I'm ready for a hardcore nap...
Lately i have been so busy and stressed. My schedule is insane...i never have enough time to do my homework...i never get sleep....im just breaking down....
I had two hard tests this week...that i started studying for late at night and then finished studying for in the wee hours of the morning before class...i just can't keep doing this...
I know its my own fault because i get myself in over my head and involved in too many things...but thats just how i am...then i end up going crazy trying to do it all...which is what i am doing now....
Tuesday i had my 8:30 Child Dev class and we had a test....i woke up at 6 to finish studying for it....i wasn't very happy with my performance i dont think....i think the multiple choice i did alright but the essays were kinda difficult for me...they involved all that wacky genetics crap that just confuses me...boo....then i had to go see my spanish teacher to explain something before my spanish test on wed...studied spanish for a bit...went to lunch...ED300 i had a break down...that class is so mentally exhausting...he asked us to figure out a question that i just didnt understand and i was frustrated and everyone was butting heads and trying to explain it and i just started to cry...ridiculous i know....im just so stressed out, tired...and i had that stupid child dev test that morning and a spanish test to study for that night and no time to do it in......it was just not a good moment...everyone at my table just kinda of looked at me and was like its ohk we can do it just take a breath...luckily it was basically just my sorority sisters who knew what i was going through....so that sucked...then i had to work from 2:30-4:30 and i had choir from 4:30-5:30...UNYK at 8 and yell at 9...by the time i got done i was so exahusted...i stayed up till 1:30 trying to get everything memorized for spanish and then got up at 7 to finish what i hadnt gone over well enough...
Wednesday---Jazz Dance...lovin that class still! Spanish had the test...i think i did alright...but i never know with spanish because there are so many little things to remember...this year is so much writing...i met with my psych prof at 2:30 to discuss a paper because i was assigned a topic that is ridiculously hard to find info on..my great luck i know...so she helped me a bit to try and find stuff...now i have to write it this weekend :(...had a interview for best buddies at 4...worked 4:30-5:30...sig pi meeting 6:00-7:30....came back and finished my ed reading....started practicing sing for our sorority for homecoming and that was from 9:30-10:30...then i went out with the girls for a bit cuz i just needed a break before i went insane....
Today: Child dev, had to go get my stupid tb test checked at the health dpt...what a waste of perfectly good time...ED300...we have a test in there on tuesday...he gave us a chart of the grades people got on it last year...1 person out of all his classes got an A...the outlook is not good...now im in my room taking a breather...in which i should be doing homework but im so tired i just need to rest....i have choir at 4:30..work at 5:30...UNYK at 8 and Yell from 9-11...then me and katie are gunna do our spanish homework together...yay for another late crazy night..
I'm sorry im complaining so much and i have no room to talk because i brought most of this upon myself...but its all stuff i want to be involved in an i enjoy...its almost the idea that school and homework is getting in the way of my fun in the activities i want to do lol...but i know i am here to get an education its just stressing me out trying to keep up with homework and tests with everything else......too many commitments...
In other news i talked to my mom today which was super nice....i miss my family so much...i havent seen them for a month now which granted isnt that long, but it is for me...
We were talking about my sister and she said that my sister told her the other day that she thinks i finally realized what a great sister she is since i went away....i started to cry...shh they dont know...it just hit me...i dont feel like i am being a great sister to her...i never make the time to sit and call her and see whats up...i sent her an email once and have talked to the phone with her once since i have been here...otherwise i just hear everything about my family through my mom....i just miss my sister so much...i hate missing out on her life...missing seeing her in her dressfor dances...helping her with her homework...its weird but she is right...its stuff that i took for granted and kind of blew off when i was home...but now i miss it...and ps i always new what a great sister she was...but it did take my to go away to realize just how much of an impact she has on me...my mom always says she looks up to me...but i think its the other way around...
My mom also told me that my dad went to the dr. today for an mri because his back has been hurting him a lot...i dunno whats up with that...but she also said that he was diagnosed with high cholesterol and had to go on medicine and that he needs to get a colonoscopy cuz he is having some other sorts of problems with that...it just kinda scares me..especially cuz of what i have seen from what Stultz is going through with her dad having a heart attack and all...it can happen to anyone.....i know me and my dad butted heads a lot this summer...and didnt really reconcile all that much before i went away and just hearing all this stuff going makes me realize how important he is...i dont need to be holding on to stupid grudges...its not worth it...i dunno all this stuff just scares me....i feel like a lot of it could have to do with his drinkin habits too....which makes me wish he would stop even more....he is destroying his body...and its finally catching up with him....i just feel like the effects of alllllll these years of drinking probably can't be fixed....
i dunno....
