(no subject)
i can't explain myself to him anymore, and when i try, it makes no sense. and i feel like he thinks i'm crazy anyway, no matter what i say. i feel like i'm going crazy just trying to make this work. i get so stressed out and upset just trying to explain myself to him and how he doesn't understand anything. when he thinks he does. he tells me what i think and feel and he has no idea what i really think and feel. we were doing so good this week, i couldn't wait to see and talk to him every single day. then when we get into a big fight, it's a reminder to myself that nothing's changed, and it's never going to. so when i get so upset about our fight, he doesn't understand why. it makes me feel like he doesn't care enough about us. i feel like i'm unwanted and constantly looked passed. i feel like he's not trying at all, and he feels i'm not trying. when i'm really giving it all of my energy. i thought god put us together for a reason, but now i can't see myself dealing with this the rest of my life. yet, i can't picture myself without him.