Facebook is bad for my blood pressure.
Why do I do this? Why do I engage in debate with people on facebook when I know it's not going to lead to anything good? Honest to God, someone should just come along, take me by the hand, and lead me out of the room before I hit the reply button, because otherwise, I end up going through keyboards by mashing my face against them in an incoherent rage.
It's costly. That's what I'm saying. And I should know better. And yet, I clearly do not.
Clearly, I need to come up with a standard for debate. Like at the fair--"you must be this tall to ride the ride". "You must be able to spell the word 'ridiculous' in order to argue with me on facebook".
Plus, you may not realize it, but the way in which you're arguing with me, the stuff that you're throwing out to support your argument? Is in fact, proving my argument.
Okay, now I'm going to get more specific, and I'm going to put it under a cut, because it's talking about Chris Brown and Rhianna and the Grammy awards, and it might be triggering, so under it goes.
Usually, I ignore facebook, except to look at cute pictures of my relatives, and post cute pictures of my own aliens. But someone I know posted a link to two stories about Chris Brown and the Grammy awards, and I agreed with her, so I shared... resposted... whatever it is that you do when you say 'hey, I believe this too' and link to it on facebook.
The stories are here:
I’m Not Okay with Chris Brown Performing at the Grammys and I’m Not Sure Why You Are
No, We Don’t Have to Forgive Chris Brown
I'm going to mea culpa here--I didn't closely follow what happened two years ago when this incident took place. I don't have all the facts about the police reports, or who said what, and what happened. I did see the pictures of what was done to Rhianna's face, and I do remember that there was backlash, and that a lot, if not most, of it was against her.
Despite my lack of detailed knowledge, I feel pretty comfortable with saying two things: 1) What happened to her, as evidenced by the picture I saw of her face was not okay, and 2) Blaming a person who got hit in the face in a way that causes that kind of damage is not okay.
And because I don't know a lot about this whole thing, I'm going to provide a link to someone who is a) awesome, and b) does know a lot more about the whole thing. He's Jay Smooth, and if you haven't heard of him before, you may get stuck on youtube for awhile after this watching everything he's ever done. I'd apologize, but I'm not sorry.
Just... food for thought.
Anyway. I linked to those articles on facebook, because I agree with them. I said that we don't have to forgive him for multiple reasons, but in particular, no one is admitting that there was wrongdoing. No one seems to believe that anyone did anything wrong. No one seems to care, that's for certain. And Chris Brown (and the Grammys, which what the FUCK) are making themselves out to be the victimized ones, which is just no. I'm tired beyond tired of people who are talented (at least by popular opinion) not having to face the consequences of their actions because they do something better than the average person.
(I am paraphrasing my own words here, and I'll be paraphrasing the words of others because dear God, the last thing I need is for this particular in person friend finding all the gay porn I'm writing. I live in a very rural, very redneck town. I think that there might be pitchforks and mobs and chasing if they found out about it.)
It's not that I expect everyone to agree with me, because they seldom do, but I do expect, or hope, or perhaps just dream that when people disagree with me, they won't be stupid about it.
I never said I wasn't a Pollyanna Mary Sunshine, guys. C'mon.
So a few people agreed with me, including the AH's red state, married an American aunt, and then this friend of mine from high school chimes in.
Her primary concern? This is going to be stealing the limelight from Adele (and she spells her name 'Adle'. Just saying). This is, you see, a major event for such a wonderful person and performer, and this BS should not be stealing from her limelight, but controversy wins over triumph, so screw the Grammys.
...
Okay. So. I didn't bring this up in this conversation, but let's start with one thing over here. There is one story that's going to be told in the next days and weeks, and it's going to get a lot more press, ink, and cover time... and it isn't going to be Chris Brown, Adele, or Rhianna, regardless of what happens at the Grammy Awards.
It's Whitney Houston. To paraphrase Sam Seaborn on The West Wing, everyone else just lost their news cycle. And I am not trying to make light of the fact that she died--not at all. I'm just making the point that the music community just lost one of their own, they lost her young, and it's more than likely, in fact probable, that they did not lose her by natural means. It's tragic, it's outright sad, and it's going to be what people are talking about, and writing about, for quite some time.
