i wonder...
i finally realized that..
love isnt about being good enough for someone, its not about the difference in your ages, its about the way you feel when your with them.
with all the opportunties i've had i still want more..
with everyday that goes by i miss him more and more..
what if i ran away from my problems? would they follow me?
what if i took a risk..does that mean he would too?
...all of these questions yet no answers. im just searching for some truth. i've heard the lies and i dont want to deal with them anymore. Why do all guys have to test how much you like them? the more your a jerk the more you push me away. Why is it so hard for him to believe i only want him. Even though i know i cant have him. Not because hes taken but because im not ready to have a relationship. Girls wanna rush to have a boyfriend but you know what, its really not all that its cracked up to be. So far most of my friends just have stressful relationships, i just want a guy i can have fun with. I fight with my mom and my sister lol i want a guy that i can take to go play paintball or football or something fun. Hockey games..anything. I've always been to scared to take a risk, well i think im ready. I think im going to move out to my dads..finish out this year then for senior year move out. I know to you it probably doesnt make any sense but look at it from my view. My mom just got remarried and i really need to be with my dad right now. Not because he needs me but because i need him. I'm just going to take it day by day because i know things change, hopefully these changes will be for the better. I love all of my friends, i love my family, and i love my life but i just need a change. Figure out more of who i am. Of course im Brittany and im really nice to everyone but i really want to pursue with my music and see what happens..theres more out there and i want to see it all! :) any one wanna join? lol hopefully this year i can plan a few road trips;) im thinkin chicago..or new york? lets do it! make the time we all have together worth while! :) i love you all no matter where i am! xoxo let me know what u think..
Brittany*