wild world...
mostly taken from my myspace blog.
I got two major shocks in one day. The first is not important because I have come to peace with the situation, and my role in it. I now feel nothing but pity for those responsible for their own mess. Good luck with yourself, you've got some things to work out.
Second, I recieved news that my (last remaining) grandfather died this morning of a heart attack. This was my dad's father. He had been happily married to my grandmother for 58 years and raised two sons, and cared for four grandchildren and one great grandson. I was his favorite. Always was. He said there was something about me that separated me from my freakshow family. He always said I was special, that I was going places. And that he'd kick the ass of anyone who tried to get in my way. (if he were here today, he'd have some ass kicking to do...) He made the best apple sauce ever created, he worked his hardest and managed to be the only man over 80 to challenge the excecutives at stop and shop. He was stubborn as all hell and always looked out for me. He will be greatly missed, but forever remembered. Sal Vinci died at the age of 83. But, then again, he never really grew old.
I'm writing and delivering his eulogy for the funeral on tuesday. He told me once that he didn't want just any jackass to do it, so I promised him I would. And that is one promise I am not breaking.
I didn't want to be around my family, so I hid away in my room for a while in disbeliefe. Justin Carville had asked me to call him, and for some reason I did. That's when I lost it. I bawled on the phone for a good 15 minutes, sobbing about everything that had happened and how I couldn't handle it and how in shock I was. And to my suprise, he understood. He didn't say anything stupid or try to hang up like I'd expected. Instead he told me that it was ok to cry, and let me do it. When I was done he told me about how he felt when his great aunt died and how he understood how hard loss was. Then he let me get everything out that was on my mind. I told him all about alex and how pissed off I was and then about how weird everything in my life was at that moment in time. And he just...got it. And after all was said and done, he did his best to cheer me up and make me laugh. It wasn't my intention to spend an hour and a half on the phone with him, ranting, but I did. and it was nice. and I feel better.
Katrina was also a MAJOR help. she calmed me down yesterday and despite all of her own issues to deal with, she still supported me with mine. We're going shopping tomorrow and that will be awesome. can't wait. LOVE U KATRINA!!! :)
Sorry I missed Meg's party! I wanted to go, but I wasn't exactly in a fiesta mood considering everything. But, a Merry Christmas to you all!
ok, I'm gonna go make clam chowder now.
wow. that's a lot of living in one month. it's a wild world, isn't it.
I got two major shocks in one day. The first is not important because I have come to peace with the situation, and my role in it. I now feel nothing but pity for those responsible for their own mess. Good luck with yourself, you've got some things to work out.
Second, I recieved news that my (last remaining) grandfather died this morning of a heart attack. This was my dad's father. He had been happily married to my grandmother for 58 years and raised two sons, and cared for four grandchildren and one great grandson. I was his favorite. Always was. He said there was something about me that separated me from my freakshow family. He always said I was special, that I was going places. And that he'd kick the ass of anyone who tried to get in my way. (if he were here today, he'd have some ass kicking to do...) He made the best apple sauce ever created, he worked his hardest and managed to be the only man over 80 to challenge the excecutives at stop and shop. He was stubborn as all hell and always looked out for me. He will be greatly missed, but forever remembered. Sal Vinci died at the age of 83. But, then again, he never really grew old.
I'm writing and delivering his eulogy for the funeral on tuesday. He told me once that he didn't want just any jackass to do it, so I promised him I would. And that is one promise I am not breaking.
I didn't want to be around my family, so I hid away in my room for a while in disbeliefe. Justin Carville had asked me to call him, and for some reason I did. That's when I lost it. I bawled on the phone for a good 15 minutes, sobbing about everything that had happened and how I couldn't handle it and how in shock I was. And to my suprise, he understood. He didn't say anything stupid or try to hang up like I'd expected. Instead he told me that it was ok to cry, and let me do it. When I was done he told me about how he felt when his great aunt died and how he understood how hard loss was. Then he let me get everything out that was on my mind. I told him all about alex and how pissed off I was and then about how weird everything in my life was at that moment in time. And he just...got it. And after all was said and done, he did his best to cheer me up and make me laugh. It wasn't my intention to spend an hour and a half on the phone with him, ranting, but I did. and it was nice. and I feel better.
Katrina was also a MAJOR help. she calmed me down yesterday and despite all of her own issues to deal with, she still supported me with mine. We're going shopping tomorrow and that will be awesome. can't wait. LOVE U KATRINA!!! :)
Sorry I missed Meg's party! I wanted to go, but I wasn't exactly in a fiesta mood considering everything. But, a Merry Christmas to you all!
ok, I'm gonna go make clam chowder now.
wow. that's a lot of living in one month. it's a wild world, isn't it.