What I did say to her is that I didn't agree. For one thing, the decisions have already been made about who's going to win. If this is going to be Adele's night of triumph, either based on awards, or based on her upcoming performance, then nothing about these articles being written about Chris Brown is going to affect that. For another thing, I consider this injustice, not controversy. Like Jay Smooth said--he violently assaulted someone that he was supposed to love, and a couple of years later, he's walking up onto that stage and it's being referred to as a comeback, and triumphant.
That's where the outrage should be, if she's going to be outraged on behalf of Adele. Having to undergo surgery and risk losing your voice, coming back from that to perform? That's a triumphant comeback. Staying off the Grammy stage for 2 years, then coming back and performing again like nothing ever happened? That is not triumphant. That is not a comeback. That is an outrage.
She came back again. Only this time, the outrage is that Rhianna's allowed to perform as well. Despite (dispite, her spelling) the physical harm she inflicted on him.
Again, I don't know the details of what happened--I have to admit that. I don't know what Rhianna did to him, alleged or otherwise.
But she didn't plead guilty to charges stemming from the incident. And I didn't see a picture of him with his face bashed in.
In her opinion, Rhianna has not been held accountable for her actions, and the media is ignoring that part of the story, and don't I know that men get abused too, and that women lie, and the media promotes injustice, ignores half of the story, and that's the way it goes.
I haven't commented again. I came over here, because I kind of had a rage blackout, and I didn't need to be spewing it all over facebook where my Gramma can see me use curse words. And because I don't know how to rationally respond to her comment in any way that isn't OH MY FUCKING GOD ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW *rageflail*.
Because I know that women assault men. And women assault women. And women assault children. Humans assault people, and when it happens, it's wrong, and the people who do it should be held accountable for their actions.
But... am I wrong, or is this not one of those instances? I mean, honestly, people who know better than I do--am I wrong here? Because I don't have encyclopaedic knowledge of what took place a couple of years ago. So maybe I am wrong.
But I don't think I am, this time. Because I saw that picture. Nobody should ever have seen that picture, because it wasn't supposed to be released, but I did see it. And no one should ever, EVER, do that to another person. And anyone who does should be held accountable for their actions.
And I don't remember seeing a picture like that of Chris Brown.
It's costly. That's what I'm saying. And I should know better. And yet, I clearly do not.
Clearly, I need to come up with a standard for debate. Like at the fair--"you must be this tall to ride the ride". "You must be able to spell the word 'ridiculous' in order to argue with me on facebook".
Plus, you may not realize it, but the way in which you're arguing with me, the stuff that you're throwing out to support your argument? Is in fact, proving my argument.
Okay, now I'm going to get more specific, and I'm going to put it under a cut, because it's talking about Chris Brown and Rhianna and the Grammy awards, and it might be triggering, so under it goes.
Usually, I ignore facebook, except to look at cute pictures of my relatives, and post cute pictures of my own aliens. But someone I know posted a link to two stories about Chris Brown and the Grammy awards, and I agreed with her, so I shared... resposted... whatever it is that you do when you say 'hey, I believe this too' and link to it on facebook.
The stories are here:
I’m Not Okay with Chris Brown Performing at the Grammys and I’m Not Sure Why You Are
No, We Don’t Have to Forgive Chris Brown
I'm going to mea culpa here--I didn't closely follow what happened two years ago when this incident took place. I don't have all the facts about the police reports, or who said what, and what happened. I did see the pictures of what was done to Rhianna's face, and I do remember that there was backlash, and that a lot, if not most, of it was against her.
Despite my lack of detailed knowledge, I feel pretty comfortable with saying two things: 1) What happened to her, as evidenced by the picture I saw of her face was not okay, and 2) Blaming a person who got hit in the face in a way that causes that kind of damage is not okay.
And because I don't know a lot about this whole thing, I'm going to provide a link to someone who is a) awesome, and b) does know a lot more about the whole thing. He's Jay Smooth, and if you haven't heard of him before, you may get stuck on youtube for awhile after this watching everything he's ever done. I'd apologize, but I'm not sorry.
Click to viewJust... food for thought.
