, but you'll drink a pint for breakfast.
You consider any Irishman who has become successful a traitor.
You have great respect for the truth, and you only use it in emergencies.
The further you get from Ireland, the more Irish you get.
You eat homefried taters for brakfast, potato bread for lunch, and potato stew for dinner.
You cry at sad movies, but you cheer in battle.
You will never play professional basketball.
You swear very well.
You think you sing very well.
There isn't a huge difference between losing your temper and killing someone.
You're strangely poetic after a few beers.
Many of your sisters are Catherine, Elizabeth or Mary and one is Mary Catherine Elizabeth.
You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking so you can start talking.
Much of your food is boiled.
You are, or know someone, named "Murph." If you don't know Murph, then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph or Mac, then you know Sully, and you'll probably also know Sully McMurphy.
Your parents were on a first name basis with everyone at the local emergency room.
There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last keg party.
You're proud to be Irish - and you pass these jokes on to all your Irish friends!
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You Know You're From Seattle When...
You have a very strong opinion about where your coffee beans are grown, and you can taste the difference between Sumatran and Ethiopian
You feel guilty throwing an aluminum can in the trash.
You use the words "sun break" and know what it means.
You know more than 10 words to describe a cup of coffee.
You know what a dry cappachino is.
You obey all traffic laws EXCEPT "keep right except to pass."
You know at least eight people who work for either Microsoft or Boeing.
You invite twice as many people as you really want to a party since only half will actually show up.
You know what Lutefiske is.
You personally know someone from Alaska.
You consider floating bridges a pain in the butt, not an engineering marvel.
You know how to pronounce "Sequim", "Puyallup" and "Issaquah."
You have roots in Oregon, Idaho or Montana, but wanted a high paying job.
You've tried to get a job in Alaska, especially a summer job only.
You think skiing always means being covered from head to toe, on snow or water.
You know at least three Microsoft burnouts, of which two are millionaires.
You use more than 5 words to order a cup of coffee. "I want to order an unleaded, double, short, skinny, wet cappuccino with a shot of Amaretto please."
A "designer" wardrobe comes from REI, Eddie Bauer, Lands End, and Birkenstock.
You consider it a sunny day if the sun is visible at some point of the day.
You've been "snow" skiing in the RAIN more than in the snow.
When you're discussing rainforests and volcanoes, you're NOT talking about Hawaii.
You Remember the Kingdome
You have tried to forget about WTO
You know how BLUE the skies are here compared to Eastern Washington
The guy at 8:30 am at Starbucks wearing the baseball cap and sunglasses who looks like Phyllis Diller is really a trans named Eva Destruction that used to play with Hole.
Your car insurance costs more because your neighbors don't have any!
Your mayor is straight, 1/2 your friends are gay, the man who delivers your mail has a bumper sticker that reads "when they pry it from my cold dead fingers....", and your Burger World drive thru order taker was a computer millionaire last week.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends from Seattle.
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What Your Face Says
At first glance, people see you as driven and ambitious.
Overall, your true self is passionate and physical.
With friends, you seem dramatic, lively, and quick to react.
In love, you seem intelligent and a bit intimidating.
In stressful situations, you seem sad and helpless.
What Do People Think Of Your Face?
AND this last one....is SOOO true....
You Know You're Addicted to LotR When...
You start quoting from the movie as part of regular conversation.
You like to tell your mom that you are hungry by quoting: "Merry, I'm hungry."
She used to just laugh, but now she says, "What would you like to eat, Pippin?"
You continually ask your parents for second breakfast.
All the staff at your local cinema knows you by your first name and even before you open your mouth to speak, they say "Ticket for 'Fellowship of The Ring?'"
You hate Burger King food, butyou ate nothing else for a month to get the toys.
You've crammed up your computer's memory by downloading every single screensaver from www.LordoftheRings.net
You wander around the house in a knee length nightie, pyjama trousers and an unfastened dressing gown (to give you a train). You are trying to be an elf, and actually manage to forget that the nightie is blue with dolphins, the trousers have teddies on and the dressing gown is tartan.
Your Lord of the Rings shirt has not yet met the washing machine.
You don't have enough money to buy groceries for the next week before payday, yet you charge �50 on your credit card to get a three year charter membership in the official LOTR fan club. Who needs food anyway?
