People are dumb
Such a duh statement I know~ (Oh and I'm not dead. I posts bunches over on wordpress.)
So making the fact we're expecting public knowledge lends itself to all kinds of advice. People come out of the wood work, and for twins it's even more insane. Hell my mom even got hugged by the special bagger at the grocery store because she overheard my mom telling one of the cashiers she sees all the time there about it. Don't get me wrong here. I love the support and I'm sure I'll need even more of it once they arrive, but there's a few things that are getting on my nerves already. Sadly I doubt they will go away any time soon.
First of all stop with the touching. I'm not a standoffish type person. I've always been open with my friends and fam and give hugs and such freely. However, don't just walk up to me and start fondling my belly. It's always been an area I've been self conscious about in general and not a place I enjoy being touched under any circumstance. That's my own quirk I'll have to get over I'm sure. The thing that gets me is that, I'm barely showing. Why would people be compleled to touch me when I'm not showing? (I look about 20 weeks for a first time mom.) People aren't going to look at me from across the room and go "ooo she's knocked up!" I can't even feel the kids all that much so there is zero hope for you. If you must, ask first. If you don't, there's a good chance I'm just going to slap you. You has been the warned~
Everyone has their opinions and they not only will they offer theirs, but judge yours at the drop of a hat. The judging is getting tiresome already, and I know it's just going to get worse. A comment along the likes of "yay twins, now you can get fixed because your family is done!" is the most common followed by something about "you aren't going to nurse them are you" and surprisingly "OMG you better get a c-section as twins will ruin you for life!" is a close third.
Last time I checked there were only two people in my marriage and said two people are the only ones that get a say in when our family is done. If we chose to stop having kids, who says we have to pay all kinds of dollars to get "fixed" anyway. There are bunches of other options far less drastic/invasive/expensive out there.
The nursing comment floors me. They are my kids and I have my own opinions on nursing vs formula, and frankly between research and personal experience with kids raised both ways, I have no idea why anyone who can nurse would choose not to. As far as the ZOMG how with twins goes, two kids, two breasts so the math works there no problem. As far as the logistics of it all, I'll figure it out as I go. Not like twins is a new phenomenon. We've been doing it long before there was such a thing as formula too. So as long as I can, I will. It's my choice and there is zero wrong with it so stop acting like there is plzkthnks. People are crazy judgmental about such silly things, I swear.
As to the "get a c-section" thing, people are just stupid. This comment has mostly come from 20 something guys who don't have a clue. I know c-sections are crazy commonplace, but they are still a major surgery and come with a lot of complications. There's a far longer heal time, fighting of infections and so on. Recovering from such a thing while caring for twins? That would be the ultimate suck. So please to be born the natural way unless it's absolutely necessary to save the kids or myself. On that note, less drugs is good too. As for the "twins will ruin you" part of that comment, people just don't think. Your average kid born at 40 weeks runs just under 8 pounds. The average twin is born almost 3 pounds lighter. If anything I'm going to be far less "ruined" than the average mother. I also know it's hard for people to believe, but that part of the body was made to stretch, and things will go back to normal after time.
I don’t mind advice or the sharing of opinions, but seriously people need to think more before they open their mouth. .\/.