FIC: Naruto: Admiring with the Heart (4)
Title: Admiring with the Heart (4/?)
Author: lilpocketninja
Rating: R
Warnings: Gore and the aftermath there of (CSI-level stuff); language; more plot than romance.
Pairings: Kakashi/Iruka (eventually)
Notes: You can thank/blame Monopoly for the posting of this chapter. That is all.
"To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind." --Theophile Gautier
Kakashi stared out the window with longing, and then sighed just loud enough to be heard. He currently sat in the Hokage’s favorite conference room, ignoring her as she went over the jounin’s expenses and broke into drunken tirades about being forced to do the job of a low-level desk ninja. Kakashi doubted Iruka would appreciate that. The copy-nin found his thoughts strayed often to Iruka. The smallest things reminded Kakashi of him: walking by Icharaku Ramen, watching pre-genin play in the park, and seeing a dolphin toy in a shop window all echoed his former students’ former sensei. Because Kakashi was neither stupid nor inexperienced, he understood exactly what his thoughts meant, but he chose to firmly dismiss them rather than act. Though he could not deny Iruka’s attractiveness, things would never work between them. For one thing, Iruka seemed too emotionally healthy. The thought made Kakashi snort; his expression of amusement proved to be a mistake when it drew Tsunade’s attention - and ire.
“Do you think our current budget crisis is funny, Hatake?” She screeched as she launched a sake bottle at his head. Kakashi knew better than to dodge, so he let it shatter on the wall above his head and held still under the shower of glass and alcohol. Sobered by the loss of good booze, Tsunade deflated and waved one perfectly manicured hand in the air as she slumped over her conference table.
“Do better next year,” She mumbled, voice muffled because she had hidden her head in the crook of her arm. Taking the dismissal for what it was, the assembled jounin made a run for the door. The only signs of their presence a second later were two dozen empty Styrofoam cups and a chair that clattered to the floor after someone pushed it back too quickly. As he, too, escaped Kakashi saw Tsunade banging her bejeweled head on the table over his shoulder and he snickered.
On his way outside of Hokage Tower, he caught sight of her two Chunin assistants buzzing around the missions desk. Like everything else, the missions desk reminded him of Iruka. Four days since he had dropped the journals, and he had heard nothing from him yet. Did it take that long to translate a few books? Kakashi decided to check, in case Iruka had learned anything and also in case he might answer the door shirtless again.
After a few minute’s mental debate, Kakashi decided to take the rooftops instead of walking through the streets. Using only half of his speed, he soared over Konoha enjoying the almost-flight and taking in his surroundings with a veteran shinobi’s all-seeing eye. Even so, he heard the disturbance ahead before he saw it: the unmistakable crunch of bones breaking underfoot and wet squelch of feet kicking squishy bits. Recognizing the sounds of a fight - or a mobbing - for what they were, Kakashi slowed to a stop a block away from the fight.
Deciding caution would serve the situation more than speed, the copy-nin crept forward through the shadows in wide circles that spiraled every-closer to the cluster of ninja. Who ever was at the center of the group, Kakashi realized, was remaining completely silent even as half a dozen grown men beat him into the ground. Kakashi wondered why as he sent a single shrunken - the only one in his holster - flying into the enemies’ back. It hit its target and the man dropped while the others scattered, two making a grab at their prone victim only to fall a second later as Kakashi took advantage of their distraction and slit their throats. The attackers’ bodies dropped onto the prone man, but he shoved them off and rolled himself out of the rapidly expanding puddle of blood. Meanwhile, Kakashi caught one of the retreating ninja in a body-binding jutsu. His hold on it almost slipped when the badly-injured Konoha ninja whimpered.
The victim - Kakashi guessed male, but could not be sure - lay curled on the flat concrete roof, with his arm held close and a leg bent out behind him at an unnatural angle. Blood oozed from a head wound, glistening in the light and matting long, dark hair. The man had once worn a standard Konoha uniform, but now the vest lay several feet away and the blue jumpsuit hung shredded around the shivering frame
Without even glancing at his captive, Kakashi used the blunt handle of a kunai to knock him out and released the jutsu before kneeling beside his fellow Konoha shinobi. He had planned to check the man’s vitals, but as soon as Kakashi approached he reacted to the movement and flung a senbon at Kakashi’s head with surprising force and accuracy. Though he dodged, the blade clipped Kakashi’s hair before it embedded with a resounding whump in the wooden sign across the street. Moonlight caught the injured nin’s terrified face and Kakashi’s jaw clenched.
