Just a lot of thoughts that i had to write down...
Ok so i know it has been forever and a day since i have updated but my internet has been down and so i mean it really isnt my fault right? Some things that have happened are...my uncle found a kitten and gave it to me to take care of and omg she is so cute i want to keep her but my mom will never go for it so the next best thing is to get my aunt to take her. What else...oh yeah danielle went up north today and i miss her already...i was sad when i didnt get to see her yesterday cause it will be a while:( Um i feel stupid cause i havent mentioned that it is summer yet lol but thats an obvious highlight! Umm...i finished up drivers training segment 2 today YAY! I also have money from all the babysitting i am doing. Im really sad that andrea is grounded i really miss seeing her, she is my bestest friend and i havent talked to her for days, there is seriously something wrong here! I might be able to go up north next week the only thing is is that it would be with all my little cousins and well they are really crazy and i dont know if i can handle them lol!! We'll see huh. Oh yeah i went out with my Aunt Cindy today and i got 2 really cute skirts and 2 adorable shirts!! YAY 4 shopping! i also got some pretty eye shadow and some new body splashes from victoria secrets!! thanx to my aunt cindy 100%! I have been chilling with danielle my neighbor watching the Pistons, omg they are amazing i cant wait for the next game!!! The won by 31 fricken point yesterday i mean thats great!! I so hope we do that well on sunday too!! I have also hung out with matt once that was fun and i hope we chill again soon. I get to be kevins date to his brothers wedding, that should be interesting but fun! Um thats all that has really happened that you would care to here cause my life is just so boring right!
Um another thing is boys, i know i am such a boy hater but i mean i have my reasons ok. I have been hurt twice this year and i in the beginning was so set on just being single haveing fun and just not even giving boys a real thought relationship wise. I know that life isnt perfect and not everyboy you like or go for are going to work out or treat you right but i mean how come it had to happen three times in a row! Summer of 2004, Winter of 2005, and Spring of 2005! Ugh, boys just really piss me off ya know. I mean they are always leading girls on, and always jsut breaking girls hearts and confusing us too! I have forgiven these two boys inparticular and are friends with both but i mean its hard to forget it, i am trying though cause one of the boys has changed and well likes me again and the other feels bad and claims he didnt mean too but he just needs to not lead girls on like he seems to like to do! I like a certain boy right now but i mean i am not sure if i want to be more than friends with him becuase i know he is going away and i dont want to get attached and i also was kinda just looking for a summer of flings and hookups cause im young and its time to just have some fun! But on the other hand i just catch myself thinking about him and wanting to be around him and well you get the point lol i just cant make up my mind and it doesnt help that i dont know what he is thinking either ugh darn boys!! I hate them thats all i have to say:)
Last thing for tonight is well just about me becoming who i want to. I have been doing a lot of thinking and listening and stuff and maybe im finally ready to get back to my faith and improve me and my qaulity of life. Seeing how much my bff has been pulled back to her own faith and slowly watching her change has helped me a little bit. Also i am really excited for Kentucky with andrea and just growing spiritually too! I love helping people but the whole witnessing thing is really going to push me and will help me grow, i am so secretive about my faith i dont like to let it show to anyone cuase i am afraid of being ridiculed and disliked because of it i guess, my best friend like cant stand to here my express myself and like is so closed minded to what i think and feel and believe when it comes to my faith and that hurts but my other best friend is the only person i really got that thinks like me and well i thank the lord for her! If i didnt have her i dont know where i would be and i dont kno where she would be without me, i think we really help each other and im tired of hiding who i am. Also i am sorta thought of as a prude for having such strong morals and sticking to them but i mean i like that about me, its what really makes me stick out from a lot of other girls and not to say that i am the only one who thinks the way i do cause im not but i mean im proud of myself for it! I like knowing that if i really want to do something i can and my morals say that cuase ive met a boy or two who would of like to of done stuff and i just dont go for it...but enough of this lol who cares right, im just writing now for me,writing is just what i love to do and it clears my head and makes me calm and happy! I love it. Writing and reading, i love to read definitely!
But i am done for tonight and this is a long entry for not having updated in a while i think! So goodnight everybody and comment if you want to...
thought for tonight...
Why do people feel the need to fit in so bad? What do you think?
Um another thing is boys, i know i am such a boy hater but i mean i have my reasons ok. I have been hurt twice this year and i in the beginning was so set on just being single haveing fun and just not even giving boys a real thought relationship wise. I know that life isnt perfect and not everyboy you like or go for are going to work out or treat you right but i mean how come it had to happen three times in a row! Summer of 2004, Winter of 2005, and Spring of 2005! Ugh, boys just really piss me off ya know. I mean they are always leading girls on, and always jsut breaking girls hearts and confusing us too! I have forgiven these two boys inparticular and are friends with both but i mean its hard to forget it, i am trying though cause one of the boys has changed and well likes me again and the other feels bad and claims he didnt mean too but he just needs to not lead girls on like he seems to like to do! I like a certain boy right now but i mean i am not sure if i want to be more than friends with him becuase i know he is going away and i dont want to get attached and i also was kinda just looking for a summer of flings and hookups cause im young and its time to just have some fun! But on the other hand i just catch myself thinking about him and wanting to be around him and well you get the point lol i just cant make up my mind and it doesnt help that i dont know what he is thinking either ugh darn boys!! I hate them thats all i have to say:)
Last thing for tonight is well just about me becoming who i want to. I have been doing a lot of thinking and listening and stuff and maybe im finally ready to get back to my faith and improve me and my qaulity of life. Seeing how much my bff has been pulled back to her own faith and slowly watching her change has helped me a little bit. Also i am really excited for Kentucky with andrea and just growing spiritually too! I love helping people but the whole witnessing thing is really going to push me and will help me grow, i am so secretive about my faith i dont like to let it show to anyone cuase i am afraid of being ridiculed and disliked because of it i guess, my best friend like cant stand to here my express myself and like is so closed minded to what i think and feel and believe when it comes to my faith and that hurts but my other best friend is the only person i really got that thinks like me and well i thank the lord for her! If i didnt have her i dont know where i would be and i dont kno where she would be without me, i think we really help each other and im tired of hiding who i am. Also i am sorta thought of as a prude for having such strong morals and sticking to them but i mean i like that about me, its what really makes me stick out from a lot of other girls and not to say that i am the only one who thinks the way i do cause im not but i mean im proud of myself for it! I like knowing that if i really want to do something i can and my morals say that cuase ive met a boy or two who would of like to of done stuff and i just dont go for it...but enough of this lol who cares right, im just writing now for me,writing is just what i love to do and it clears my head and makes me calm and happy! I love it. Writing and reading, i love to read definitely!
But i am done for tonight and this is a long entry for not having updated in a while i think! So goodnight everybody and comment if you want to...
thought for tonight...
Why do people feel the need to fit in so bad? What do you think?