Lonely Ch 1
Title: Lonely Ch 1
Author: limnological
Rating: PG
Pairing: YoonYul
Description: AU, Slice of life
Author's Note: Hello there! It's been a long time. I am still kicking and breathing. First of all, I'd like to dedicate this story to Lauren aka SooYoona and tell her happy late birthday, again. I'm glad to have finally been able to sit down and create this story. It's a mixture of many different things I have wanted to try for a long time. Much thanks to LiNafied for betaing.
Chapter 1
Words can be such ugly, deadly weapons.
“You’re ugly.”
“Four-eyes.”
“What a loser.”
“Loner.”
These were words that Kwon Yuri had grown accustomed to while growing up. Those sharp words that were spat in her face so casually clawed at her insides little by little as she aged. They were repeated and repeated, ingrained into her head day in and day out like sandpaper rubbing against her skin constantly. She tried not to believe them, tried to defend herself, but the words always got caught in her throat.
“Four-eyes.”
They’re just my glasses.
“No one likes you.”
That’s not true.
“Nerd.”
I’m not a nerd.
“Loner.”
Stop it.
“Loner.”
Stop…
“Loner.”
She began to believe the meaning behind those words. They cut deep into her heart, making her feel like words were such ugly, deadly weapons. Words were dangerous. People used them so easily to hurt others.
Yuri didn’t like words.
How scary.
She thought to herself at 10.
If they can say such mean things and hurt me like this with their words, then couldn’t I be doing the same to someone else? How scary… I don’t want to hurt anyone like this. No, words are dangerous.
So Yuri did her best to keep her sentences to a minimum. It wasn’t too hard considering she didn’t make friends, didn’t initiate conversations, and her parents were never home.
She was an only child, and eventually her mother left the family, leaving her with her father. Her father spent most of the day and night working since they were in trouble financially, so Yuri rarely saw him. Words were rarely spoken in the Kwon household.
School was just a place for her to be from 7 am to 3 pm. It was just a place for her to learn, to do homework, to eat lunch, and then to leave. There were no conversations started, no laughters shared, no friends. She just kept to herself day in and day out, scribbling designs in her sketchbook.
If words were something for her to escape from, then art was her safe haven she escaped to.
Yuri grew up with her sketchbooks as her best friend, drawings upon drawings of clothing scattered around her room. She had a dream of becoming a fashion designer. She’d sit in her room for hours, coming up with new designs, her outgrown round eyed spectacles slipping off her face every few minutes.
As long as she had her sketchbook, she was content.
The bullying had stopped when she turned 14, but her fear of words didn’t.
Words were dangerous and scary.
Soon enough, Yuri had become what she was told she was: she had become a four-eyed loner, even at the age of 17.
Strangely enough, she was fine with that.
Besides, even if she did want to make friends, want to talk to people, she was too scared to do so.
What if she said the wrong thing?
What if she hurt someone with her words?
What if someone hurt her with theirs?
It was just too risky.
So she went day in and day out unnoticed, sitting in the back of the classroom, sketching her designs.
She was perfectly fine with that.
--
“Yuri,” Mrs. Lee called out from behind her desk. “Please read page 37 starting from the 2nd paragraph down.”
“Yes, Mrs. Lee,” Yuri replied softly.
Even if words were scary to her, she could do simple tasks like this for the sake of getting by at school.
Pushing her round eyed glasses back onto its rightful place, she began reading.
When she finished, the bell rung and clattering noises erupted in the classroom. Students gathered their things, walked up to their friends, chattered about while some shuffled out of the classroom.
Yuri took her time putting her books away in her bag, stretching here and there. She glanced over at the girls who were blocking the door, too immersed in their chats to notice they were doing so.
Yuri’s eyes wandered over to another pair of brown eyes in that same crowd and she was awestruck at how those eyes reflected Yuri’s own.
It was only for a split second, but Yuri could swear that those brown eyes had shared the same loneliness that Yuri’s had.