I had two hard tests this week...that i started studying for late at night and then finished studying for in the wee hours of the morning before class...i just can't keep doing this...
I know its my own fault because i get myself in over my head and involved in too many things...but thats just how i am...then i end up going crazy trying to do it all...which is what i am doing now....
Tuesday i had my 8:30 Child Dev class and we had a test....i woke up at 6 to finish studying for it....i wasn't very happy with my performance i dont think....i think the multiple choice i did alright but the essays were kinda difficult for me...they involved all that wacky genetics crap that just confuses me...boo....then i had to go see my spanish teacher to explain something before my spanish test on wed...studied spanish for a bit...went to lunch...ED300 i had a break down...that class is so mentally exhausting...he asked us to figure out a question that i just didnt understand and i was frustrated and everyone was butting heads and trying to explain it and i just started to cry...ridiculous i know....im just so stressed out, tired...and i had that stupid child dev test that morning and a spanish test to study for that night and no time to do it in......it was just not a good moment...everyone at my table just kinda of looked at me and was like its ohk we can do it just take a breath...luckily it was basically just my sorority sisters who knew what i was going through....so that sucked...then i had to work from 2:30-4:30 and i had choir from 4:30-5:30...UNYK at 8 and yell at 9...by the time i got done i was so exahusted...i stayed up till 1:30 trying to get everything memorized for spanish and then got up at 7 to finish what i hadnt gone over well enough...
Wednesday---Jazz Dance...lovin that class still! Spanish had the test...i think i did alright...but i never know with spanish because there are so many little things to remember...this year is so much writing...i met with my psych prof at 2:30 to discuss a paper because i was assigned a topic that is ridiculously hard to find info on..my great luck i know...so she helped me a bit to try and find stuff...now i have to write it this weekend :(...had a interview for best buddies at 4...worked 4:30-5:30...sig pi meeting 6:00-7:30....came back and finished my ed reading....started practicing sing for our sorority for homecoming and that was from 9:30-10:30...then i went out with the girls for a bit cuz i just needed a break before i went insane....
Today: Child dev, had to go get my stupid tb test checked at the health dpt...what a waste of perfectly good time...ED300...we have a test in there on tuesday...he gave us a chart of the grades people got on it last year...1 person out of all his classes got an A...the outlook is not good...now im in my room taking a breather...in which i should be doing homework but im so tired i just need to rest....i have choir at 4:30..work at 5:30...UNYK at 8 and Yell from 9-11...then me and katie are gunna do our spanish homework together...yay for another late crazy night..
I'm sorry im complaining so much and i have no room to talk because i brought most of this upon myself...but its all stuff i want to be involved in an i enjoy...its almost the idea that school and homework is getting in the way of my fun in the activities i want to do lol...but i know i am here to get an education its just stressing me out trying to keep up with homework and tests with everything else......too many commitments...
In other news i talked to my mom today which was super nice....i miss my family so much...i havent seen them for a month now which granted isnt that long, but it is for me...
We were talking about my sister and she said that my sister told her the other day that she thinks i finally realized what a great sister she is since i went away....i started to cry...shh they dont know...it just hit me...i dont feel like i am being a great sister to her...i never make the time to sit and call her and see whats up...i sent her an email once and have talked to the phone with her once since i have been here...otherwise i just hear everything about my family through my mom....i just miss my sister so much...i hate missing out on her life...missing seeing her in her dressfor dances...helping her with her homework...its weird but she is right...its stuff that i took for granted and kind of blew off when i was home...but now i miss it...and ps i always new what a great sister she was...but it did take my to go away to realize just how much of an impact she has on me...my mom always says she looks up to me...but i think its the other way around...
My mom also told me that my dad went to the dr. today for an mri because his back has been hurting him a lot...i dunno whats up with that...but she also said that he was diagnosed with high cholesterol and had to go on medicine and that he needs to get a colonoscopy cuz he is having some other sorts of problems with that...it just kinda scares me..especially cuz of what i have seen from what Stultz is going through with her dad having a heart attack and all...it can happen to anyone.....i know me and my dad butted heads a lot this summer...and didnt really reconcile all that much before i went away and just hearing all this stuff going makes me realize how important he is...i dont need to be holding on to stupid grudges...its not worth it...i dunno all this stuff just scares me....i feel like a lot of it could have to do with his drinkin habits too....which makes me wish he would stop even more....he is destroying his body...and its finally catching up with him....i just feel like the effects of alllllll these years of drinking probably can't be fixed....
i dunno....