It's been a long time since I wrote in this!!
Well my life is just about crazy now....I have a couple more weeks here in California..and I'm not even getting to spend time with my friends..I'm too busy trying to finish my stupid last class for Options For Youth..oh yeah I no longer go to Eagle Rock H.S...I decided to leave that school and go to Options For Youth..which is much better I've already past three classes..which is great! Well many things have been going on... me, my mom, and my brother are moving to Russellville, Arkansas next month..gosh the things I've heard about that place! I will be going back to a regular high school, I'm really not excited about that, and I also have to get a job..that really sux! but at the same time I'm finally going to make my own money!
Friends wise...I have lost 2 great friends or what I thought were great...Well I kinda talk to one of them not a lot though..to tell you the truth I don't even know what the hell happened there...I completely lost my best friend and have no interest in talking to her again...I also don't really know what happened there..it doesn't really matter...some friends don't last forever! as for Jazzy..man shes hilarious...I've had some great times with her...we recently got a ticket which wasn't great, but we went to court then went to a stupid program in Downtown one of the worst places to be! the people in that class scared me I just wanted to get out!! I was scared that they were going to jack my lunch or something...and I thought someone jacked my pencil..I was thinking "why would anyone want to jack a pencil", but it turns out it was under my chair! I'm just so glad I'm done with that 8 hour program..it was hell!!
I haven't gone to VR and it kinda makes me sad, but at the same time I kinda just don't want to go to those places that I will miss once I'm gone....the day is getting closer and i'm getting really scared..to the point that when I think about it I kinda start to shake and I get really scared thinking about what it's gonna be like over there...I have no clue..all I know is the things that I have heard! most things not being so great! but I think I'm going to be living in that town for about a year or two then move up North from there! It's just pretty crazy knowing that I'm not gonna get to see my friends anymore and hangout with them all the time, but hey I gotta do this so oh well...I can't complain cuz I was the one that wanted to leave in the first place!
Of course I'm going to miss my friends, but I'm also going to miss this one specific person. He's one of those people that you see and you feel like your heart just skipped a beat or just completely stopped...he has a wonderful heart and cares about what other people have to say....we have sat so close to each other and have past right next to each other and talked about things that really made me realize more about this world....his name I can never say...he's just amazing and yet I will never have the guts to tell him how I feel! we use to see each other at church..at times we sat across from each other and I couldn't help but look at him most of the time..wow I'm kind of starting to sound a little crazy, but I'm not, I think it's just crazy that I'm stupid enough not to tell him how I feel..why shouldn't I? you know I'm leaving next month...I should be able to tell him, but I just freeze when I see him! god how I wish I could tell him well the only thing close to saying his name is by saying his name is *****!!!!!!