The girls stop chattering and left the classroom while Yuri sat still, her thoughts brewing together.
Can one be lonely even when they are surrounded by other people?
Once the classroom was empty, Yuri was ready to leave.
I wonder.
--
Even though words were scary to Yuri, she wasn’t afraid of using them with herself. When she was out of sight of people, Yuri had this tendency to speak to herself aloud, mostly because she didn’t want to forget what her voice sounded like.
“Let’s see… I think I’ll make pasta tonight.”
She walked down the dimly lit streets, grocery bags in her hands as the evening waned on.
“Maybe alfredo fettuccine?”
She contemplated it as she continued walking on and on.
Suddenly, the street lights that were illuminating her path blew out and Yuri stopped in her tracks.
“How scary… I should get home faster.”
Her steps became brisk and she squinted through the darkness. Before she realized what had happened, her body collided with something else, her glasses falling off onto the ground along with her grocery bags.
“Ow! My glasses…”
“Who’s there?” The unknown female voice was shaky.
Yuri blinked twice, realizing that she had collided with a person. Fear overcame her so she took a step back. She heard the other person step back too in response to her actions. Then she heard a cracking noise.
The light from a cellphone blinded her for a few seconds. She tried to squint to see who was holding it, but she was terribly near blind without her glasses.
“Oh. Are you alright?”
Yuri just nodded.
“Good, but I think I stepped on something…” The light moved from Yuri’s face down to the ground, chasing away the darkness. The other girl lifted up her foot. “Uh oh.”
Yuri’s eyes squinted together and she crouched onto the ground to get a better view. A gasp emitted from her mouth.
She couldn’t see it clearly, but she knew that the person had just crushed her glasses, destroying the lens completely. A piece of Yuri died at that instant. She had worn the same pair of frail round eyed glasses for seven years.
“I am so sorry!”
It was a sincere apology and Yuri knew it too. Before Yuri could do anything else, the street lights flickered back on.
Yuri gasped again.
The person she had just run into was the same girl from her classroom she had seen with the sad, lonely eyes earlier today.
“Oh, you’re Kwon Yuri, aren’t you?”
Yuri nodded, confused that the other girl knew her name.
“I’m Im Yoona, from your class.”
Yuri nodded again, establishing that she had recognized her.
Yoona crouched down picking up the broken frame and fragments of what were once Yuri’s glasses.
“I’m super sorry about this. I promise to pay for your new glasses.”
“What?”
Did I just hear her correctly?
“Can you see at all without them?” Yoona waved her hand in front of Yuri, causing Yuri to squint profusely, trying to follow the blurred blob. “I guess not… I’m guessing you were heading home since you have grocery bags. Do you live nearby?”
“Uh…”
The last time Yuri had spoken to someone one-on-one like this was so long ago that Yuri had forgotten how to respond in a polite and timely manner.
Yoona let out a slight chuckle.
“Oh sorry, I guess that was rude of me. I don’t mean to alarm you, but I just want to make sure you can get home safe. I just crushed your glasses and I would hate for you to have a hard time getting home. Please let me walk you home.”
“It’s -“
Yoona’s hands were already wrapped around Yuri’s grocery bags before Yuri could protest.
“Yes?”
“It’s… this way.”
Yuri pointed in her home’s direction, confused at what had just happened and why Yoona was being so nice to her.
Luckily for them, it wasn’t too far off.
They walked up her doorsteps and Yoona apologized again.
“I’m sorry again for your glasses. Tomorrow, let’s go to your eye doctor and order you some new ones. I’ll be sure to compensate you for the damages.”
Hastily, Yoona pulled out some paper from her backpack and scribbled onto it. She ripped out the lined paper and held it out for Yuri.
“If you need anything, please let me know.”
Yuri cautiously reached out for the paper and blinked at the digits as Yoona apologized again.
“I have to go now, but please don’t hesitate to call if things become troublesome because of your eyesight.”
The younger girl dashed out of Yuri’s sight as she stood still, dumbfounded at how tonight had turned out.
