Learning from Eleanor
I tried a new book group today at the local school. The book they had chosen was NO ORDINARY TIME. FRANKLIN AND ELEANOR ROOSEVELT: THE HOME FRONT IN WORLD WAR II by Doris Kearns Goodwin. I've read a lot about the Roosevelts, especially Eleanor, but I had never read this book. At over 600 pages, I thought it was a brave choice for a book group. I was curious what the discussion would be like. I took the challenge of reading the book (finishing just last night) and trying something new.
It was a lively group of 15 or so women. Almost everyone said they would never have picked up this book themselves and everyone who read it (almost everyone there) said they had really enjoyed it. It is interesting to think about how we choose what we read as adults. I'm sure I limit myself far too much without giving it enough consideration.
I've always thought Eleanor to be extraordinary and this book gave me even more details to admire. There is something in me that wants to emulate that woman who pushed through a natural inclination of shyness to be the person she wanted to be. "The thing always to remember is that you must do the thing you think you cannot do." How often does one really live like that? She did, and it is remarkable to read about on so many levels.
Some more from Eleanor:
"I realized that if I remained in the White House all the time I would lose touch with the rest of the world. I might have had a less crowded life, but I would begin to think that my life in Washington was representative of the rest of the country and that is a dangerous point of view."
I think this is part of the reason I like to travel so much. You need to see that other point of view to expand your own. And you need to step out of your own environment to appreciate what nourishes you at home.
Regarding her children whose careers had been unsteady and whose private lives more shaky (the four boys had 18 marriages). "I don't seem able to shake the feeling of responsibility...I guess I was a pretty unwise teacher as to how to go about living. Too late to do anything now, however, and I'm rather disgusted with myself." Imagine that in her 30s ER felt she couldn't teach her child anything about a life well lived. That's incredible to me. And something to remember when I sit here thinking of what a failure I must seem to my children.
"If only Mother could have learned to ease up," her son Elliot wrote, "things would have been a lot different w/ father, for he needed relaxation more than anything in the world. But she simply could not bring herself to unwind..."
Goodwin wrote, "She became the agitator while he became the politican." We talked about this today a lot. Most people thought ER needed to lighten up a little. I thought FDR needed to be more like Eleanor. She wanted him to loosen the immigration rules and allow more Jews into the United States. She wanted him to dismantle the Japanese internment camps. No wonder she couldn't relax.
Several people thought any criticism of FDR too harsh. He did a lot. He did more than most. Yes, but what if he had done what Eleanor wanted to do? What if she had been in the position where she could have done it herself?
It was a lively group of 15 or so women. Almost everyone said they would never have picked up this book themselves and everyone who read it (almost everyone there) said they had really enjoyed it. It is interesting to think about how we choose what we read as adults. I'm sure I limit myself far too much without giving it enough consideration.
I've always thought Eleanor to be extraordinary and this book gave me even more details to admire. There is something in me that wants to emulate that woman who pushed through a natural inclination of shyness to be the person she wanted to be. "The thing always to remember is that you must do the thing you think you cannot do." How often does one really live like that? She did, and it is remarkable to read about on so many levels.
Some more from Eleanor:
"I realized that if I remained in the White House all the time I would lose touch with the rest of the world. I might have had a less crowded life, but I would begin to think that my life in Washington was representative of the rest of the country and that is a dangerous point of view."
I think this is part of the reason I like to travel so much. You need to see that other point of view to expand your own. And you need to step out of your own environment to appreciate what nourishes you at home.
Regarding her children whose careers had been unsteady and whose private lives more shaky (the four boys had 18 marriages). "I don't seem able to shake the feeling of responsibility...I guess I was a pretty unwise teacher as to how to go about living. Too late to do anything now, however, and I'm rather disgusted with myself." Imagine that in her 30s ER felt she couldn't teach her child anything about a life well lived. That's incredible to me. And something to remember when I sit here thinking of what a failure I must seem to my children.
"If only Mother could have learned to ease up," her son Elliot wrote, "things would have been a lot different w/ father, for he needed relaxation more than anything in the world. But she simply could not bring herself to unwind..."
Goodwin wrote, "She became the agitator while he became the politican." We talked about this today a lot. Most people thought ER needed to lighten up a little. I thought FDR needed to be more like Eleanor. She wanted him to loosen the immigration rules and allow more Jews into the United States. She wanted him to dismantle the Japanese internment camps. No wonder she couldn't relax.
Several people thought any criticism of FDR too harsh. He did a lot. He did more than most. Yes, but what if he had done what Eleanor wanted to do? What if she had been in the position where she could have done it herself?