“Iruka!” He barked, hoping the panicked man would at least recognize his voice. Iruka clutched a kunai in one white-knuckled hand, but his tensed shoulders relaxed a fraction.
“Kakashi-sensei?” Iruka asked, his usually strong voice cracking on the last syllable and dissolving into furious coughing. Blood dripped from his swollen lips and down his chin, and Kakashi’s chest tightened with familiar worry. He wondered when Iruka had become on one the people he worried about.
“It’s me, Iruka,” he assured, stepping into the light with his hands held in the air, palms out, and trying to look as non-threatening as a legendary assassin possibly could. Iruka recognized him as soon as he stepped from the shadows and sagged with visible relief.
Kakashi stood above Iruka for a moment before dropping to his knees and running a worried hand over Iruka’s face. Iruka flinched away, either afraid of contact or in too much pain to be touched.
“Rock-nin,” the Chunin whispered, his voice harsh and low. “Five of them, rogues, lead by a man called Atisu. If you hurry you can catch them and -“
“We have to get you to a hospital right now, Iruka,” Kakashi said in a level voice, doing an admirable job of hiding the feeling of panic that wanted to escape.
“Atisu -“
“Can wait. Hold still.” Iruka quieted and stilled automatically as Kakashi channeled chakra through his body. Though he had tried to keep his voice light, Kakashi was worried about Iruka. It seemed like enough blood for two ninja coated the rooftop, and Kakashi could tell with a quick scan that the rock-nin had broken a leg, arm, and several ribs at least. Judging by Iruka’s coughing up blood, they had done some internal damage as well and Kakashi could only hope to stabilize his charge and get him to Tsunade. While he had seen people walk away from injuries much worse in his life, those people had not been suffering from extreme chakra depletion at the time.
“Okay. I don’t think you could handle being teleported right now, so I’m going to have to carry you.” Iruka made a small noise that sounded like agreement as Kakashi bit his thumb and spread it over a scroll from his pocket. Pakkun puffed into existence with a long-suffering sigh, but fell silent when he saw the state of Iruka and the rooftop.
“What’s going on, boss?” The dog asked, standing beside his master as Kakashi scooped Iruka into his arms. The Chunin schoolteacher proved more solid than Kakashi had thought and he stumbled a moment before shifting their balance and steadying himself.
“You need to lay off the ramen, sensei,” he muttered, and Iruka made a sound that was either a snort or a grunt of pain. Louder, Kakashi instructed Pakkun, “Get Bull to guard this guy-“ He indicated the unconscious captive with a jerk of his head - “and then go ahead to Tsunade and tell her to get ready to treat Iruka-sensei. After that, see to Ibiki in T&I and get him to pick this guy up and milk him for info on the orphanage attack, Iruka, and someone named Atisu.”
“Got it, boss,” Pakkun barked sharply before disappearing just as he had come. A few seconds later, Bull appeared. Kakashi did not pause long enough to greet him before taking off over the rooftops the way he had come.
Iruka’s head rested in the crook of Kakashi’s neck, and he could feel the man’s warm breath on his ear. It thrilled and terrified him all at once as the back part of his mind - Kakashi the human, not Kakashi the ninja - raced with other scenarios where he might feel Iruka’s breath on his neck. A hitch of that breath and a hiss through clenched teeth jerked Kakashi away from those fantasies, though, as he realized he had been fantasizing about a mortally wounded man.
“We’re almost there,” Kakashi whispered, unsure of what other assurance to offer. Finally the lights of the hospital became visible in the distance. Kakashi sped up, ignoring Iruka’s grunt of protest; the jounin felt the amount of blood soaking his uniform and feared for Iruka if they did not reach Tsunade quickly.
As soon as Kakashi’s feet touched the pavement in front of the hospital, four medical nin surged forward to snatch Iruka away and lay him out on a gurney. Tsunade stood a few feet back, but as soon as the group wheeled Iruka away she walked quickly to Kakashi, her high-heeled sandals clicking across the pavement.
