There's got to be more to life...
My Christmas was good as I hope everyone else's was. Vacation was ok. Monday I found out that my car needed to get work done, $1,000 dollars worth, but my dad paid thank god. I worked 11-3 Tuesday-Thursday. Tuesday I went to Bob's and Wednesday I just headed out for the night, Thursday after work I went with Steven to pick up Pats tickets then we went to the mall. We were supposed to go to Boston on Friday but we didn't. Saturday I worked on my senior project then went to Steven's for the night and Sunday we went to the Patriots game!
You don't have to read the next part if you don't want to...it's just stuff I've had on my mind.
I don't know where to start so I'll start with school stuff. I really do not like cheerleading anymore and part of me really wants to quit. I feel like the only reason I haven't yet is because it's my senior year and my last chance to cheer. It just is not at all fun and it stresses me out, I have absolutely nothing good to say about it. When I have no practice I couldn't be happier, I don't miss it one bit.
Work is next. I need a job and that is the only reason I'm still there. People shopping are rude, the job is boring and I mess up alot. I get shitty hours and paid crap. I need a better job. The people are nice but I only really talk to a few of them. They all know each other because they've worked there forever, I'm the new one so I feel on the outside. Weird because I've never dealt with that feeling before.
The whole college thing is winding down. I'm probably going to JWU but I have this feeling I shouldn't. Ever since I was little, no matter what I say about my parents, I felt this feeling like I had to try to please them when it came to school because I fell short everywhere else. I feel like I am a disappointment to my mom especially, I've always kinda felt that way but it just gets stronger as I get older.
I didn't really think about this next thing until I read Amanda's entry. I can still remember when me Kim and Amanda did something at least once every week. We were always getting together even if it was to just hang out at someone's house. As time moved on people got job's and other stuff changed and we saw each other less and less and now Amanda is in NC and I've seen Kim once in Oct. when we went to Applebee's one night. I wicked miss having that with someone because I don't have it at all. I talk to pretty much everyone in school and I go to my share of parties but it just isn't the same. I don't have a group of people that will always be there even if it is just to hang out at someone's house. Part of me can't wait for college because I want to meet new people and try to get back what I had at one point.
The last thing is just me. I wish that I could be fully trusting and not second guess people. I wish I wasn't as jealous and insucure as I know I am. Recently these things have become more obvious and stronger and I don't think it's fair. Not that he is perfect because trust me he's not but I don't understand why after almost 9 months I feel like this.
Well there's more..alot more but I am tired of typing.
You don't have to read the next part if you don't want to...it's just stuff I've had on my mind.
I don't know where to start so I'll start with school stuff. I really do not like cheerleading anymore and part of me really wants to quit. I feel like the only reason I haven't yet is because it's my senior year and my last chance to cheer. It just is not at all fun and it stresses me out, I have absolutely nothing good to say about it. When I have no practice I couldn't be happier, I don't miss it one bit.
Work is next. I need a job and that is the only reason I'm still there. People shopping are rude, the job is boring and I mess up alot. I get shitty hours and paid crap. I need a better job. The people are nice but I only really talk to a few of them. They all know each other because they've worked there forever, I'm the new one so I feel on the outside. Weird because I've never dealt with that feeling before.
The whole college thing is winding down. I'm probably going to JWU but I have this feeling I shouldn't. Ever since I was little, no matter what I say about my parents, I felt this feeling like I had to try to please them when it came to school because I fell short everywhere else. I feel like I am a disappointment to my mom especially, I've always kinda felt that way but it just gets stronger as I get older.
I didn't really think about this next thing until I read Amanda's entry. I can still remember when me Kim and Amanda did something at least once every week. We were always getting together even if it was to just hang out at someone's house. As time moved on people got job's and other stuff changed and we saw each other less and less and now Amanda is in NC and I've seen Kim once in Oct. when we went to Applebee's one night. I wicked miss having that with someone because I don't have it at all. I talk to pretty much everyone in school and I go to my share of parties but it just isn't the same. I don't have a group of people that will always be there even if it is just to hang out at someone's house. Part of me can't wait for college because I want to meet new people and try to get back what I had at one point.
The last thing is just me. I wish that I could be fully trusting and not second guess people. I wish I wasn't as jealous and insucure as I know I am. Recently these things have become more obvious and stronger and I don't think it's fair. Not that he is perfect because trust me he's not but I don't understand why after almost 9 months I feel like this.
Well there's more..alot more but I am tired of typing.