(no subject)
I meant to post this when it happened (Friday night) but forgot.
I took the bus home from work, and sat near the front. Not long after I got on, a woman got on who knew the bus driver. She sat right behind her and they had a long (and loud) conversation. It was amusing. It got more so when the friend told the driver about her new man.
Friend: Giiiirl, he so sweet to me!
Driver: Girl, they ALL sweet -- when you furs' together.
Friend: Nah, but... he...
Driver [with the darkest skepticism]: MmmHM. They ALL sweet -- at furs'.
Friend: But...
Driver: Girl, yo' ex-HUZZBAND sweet... [pause, then great emphasis] -- AT FURS'.
Friend [subdued]: Well, he crazy.
Then a man of about sixty, halfway down the aisle, shouted laughingly, "Y'all stop that man-bashin' up there! I hear you! We ain't all like dat! I'm a GOOD man!"
Driver [bellowing]: AWW, BOO! You ain't need to git no ATTITUDE!
[Yes, she called him "Boo." Everyone on the bus was laughing.]
Man: Lookahere, I'm a GOOD man! I got a job, and I look good...I ain't lyin'...
Driver [promptly]: Stand up and model fo' me.
[She was stopped at a traffic light, so she flipped the interior light on. More laughter from everyone, including the man, who didn't stand up.]
Driver [unfazed]: Well, I check you out when you get off the bus.
Friend [giggling]: Giiiirrrl, you crazy!
Man [calmly]: I gi' you my number! I LIKE a workin' woman.
[More laughter from all parties.]
Then, alas, it was time for my stop. I almost wanted to stay on the bus, just to hear what else happened. Hee!
(When Boy gets out of line next, as he so often does, I'm going to shout, "AWW, BOO! You ain't need to git no ATTITUDE!")
I took the bus home from work, and sat near the front. Not long after I got on, a woman got on who knew the bus driver. She sat right behind her and they had a long (and loud) conversation. It was amusing. It got more so when the friend told the driver about her new man.
Friend: Giiiirl, he so sweet to me!
Driver: Girl, they ALL sweet -- when you furs' together.
Friend: Nah, but... he...
Driver [with the darkest skepticism]: MmmHM. They ALL sweet -- at furs'.
Friend: But...
Driver: Girl, yo' ex-HUZZBAND sweet... [pause, then great emphasis] -- AT FURS'.
Friend [subdued]: Well, he crazy.
Then a man of about sixty, halfway down the aisle, shouted laughingly, "Y'all stop that man-bashin' up there! I hear you! We ain't all like dat! I'm a GOOD man!"
Driver [bellowing]: AWW, BOO! You ain't need to git no ATTITUDE!
[Yes, she called him "Boo." Everyone on the bus was laughing.]
Man: Lookahere, I'm a GOOD man! I got a job, and I look good...I ain't lyin'...
Driver [promptly]: Stand up and model fo' me.
[She was stopped at a traffic light, so she flipped the interior light on. More laughter from everyone, including the man, who didn't stand up.]
Driver [unfazed]: Well, I check you out when you get off the bus.
Friend [giggling]: Giiiirrrl, you crazy!
Man [calmly]: I gi' you my number! I LIKE a workin' woman.
[More laughter from all parties.]
Then, alas, it was time for my stop. I almost wanted to stay on the bus, just to hear what else happened. Hee!
(When Boy gets out of line next, as he so often does, I'm going to shout, "AWW, BOO! You ain't need to git no ATTITUDE!")