--
Yuri could have sworn it was all a dream, until she realized she couldn’t find her glasses the next day. She really knew it wasn’t a dream when she saw Im Yoona on her door steps again. She really wished it was a dream though when they both stood in front of her eye doctor’s office, facing the “CLOSED” sign.
Yoona read the small text aloud for Yuri.
“‘Closed for a week due to family matters. We apologize for the inconvenience.’ Oh no… Can you order your glasses from a different doctor?”
Yuri shook her head.“The insurance policy.”
It was an incomplete sentence, but Yoona understood her.
“Right. I also need some time to come up with the money to pay for them. Glasses are expensive after all…” Yoona looked up, brain calculating an estimation. “If I’m right, it’ll take about a month for me to pay for them.”
Yuri sighed.
How was she supposed to take notes in class now? It was also slightly annoying to see everything as a complete blur. She walked to school every day and didn’t like the idea of walking around blindly.
“Okay, that’s it.” Yoona made a fist with her right hand and brought it down on her left palm. “I have an idea.”
Yuri turned her head to face Yoona as she continued talking.
“Let me be your eyes for one whole month.”
“What?”
“I’ll take your notes for you, walk you to school, etc. I’ll take full responsibility for what happened so you won’t be inconvenienced.”
Yuri went frigid, afraid of what Yoona had just proposed.
Eyes for a whole month? Walking me to school? That means she’ll be by my side.
Be.
By.
My.
Side.
For a whole month?!
NO WAY.
Yuri was a loner. Yuri was content not having friends or anyone to talk to. The thought of having a person be by her side constantly was scary.
When people are around, they like to talk, and when they talk, sometimes they say mean things and when they say mean things, it hurts.
She did not like this idea.
Yoona nodded, seemingly being the only one to approve of the idea. She smiled at Yuri and stretched out her hand for Yuri as a handshake.
“Let me reintroduce myself. I’m Im Yoona and I’ll be your eyes for a month!”
----------
TBC
Author: limnological
Rating: PG
Pairing: YoonYul
Description: AU, Slice of life
Author's Note: Hello there! It's been a long time. I am still kicking and breathing. First of all, I'd like to dedicate this story to Lauren aka SooYoona and tell her happy late birthday, again. I'm glad to have finally been able to sit down and create this story. It's a mixture of many different things I have wanted to try for a long time. Much thanks to LiNafied for betaing.
Chapter 1
Words can be such ugly, deadly weapons.
“You’re ugly.”
“Four-eyes.”
“What a loser.”
“Loner.”
These were words that Kwon Yuri had grown accustomed to while growing up. Those sharp words that were spat in her face so casually clawed at her insides little by little as she aged. They were repeated and repeated, ingrained into her head day in and day out like sandpaper rubbing against her skin constantly. She tried not to believe them, tried to defend herself, but the words always got caught in her throat.
“Four-eyes.”
They’re just my glasses.
“No one likes you.”
That’s not true.
“Nerd.”
I’m not a nerd.
“Loner.”
Stop it.
“Loner.”
Stop…
“Loner.”
She began to believe the meaning behind those words. They cut deep into her heart, making her feel like words were such ugly, deadly weapons. Words were dangerous. People used them so easily to hurt others.
Yuri didn’t like words.
How scary.
She thought to herself at 10.
If they can say such mean things and hurt me like this with their words, then couldn’t I be doing the same to someone else? How scary… I don’t want to hurt anyone like this. No, words are dangerous.
So Yuri did her best to keep her sentences to a minimum. It wasn’t too hard considering she didn’t make friends, didn’t initiate conversations, and her parents were never home.
She was an only child, and eventually her mother left the family, leaving her with her father. Her father spent most of the day and night working since they were in trouble financially, so Yuri rarely saw him. Words were rarely spoken in the Kwon household.
