i'm back
man my week has sucked....well kind of ..........my mom told me i was worthless and it really hurt me.......and i've been trying really hard to be a good kid and not cuss and do bad kid stuff, but now.....you know what i say .........screw it .........that's what i say.....i'll say what i wanna say to who ever i want to say it to......so yea....but i dunno life just sucks when you disappoint someone who you love....it really does...but yea...man school is almost over and i so excited...really really excited...man i want to party hard all summmer long....and go fishin....hahahahaha jonah k is good at fishin.....and i'm playing little league softball....yea....i will dominate....yea freakin right....but anyway katie i miss you and can't wait for you to come in ....we have district playoffs monday, but that won't go very good becasue of the drama going on......love you brooke nicole....Man i can't believe that me and eddie have been dating for two years..i love him so much....he makes me feel so good about myself......Wow speakin of the devil, he just called me, we are going to the movies tonight to watch the III star wars movie....but yea...I love him so much and we've been through so much together.....my one wish for all of you out there is that you will be blessed with a love like me and eddie have....It's a very bumpy road...but it's all worth it....every last tear.....he's my soul mate i know it and i can't wait to spend the rest of my life with him.....but anyway, but back to my mom...is there anyone else out there that feels there life is pointless due to a parent....i try so hard to please her, but it seems that the harder i try....the more that she is disappointed in me...and i can't stand that feeling i really can't .....the only thing that is getting me through now and days, is my friends, eddie and alma, who is such a mother figure to me....i love her so much ....i can alway s turn to her no matter what and she'll be there for me ....i wish me and my mom could have a relationship like that, but eddie says you can't make someone love you and really can't so i don't think i'm going to try anymore, i'll just acept the fact that i will never have the perfect relationship with my mom....which really sucs, i have alot of love for life and the people in it why can't i get that back....ya know...but anyway on to something more positive....i'm on a new diet type thing and i'm doin pretty good, i've lost a little weight but not to much yet, so yea, but i'm tryin....and i'm going to long john's after work...haven't eatten there yet and it's been here for several weeks, but it's always packed so it's hard to get in....but yea....this summer i'm going to the beach and im so excited to get a nice tan and swim in the ocean but yea well im going to go now that i have bored all of you to death love ya'll holla