You refer to parts of your town as parts of Middle-Earth.
You wear hobbitish clothing as part of your normal wardrobe.
You sometimes let your hair go curly after a wash, and then run around the house in bare feet yelling "I'm a hobbit!"
You hate it when Elves are only thought of as 'Santa's little helpers' and have tried to explain the difference between Santa-elves and Syrian Elves to your 5-year old cousins.
You speak in Quenya just to annoy your friends.
You refer to regular elephants as oliphaunts.
While buttering a piece of bread, you suddenly think of Bilbo (remember when he was talking to Gandalf about feeling tired) saying that he felt 'like butter spread over too much bread.'
You renamed your car the Wraith-mobile.
You have a replica of The One Ring.
You are beginning to resemble a panda due to the fact that you've stayed up until 2 am reading and re-reading the great books.
You actually managed to read the Silmarillion without being tempted to give up on this whole middle earth malarkey.
You now have a lifetime fear of black horses!
You haven't removed the soundtrack from your CD player since you bought it.
You have sssudenly developed a hisssing lisssp every time you sssay the letter ssss.
You have looked both on the net and in the phone book to see if archery and sword fighting lessions are offered in your area.
You have begun calling your husband / wife / girlfriend/ boyfriend / animal or kid my precioussss.
You happily traveled over an hour to the next town to see "it" because that theater has a better sound system than the one 5 minutes down the road.
You have called every theatrical or specialty makeup company in town looking for pointy ear or hairy feet prosthetics.
You've worn your plastic "one ring" that came on your Legolas bookmark so much the gold is completely worn off.
You've begun drafting a letter to the Webster's dictionary people requesting that they include "Ringers" in their next edition.
At Christmas time relatives find you chatting with the tree and sharing eggnog draughts
Single ads with the description," short plump and big hairy feet" seem much more appealing.
You know The LoTR history better then your family history.
You have a mouse named Frodo, a bird named Gollum, and a dog named Gandalf. And that cat that keeps coming around to be petted is Legolas.
You know Elvish better then English.
Whenever something goes wrong, it's Sauron's fault.
When you sing in the shower, it's always about Gil-Galad or hobbit walking songs...
You know everything about Middle Earth geography, but you can't get someone from your house to the ice cream parlor. Now the nearest movie theater, that is a different story.
You think the names of the 7 dwarves from Snow White are: Gimli, Gloin, Thorin, Gili, Nili, Ori, and Bambour.
You have developed your own special Tolkien handwriting. "A firm, flowing script..."
Words like "Yrch" make sense to you.
You've become strangely obsessed with mushrooms.
Whenever you close a door, you say "They have a cave troll!"
When you come to a dead end you're still convinced that the road goes ever on and on.
There's a sign on your door saying "Speak Friend and enter!"
Whenever you get a chance, you burst into song. Preferably one that has more than 20 verses.
You change your name by deed poll to a Tolkien character and seriously consider naming your children after LOTR characters.
Every time you see birds in the sky you have the urge to say "Fly you fools!"
When someone knocks on your door you grab them, pull them inside and ask "Are you frightend?... Not nearly frightend enough!"
Your computer's screensaver is a marquee reading, "Ennyn Durin atan Moria: pedo mellon a mino" and the password is actually "mellon".
You cannot see a beer without blurting out "It comes in pints? I'm getting one!"
You just can't keep yourself from saying "nobody tosses a Dwarf" at inappropriate moments.
A shadow and a threat is growing in your mind.
You now referring to your friends as your 'Fellowship' and insist that you have epic adventures.
You stand in the doorway and tell your cat that he 'Can not pass'.
You wash your face in the sink and expect to see things that are, that have been or that will be.
Your wedding band has started to weigh you down with it's evil powers.
Spending $35 at the grocery store seems expensive but its Perfectly fine to spend $70 on the Hardcover LOTR book with Alan Lee Illustrations.
You start keeping a LOTR Journal to write poems and inklings in.
You face every difficult decision with the thought "now what would Gandalf advise me to do?"
You know what Entmoot, Ent draught, or an Ent is for that matter
You've gained 20 pounds because you've started eating a "Second Breakfast"
A walking stick... you never leave home with out it.
You actually get these jokes and pass them on to other friends who are addicted to Lord of the Rings.
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