update/night from hell
havent written in a long time. well a lot of shit happened.. uhm.. me n timm have been going out....... 6/5/05... i love him so much. he treats me like shit a lot but i look past it. i guess its not so good but thats what i do.. ive been working at the denville diner on the weekends with vanessa and its amazing. i love it. my mother hates timm. i hate that. she flipped out on me tonight, to the point where i cried, couldnt take it anymore. she finally got to the point where she realized that i really love him and shes going to give him a try. she is going to sit down with him one day and talk with him. that way they can bond and we can all be happy. im caught in the middle of the worst situation ever. i guess i finally got thru to her. i try to tell her all the time that i love him. she doesnt realize it. she came downstairs later on when i was having a cigg and said "make me understand, how you feel about this boy" and i went off on how i love him. when hes away from me i miss him. i worry about him. i have to be on the fone with him when im home. i have to know that hes ok. i miss him when hes sitting right next to me. i love him. i couldnt describe it. how do you describe love? i really dont know. i couldnt make her understand. i kept going to the point where i started crying again. i guess she realized how much she hurt me when she told me she was going to get a restraining order on him. i wanted to kill her. anyways, she said she wants to sit down with him and have a chat with him. nothing nasty. being nice and everything. she wants to be ok with him. i told her all i want is for her to accept him. hes the one person, besides becky, that i want my mom to be ok with. i mean, she loves becky to death.... TO DEATH. but she said she will give him another chance. ok well dont want to write a lot more. oh, one of my aunts, my dad's sister, emailed me. havent seen her since i was about 2 or something. havent talked to her or anything. it was wierd. and im sposed to be going to cali for 3 weeks this summer to see my dad... live on his boat with him. mom decided to tell him tonight that i cant go. im going tho. fuck working in pizza hut. if they cant understand that i havent seen my father in 2-3 years then they can fuck themselves. ok really gonna go this time. im going to try and talk to my dad... hopefully he'll talk to me. :-/ tty all soon.