“Are you hurt, brat?” She snapped, though the honest worry in her face belied the harsh tone of her voice. It was a contradiction Kakashi had long ago grown used to.
“Nope. Iruka’s got several broken bones and some kind of internal damage. He was attacked by a group of rouge stone-nin; I killed two and neutralized one. Iruka told me that their leader’s name was Atisu.”
Tsunade’s face reddened, and then paled. Kakashi nearly took a step backward as he felt the surge of angry chakra flowing around the sannin like an aura. Her tiny red mouth clenched in rage and her hands balled into shaking fists.
“Atisu,” She whispered; it was less of a question than a declaration of killing intent. “That bastard won’t last long in my village. Get the captured one to Ibiki and make sure he makes the bastard wish he were never born.” With that, she turned and stalked back into the hospital - and, Kakashi hoped, to treat Iruka. For a moment he stood outside, staring through the hospital’s glass doors and holding another mental debate. After a few seconds’ pause, he dashed after the Hokage, who immediately whipped around and glared at him.
“What?” She demanded, still walking but looking over her shoulder. Kakashi hurried behind her.
“Pakkun is getting Ibiki, Bull is guarding the prisoner. I want to be hear when Iruka comes out of surgery.”
Tsunade did stop now, and gave him a shrewd if pleased look. Kakashi raised his visible eyebrow at her smug half-smile and wondered what he was missing. She said nothing, however, just continued walking and flipping through the thick document Kakashi recognized as Iruka’s medical file.
“Tsunade-sensei!” A familiar voice called out from down the corridor, and a pink head darted between people to join the pair. Sakura’s face was pinched with worry.
“Sakura-chan. You’re back early,” Kakashi commented, enjoying frustrating his former pupil despite the gravity of the situation. The young kunoichi scowled at him before turning to Tsunade even as the three of them pushed into the ICU’s lobby.
“I heard Iruka-sensei is a patient! What happened?” She asked, her voice holding no trace of the whining, simpering girl she had been only a year ago.
“He was attacked. Several broken bones, possible internal bleeding. You’re assisting on examination and surgery. You,” now she spoke to Kakashi, “Sit here and wait.” Tsunade indicated a cluster of uncomfortable chairs. Kakashi sat obediently as the two women walked further into the unit and past the swinging double doors into surgery.
Kakashi’s back began to protest, and as he shifted to find a comfortable position he looked around. Only now, in the quiet and surpassingly empty waiting room did he wonder at his decision to stay here rather than join in the interrogating or track the runaway attackers. He told himself that he had a vested interest in Iruka’s survival because only he could translate the journals. Besides, Iruka seemed to have no one else: his parents were dead, their names traced on the memorial stone, and the boy who considered him a father had gone on a journey with no known end. Someone, Kakashi felt, should be there when you came out of an operation. He had spent those first difficult hours of consciousness alone too many times not to empathize.
The hours crawled by slowly, marked by the tick-tick-ticking of a wall clock somewhere down the hall. For the first two, Kakashi read Icha Icha, but then he finished and had to shuffle around in the pile of ancient magazines looking for something else. ‘Home and Garden’ took up exactly five minutes of his time, and then he was left with nothing but to stare at the white walls of the lobby. He fidgeted, whishing he had something to do. The time stretched on and Kakashi shifted in the hard chair yet again and contemplated the pros and cons of causing mayhem in the Hokage’s hospital. Before his mind-numbing boredom could drive the copy-nin to do any thing mischievous or disruptive, the Shizune came back through the double doors.
The young medic-nin’s shoulders slumped with exhaustion and her hands shook where they hung limply at her sides; she half-sat, half-fell into the chair beside Kakashi. He gave her a long sideways look as she caught her breath.
“He’s stable. Tsunade says he ought to be back on his feet in a few weeks, but it might be a while before he can perform any basic jutsu.” Kakashi nodded, he had expected as much.
“Can I see him?” Shizune looked startled, then scowled.
“Kakashi-sensei. Iruka-sensei isn’t even awake. He can’t possibly help you with your mission!” Her voice rose and took on the same tone Kakashi had heard her use when she scolded the Hokage. Kakashi held his hands up in a universal gesture of peace.
