the would-be soccer mom post from work
Today is a Come Down On People Like The Fist Of God sort of day... week... month? At work, that is. This week has been gods-awful with an excess of hostile attitude. I'm channeling Starbuck just to cheer me up.
(I took a break from RuPaul and picked up where I left off on Battlestar Galactica. Shut up, I know how dorky I sound.)
Sev's introspective post has got me thinking about my own feelings of burnout and meh now. Introspection is contagious, I tell you.
There's nothing special about my job. I'm a full-time glorified babysitter/soccer mom for people on psychoactive cocktails and it is not
glamorous. I am a secretary/handler/verbal punching bag all rolled into one for barely above the state's minimum wage. There once was a time when I was working AND going to school full-time and making that work. Now that I'm the It Girl at the Frat House I'm not so much working with people who want to rip off my face, but people who might tell me to eat shit and die (on a good day!) and truthfully, it's not all that bad considering who I was working with before.
But I still come home exhausted and barely able to sustain conversation with my own partner. I am drained. Swimming helps, and yet it doesn't - it frees up my mind, but physically it just adds on to the exhaustion.
Yesterday I came home from the pool and literally curled up with a blanket and passed out on the living room floor with my cats.
Today is my short day. Brian (my brudda from another mudda) will be over with beer to hang out with Eric by the time I come home. I'm not sure I'll have the spoons to entertain people today. Chances are I'll be hiding in the bedroom with my laptop marathoning more Battlestar Galactica with the door closed.
Eat, sleep, work, swim. Rinse and repeat.
The farthest I've gotten in respect to getting back into school is fill out this year's FAFSA. I haven't bothered with the rest.
I have at least a year and half left of school, give or take. That's for undergrad.
What the hell is stopping me? I feel like I should be doing more, like I'm just wasting all that my fabulous brain is capable of. How do I even find the spoons for that?
I swear there's something funny in the air this year.
(I took a break from RuPaul and picked up where I left off on Battlestar Galactica. Shut up, I know how dorky I sound.)
Sev's introspective post has got me thinking about my own feelings of burnout and meh now. Introspection is contagious, I tell you.
There's nothing special about my job. I'm a full-time glorified babysitter/soccer mom for people on psychoactive cocktails and it is not
glamorous. I am a secretary/handler/verbal punching bag all rolled into one for barely above the state's minimum wage. There once was a time when I was working AND going to school full-time and making that work. Now that I'm the It Girl at the Frat House I'm not so much working with people who want to rip off my face, but people who might tell me to eat shit and die (on a good day!) and truthfully, it's not all that bad considering who I was working with before.
But I still come home exhausted and barely able to sustain conversation with my own partner. I am drained. Swimming helps, and yet it doesn't - it frees up my mind, but physically it just adds on to the exhaustion.
Yesterday I came home from the pool and literally curled up with a blanket and passed out on the living room floor with my cats.
Today is my short day. Brian (my brudda from another mudda) will be over with beer to hang out with Eric by the time I come home. I'm not sure I'll have the spoons to entertain people today. Chances are I'll be hiding in the bedroom with my laptop marathoning more Battlestar Galactica with the door closed.
Eat, sleep, work, swim. Rinse and repeat.
The farthest I've gotten in respect to getting back into school is fill out this year's FAFSA. I haven't bothered with the rest.
I have at least a year and half left of school, give or take. That's for undergrad.
What the hell is stopping me? I feel like I should be doing more, like I'm just wasting all that my fabulous brain is capable of. How do I even find the spoons for that?
I swear there's something funny in the air this year.