School was just a place for her to be from 7 am to 3 pm. It was just a place for her to learn, to do homework, to eat lunch, and then to leave. There were no conversations started, no laughters shared, no friends. She just kept to herself day in and day out, scribbling designs in her sketchbook.
If words were something for her to escape from, then art was her safe haven she escaped to.
Yuri grew up with her sketchbooks as her best friend, drawings upon drawings of clothing scattered around her room. She had a dream of becoming a fashion designer. She’d sit in her room for hours, coming up with new designs, her outgrown round eyed spectacles slipping off her face every few minutes.
As long as she had her sketchbook, she was content.
The bullying had stopped when she turned 14, but her fear of words didn’t.
Words were dangerous and scary.
Soon enough, Yuri had become what she was told she was: she had become a four-eyed loner, even at the age of 17.
Strangely enough, she was fine with that.
Besides, even if she did want to make friends, want to talk to people, she was too scared to do so.
What if she said the wrong thing?
What if she hurt someone with her words?
What if someone hurt her with theirs?
It was just too risky.
So she went day in and day out unnoticed, sitting in the back of the classroom, sketching her designs.
She was perfectly fine with that.
--
“Yuri,” Mrs. Lee called out from behind her desk. “Please read page 37 starting from the 2nd paragraph down.”
“Yes, Mrs. Lee,” Yuri replied softly.
Even if words were scary to her, she could do simple tasks like this for the sake of getting by at school.
Pushing her round eyed glasses back onto its rightful place, she began reading.
When she finished, the bell rung and clattering noises erupted in the classroom. Students gathered their things, walked up to their friends, chattered about while some shuffled out of the classroom.
Yuri took her time putting her books away in her bag, stretching here and there. She glanced over at the girls who were blocking the door, too immersed in their chats to notice they were doing so.
Yuri’s eyes wandered over to another pair of brown eyes in that same crowd and she was awestruck at how those eyes reflected Yuri’s own.
It was only for a split second, but Yuri could swear that those brown eyes had shared the same loneliness that Yuri’s had.
The girls stop chattering and left the classroom while Yuri sat still, her thoughts brewing together.
Can one be lonely even when they are surrounded by other people?
Once the classroom was empty, Yuri was ready to leave.
I wonder.
--
Even though words were scary to Yuri, she wasn’t afraid of using them with herself. When she was out of sight of people, Yuri had this tendency to speak to herself aloud, mostly because she didn’t want to forget what her voice sounded like.
“Let’s see… I think I’ll make pasta tonight.”
She walked down the dimly lit streets, grocery bags in her hands as the evening waned on.
“Maybe alfredo fettuccine?”
She contemplated it as she continued walking on and on.
Suddenly, the street lights that were illuminating her path blew out and Yuri stopped in her tracks.
“How scary… I should get home faster.”
Her steps became brisk and she squinted through the darkness. Before she realized what had happened, her body collided with something else, her glasses falling off onto the ground along with her grocery bags.
“Ow! My glasses…”
“Who’s there?” The unknown female voice was shaky.
Yuri blinked twice, realizing that she had collided with a person. Fear overcame her so she took a step back. She heard the other person step back too in response to her actions. Then she heard a cracking noise.
The light from a cellphone blinded her for a few seconds. She tried to squint to see who was holding it, but she was terribly near blind without her glasses.
“Oh. Are you alright?”
Yuri just nodded.
“Good, but I think I stepped on something…” The light moved from Yuri’s face down to the ground, chasing away the darkness. The other girl lifted up her foot. “Uh oh.”
Yuri’s eyes squinted together and she crouched onto the ground to get a better view. A gasp emitted from her mouth.
She couldn’t see it clearly, but she knew that the person had just crushed her glasses, destroying the lens completely. A piece of Yuri died at that instant. She had worn the same pair of frail round eyed glasses for seven years.
“I am so sorry!”
It was a sincere apology and Yuri knew it too. Before Yuri could do anything else, the street lights flickered back on.
Yuri gasped again.
The person she had just run into was the same girl from her classroom she had seen with the sad, lonely eyes earlier today.