“I just wanted to see him. As a friend.” The medic still looked unconvinced, and Kakashi wondered about her relationship with Iruka. Look underneath the underneath was his motto, after all, but before he could draw any conclusions about the sensei and Shizune, Sakura and Tsunade stumbled through the door, leaning on each other. Sakura looked up at Kakashi and smiled softly before dropping onto the floor and leaving the Hokage to stand on her own. Kakashi vacated his chair for the swaying woman and she accepted it with a rare grateful smile. A long moment of silence passed before Shizune cleared her throat and turned to her mentor.
“Tsunade-sama, Kakashi-sensei wishes to visit Iruka-sensei. I told him that Iruka won’t be awake for a while-“ Tsunade’s sharp gaze turned to Kakashi and her mouth twisted into what might be an amused smirk. As he waited for her response, Kakashi wondered again if he were missing something and hoped that in her exhaustion the Hokage would pass on the chance to tease him about something he did not want examined too closely. Much to Shizune’s displeasure, Tsunade nodded her permission without comment.
“But, Tsunade-sama-“ The darker woman began. The Hokage held up her hand against the protests. From where she sat and leaned against the wall, Sakura watched the interaction between her tow mentors through half-closed eyes.
“He’s in room 314,” Tsunade called to Kakashi’s already retreating back; he held up his hand in a half-salute, half-acknowledgement.
True to Shizune’s words, Iruka lay in the hospital cot unconscious. Several purple bruises peppered the teacher’s dark skin and his cracked lips moved with the struggle to draw in air. Otherwise the room lay completely silent and shrouded in darkness. Kakashi’s sharp eye picked out a chair - a copy of the torture devices from the surgical waiting room - and he dropped onto the cool tile floor. Without trying, Kakashi found his breath falling into the same ragged, even pattern as Iruka’s and he felt his eyes drooping.
A few hours later found the sun glaring through the thin hospital curtains and Kakashi suddenly awake but unwilling to open his eyes. He groaned, from the headache and the cracking in his back as he slowly uncurled from his position on the hard floor.
From somewhere above him, he heard a snort and forced his eye open to look into the amused face of Iruka, who was leaning over the bed and observing Kakashi try to recover feeling in his legs.
“I’m getting old,” said the copy-nin as he climbed to his feet with the support of the wall. Iruka grinned, then winced as the movement irritated the bruised skin on his face. The silence stretched and became awkward, as Iruka stared at his bandaged knuckles and Kakashi stared at Iruka.
Then, as though remembering something important, Iruka’s eyes opened wide and he turned to Kakashi and grabbed him by the shoulders.
“Atisu,” He ground out between gritted teeth, and Kakashi realized he had never seen the man this angry, even when he chased after his errant students. Then, he had affection and concern for their well being behind his loud frustration, but now his eyes flashed and his jaw clenched and he radiated cold, objective ferocity.
“Atisu?” Kakashi repeated, slowly and in the same tone he might use to calm a nindog gone feral. It did no good, and Iruka clasped his arms tighter, squeezing the shuriken holder until it dug into Kakashi’s shoulder.
“The man who attacked me,” Iruka also spoke slowly, but in a tone which suggested he was speaking to a very young, very stupid child.
“He escaped.” Kakashi wiggled in Iruka’s grasp, unwilling to escape at the cost of further harming an injured man. Iruka’s hands unclenched and as they dropped to his sides Kakashi saw that they had gone pale, as had Iruka’s face as his angry flush drained away and he sagged.
“You didn’t follow him?” Iruka asked. Though he now sat limply on the cot, his voice still carried an undercurrent of anger, and Kakashi sensed he might explode again at any moment.
“No. You were looking pretty bad, and if you didn’t get to a hospital you would’ve bled out.”
“Catching that man was way more important than rescuing me, Kakashi-san.” The tone reminded Kakashi of something else, years ago, and he spat out the rejoinder without conscious thought.
“Those that abandon their comrades are worse than trash.” Kakashi expected an argument, but received none. Instead Iruka resumed staring at his hands for a long time before he looked up with the same desperation and - was it sadness? Kakashi only had a moment to analyze it before it slipped from Iruka’s face, replaced by the calm outer shell of a serious shinobi. Dark eyes crinkled with determination.