Anyway. I linked to those articles on facebook, because I agree with them. I said that we don't have to forgive him for multiple reasons, but in particular, no one is admitting that there was wrongdoing. No one seems to believe that anyone did anything wrong. No one seems to care, that's for certain. And Chris Brown (and the Grammys, which what the FUCK) are making themselves out to be the victimized ones, which is just no. I'm tired beyond tired of people who are talented (at least by popular opinion) not having to face the consequences of their actions because they do something better than the average person.
(I am paraphrasing my own words here, and I'll be paraphrasing the words of others because dear God, the last thing I need is for this particular in person friend finding all the gay porn I'm writing. I live in a very rural, very redneck town. I think that there might be pitchforks and mobs and chasing if they found out about it.)
It's not that I expect everyone to agree with me, because they seldom do, but I do expect, or hope, or perhaps just dream that when people disagree with me, they won't be stupid about it.
I never said I wasn't a Pollyanna Mary Sunshine, guys. C'mon.
So a few people agreed with me, including the AH's red state, married an American aunt, and then this friend of mine from high school chimes in.
Her primary concern? This is going to be stealing the limelight from Adele (and she spells her name 'Adle'. Just saying). This is, you see, a major event for such a wonderful person and performer, and this BS should not be stealing from her limelight, but controversy wins over triumph, so screw the Grammys.
...
Okay. So. I didn't bring this up in this conversation, but let's start with one thing over here. There is one story that's going to be told in the next days and weeks, and it's going to get a lot more press, ink, and cover time... and it isn't going to be Chris Brown, Adele, or Rhianna, regardless of what happens at the Grammy Awards.
It's Whitney Houston. To paraphrase Sam Seaborn on The West Wing, everyone else just lost their news cycle. And I am not trying to make light of the fact that she died--not at all. I'm just making the point that the music community just lost one of their own, they lost her young, and it's more than likely, in fact probable, that they did not lose her by natural means. It's tragic, it's outright sad, and it's going to be what people are talking about, and writing about, for quite some time.
What I did say to her is that I didn't agree. For one thing, the decisions have already been made about who's going to win. If this is going to be Adele's night of triumph, either based on awards, or based on her upcoming performance, then nothing about these articles being written about Chris Brown is going to affect that. For another thing, I consider this injustice, not controversy. Like Jay Smooth said--he violently assaulted someone that he was supposed to love, and a couple of years later, he's walking up onto that stage and it's being referred to as a comeback, and triumphant.
That's where the outrage should be, if she's going to be outraged on behalf of Adele. Having to undergo surgery and risk losing your voice, coming back from that to perform? That's a triumphant comeback. Staying off the Grammy stage for 2 years, then coming back and performing again like nothing ever happened? That is not triumphant. That is not a comeback. That is an outrage.
She came back again. Only this time, the outrage is that Rhianna's allowed to perform as well. Despite (dispite, her spelling) the physical harm she inflicted on him.
Again, I don't know the details of what happened--I have to admit that. I don't know what Rhianna did to him, alleged or otherwise.
But she didn't plead guilty to charges stemming from the incident. And I didn't see a picture of him with his face bashed in.
In her opinion, Rhianna has not been held accountable for her actions, and the media is ignoring that part of the story, and don't I know that men get abused too, and that women lie, and the media promotes injustice, ignores half of the story, and that's the way it goes.
I haven't commented again. I came over here, because I kind of had a rage blackout, and I didn't need to be spewing it all over facebook where my Gramma can see me use curse words. And because I don't know how to rationally respond to her comment in any way that isn't OH MY FUCKING GOD ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW *rageflail*.
Because I know that women assault men. And women assault women. And women assault children. Humans assault people, and when it happens, it's wrong, and the people who do it should be held accountable for their actions.
But... am I wrong, or is this not one of those instances? I mean, honestly, people who know better than I do--am I wrong here? Because I don't have encyclopaedic knowledge of what took place a couple of years ago. So maybe I am wrong.
But I don't think I am, this time. Because I saw that picture. Nobody should ever have seen that picture, because it wasn't supposed to be released, but I did see it. And no one should ever, EVER, do that to another person. And anyone who does should be held accountable for their actions.
And I don't remember seeing a picture like that of Chris Brown.