bye bye Mocha....

[lilpixiefish]

my dog died this morning. I had to watch him covered in vomit and feces breathing like he had 100 punds of brins on his rib cage.... work wouldn't let me go home even though I got to work only 25 minutes after he went... bastards... I couldn't stop crying at work and my department manager didn't care she just kept ordering me around and all... I seriously wanted to punch her. So we're having him cremated and probably scattering his ashes in the back yard.... burrying him wouldn't be a good idea because of of the rain. He was perfectly fine just a week ago... then his leg went bad, but other than that he was fine... the vet we took him to for the cremation thinks he had a massive heart attack sometime last night and then a stroke this morning (which would explain why he was lying in his own feces and couldn't move). He collapsed this morning around 7am and yeah.... he died around 7:25am.... I still don't want to accept that I'll never see him again, I mean, I've lived with him for the past almost 12 years and now he's gone for good.... it really makes you realize how little you appreciate your pets before they die, and having to watch your family member die like that is just heart-wrenching. I went nuts when I realized he was dead... I went to make sure he was doing okay because my dad said his breathing had just gotten shallow but that he was still alive, but after checking for a pulse and having nothing there, checking for breathe and nothing there and finally waving my hand past his eye (he was lying on his side) and him not even flinching I basically just broke down... not pretty.

blah.... I feel like crap.

I will miss my 'Smelly Puppy Boy'.... he will always be the best dog ever, no dog could ever replace him.