“They’re after Naruto. Atisu wants the Kyuubi, and I’m almost certain I know why.”
“You finished translating the journals?”
“No, I’m only about halfway through the first. But it’s all information on orphans around Naruto’s age and Atisu specializes in chakra-theft.” Something about the catch in Iruka’s voice made Kakashi pause before he asked his next question, unsure if trodding somewhere so raw would really benefit the mission.
Ultimately, though, Konoha came before her shinobi’s personal feelings and dramas. The question had to be asked no matter how much Kakashi wanted to avoid it.
“You’ve tangled with him before, right? Tell me what you know.” Iruka looked as though Kakashi had slapped him, though Kakashi suspected the Chunin and anticipated the question. Suspecting that an answer might be a while in coming, Kakashi leaned against a wall and gazed out the window, giving Iruka a moment to collect his thoughts. The man curled into himself, tucking his knees under his chin as Kakashi watched him out of the corner of his eye. Iruka drew a deep breath and let it out slowly through his nose.
“I met him when I was a genin. It was during the war; Tsunade-sense was needed outside the village and insisted our team would be fine going with her. A few miles into Earth, we run into a whole squad of Rock jounin. If it had just been five or six, sensei could’ve taken them no problem, but twenty elite jounin to one sannin and three green genin? No way.” Kakashi continued to look out the window as Iruka spoke, following the paths of patients and medic-nin below in the courtyard. He thought about stopping Iruka, going to find out what he needed from Tsunade, but that hitching voice hypnotized him. So Kakashi remained silent, and an observer might have guessed he had fallen asleep standing up. Iruka paused to collect himself and the room’s silence was complete except for birds chirping in the tree outside and the distant hospital clatter.
“She-“ Iruka began again, but whatever ‘she’ did would remain a mystery because as he spoke the stillness broke. A large, fierce nurse - the same that had glared hat him a week earlier, Kakashi’s nursing nemesis - bustled through the door carrying a tray of bland food and a thick blanket. She stopped at the sight of Kakashi and narrowed her eyes. Dark, thick eyebrows drew down over her squinting eyes and her thick brow cast a shadow that reached down nearly to her tight scowl.
“You,” She hissed, and Iruka jumped as though he had only just been drawn out of his on memory by her sharp nasal voice. Kakashi regarded her calmly.
“Maa, what did Iruka do to piss you off?” He asked, in the same drawl he used to taunt his students and other troublesome people in his path. “He’s kind of a loudmouth, but he’s really an okay guy-“
“You, out!” The nurse hissed, and to demonstrate she pointed a thick red finger shaking with rage. Kakashi watched Iruka’s reaction, instead of hers, and was rewarded with seeing the teacher struggle to hide a grin behind a bandaged hand.
“Kicking out a patient?” Why, nurse-san, you should be ashamed! This man needs you help, and just because he’s kind of obnoxious-“ This time the nurse grab bed Kakashi by the collar of his uniform vest and goose-stepped over to the door. Though he could think of at least twenty ways to kill her without trying, Kakashi dragged along in her wake without protest. She had opened her mouth to tell him off, but they both froze at the sound from the bed. Iruka was laughing. It started with a chuckle, then a snort, then he lost it. Kakashi slumped with relief in the nurse’s grasp; over the years he had discovered that laughing, not crying, gave the catharsis Iruka badly needed.
“I’m gong, I’m going,” The copy-nin grumbled to the nurse as soon as Iruka’s wave of hilarity settled from its manic high to a reflective silence punctuated by the occasional giggle. Kakashi willingly left the room, satisfied with himself.
“Kakashi-sensei! Wait!” Iruka called. Kakashi half-turned at the doorway.
“Um. I’m going to get bored, so I was wondering if you could bring me something to read.” He put curious weight on the last words and Kakashi remembered their conversation a week earlier, though he was tempted to purposefully misunderstand and show up tomorrow with ‘The Complete Icha Icha Box Set.’
“Yeah, sure,” he replied easily and gave a miniature salute. This time Kakashi didn’t look back; he had to go see a man about a rock.
-To Be Continued-