“Oh, you’re Kwon Yuri, aren’t you?”
Yuri nodded, confused that the other girl knew her name.
“I’m Im Yoona, from your class.”
Yuri nodded again, establishing that she had recognized her.
Yoona crouched down picking up the broken frame and fragments of what were once Yuri’s glasses.
“I’m super sorry about this. I promise to pay for your new glasses.”
“What?”
Did I just hear her correctly?
“Can you see at all without them?” Yoona waved her hand in front of Yuri, causing Yuri to squint profusely, trying to follow the blurred blob. “I guess not… I’m guessing you were heading home since you have grocery bags. Do you live nearby?”
“Uh…”
The last time Yuri had spoken to someone one-on-one like this was so long ago that Yuri had forgotten how to respond in a polite and timely manner.
Yoona let out a slight chuckle.
“Oh sorry, I guess that was rude of me. I don’t mean to alarm you, but I just want to make sure you can get home safe. I just crushed your glasses and I would hate for you to have a hard time getting home. Please let me walk you home.”
“It’s -“
Yoona’s hands were already wrapped around Yuri’s grocery bags before Yuri could protest.
“Yes?”
“It’s… this way.”
Yuri pointed in her home’s direction, confused at what had just happened and why Yoona was being so nice to her.
Luckily for them, it wasn’t too far off.
They walked up her doorsteps and Yoona apologized again.
“I’m sorry again for your glasses. Tomorrow, let’s go to your eye doctor and order you some new ones. I’ll be sure to compensate you for the damages.”
Hastily, Yoona pulled out some paper from her backpack and scribbled onto it. She ripped out the lined paper and held it out for Yuri.
“If you need anything, please let me know.”
Yuri cautiously reached out for the paper and blinked at the digits as Yoona apologized again.
“I have to go now, but please don’t hesitate to call if things become troublesome because of your eyesight.”
The younger girl dashed out of Yuri’s sight as she stood still, dumbfounded at how tonight had turned out.
--
Yuri could have sworn it was all a dream, until she realized she couldn’t find her glasses the next day. She really knew it wasn’t a dream when she saw Im Yoona on her door steps again. She really wished it was a dream though when they both stood in front of her eye doctor’s office, facing the “CLOSED” sign.
Yoona read the small text aloud for Yuri.
“‘Closed for a week due to family matters. We apologize for the inconvenience.’ Oh no… Can you order your glasses from a different doctor?”
Yuri shook her head.“The insurance policy.”
It was an incomplete sentence, but Yoona understood her.
“Right. I also need some time to come up with the money to pay for them. Glasses are expensive after all…” Yoona looked up, brain calculating an estimation. “If I’m right, it’ll take about a month for me to pay for them.”
Yuri sighed.
How was she supposed to take notes in class now? It was also slightly annoying to see everything as a complete blur. She walked to school every day and didn’t like the idea of walking around blindly.
“Okay, that’s it.” Yoona made a fist with her right hand and brought it down on her left palm. “I have an idea.”
Yuri turned her head to face Yoona as she continued talking.
“Let me be your eyes for one whole month.”
“What?”
“I’ll take your notes for you, walk you to school, etc. I’ll take full responsibility for what happened so you won’t be inconvenienced.”
Yuri went frigid, afraid of what Yoona had just proposed.
Eyes for a whole month? Walking me to school? That means she’ll be by my side.
Be.
By.
My.
Side.
For a whole month?!
NO WAY.
Yuri was a loner. Yuri was content not having friends or anyone to talk to. The thought of having a person be by her side constantly was scary.
When people are around, they like to talk, and when they talk, sometimes they say mean things and when they say mean things, it hurts.
She did not like this idea.
Yoona nodded, seemingly being the only one to approve of the idea. She smiled at Yuri and stretched out her hand for Yuri as a handshake.
“Let me reintroduce myself. I’m Im Yoona and I’ll be your eyes for a month!”
----------
TBC