(no subject)
The way things have unfolded make me sad and angry and frustrated. It's not often that as an adult you make a good friend and then to feel like mere acquaintances or strangers with that person again within the course of a year is disheartening.
I should have said something sooner.. And I did say something. But it happened again and again. How can you want to bring up something that is bothering you in order to work through it when the nature of what's bothering you shows inconsiderate-ness and a disregard for the friendship? I feel hurt and though with the time that has passed, it's getting easier to move on, he is friends with my friends and friends with my cousin. There is no escape. I see him at the gym with whoever he goes to the gym with now. When I hear of him spending time with people I introduced him to without me, it stirs up anger and a hatefulness that feels foreign to me and I don't like it. Yet, now, he is friends with my friends and friends with my cousin. Now, I put on the face that things are ok so that it isn't weird for my friends or my cousin. I would never tell them to not be friends or to not spend time together. They are friends outside of me.
Inside it still hurts. Inside, I want the hateful feelings to go away...
I should have said something sooner.. And I did say something. But it happened again and again. How can you want to bring up something that is bothering you in order to work through it when the nature of what's bothering you shows inconsiderate-ness and a disregard for the friendship? I feel hurt and though with the time that has passed, it's getting easier to move on, he is friends with my friends and friends with my cousin. There is no escape. I see him at the gym with whoever he goes to the gym with now. When I hear of him spending time with people I introduced him to without me, it stirs up anger and a hatefulness that feels foreign to me and I don't like it. Yet, now, he is friends with my friends and friends with my cousin. Now, I put on the face that things are ok so that it isn't weird for my friends or my cousin. I would never tell them to not be friends or to not spend time together. They are friends outside of me.
Inside it still hurts. Inside, I want the hateful feelings to go away...