You broke into my soul...
I've contemplated my life a lot here lately. Is it where I want it to be? No. Is it where it should be with God's plan; sure. Or so I believe. I finally feel as if my life is falling into place and I can now see that obstacles were set in front of me to overcome before I could achieve the dream in my life. And they were put there for a reason; they've made me such a better person. I'm not saying they were easy; because by all means they weren't. I'm sick of looking for love and getting my heart broken; plain and simple it just sucks. I thought Danny was different; and he sure fooled me. He is skilled in his wording and his charm; and I fell for it. He's an amazing man, and as a friend I would honestly do anything to help him. But the whole "relationship" deal isn't working. He wants to be with me and other girls but I can't see other men, and I myself; am not getting into a controllive relationship like that. For as far back as I can remember I wanted to join the Air Force. It's been my dream, my goal, my everything. Almost 2 years ago; after I graduated high school (yes 2 years; although it seems like 10) I was going to join the Air Force and mom said no; try college first. So what did I do; I tried the whole VA Western thing and I hated it, so I quit. And at that moment I should have joined the Air Force; but my point is this. God has put many obstacles in my life whether it be meeting a new friend or a new boyfriend, starting college, someone close to me dying, getting cancer or something of that nature because it just wasn't my time to join. So the past couple of months I've been talking to a Navy recruiter and he actually hooked me up with a personal trainer. So now that I have the trainer; I can now continue on with my dream. I'm so excited that at this point in my life; I have finally focused on my future and that it's all falling into place. It's hard for me to believe in just a few amount of months I'll be off to Great Lakes for boot camp. But I honestly can't wait for this next chapter in my life to begin. I'm going to miss everyone but I'll be back. I put love aside, my friends aside, my family aside to follow my own dreams; because for so long MY DREAMS were put aside for others. Or to help others or for anything other than myself. I've always put others before me; and now its time to finally put me before everyone else. Sounds selfish I know; but this is my future and it's not going anywhere sitting in Roanoke, Virginia. I plan to join the Navy, get a 4 year degree (not sure what my major will be yet), go to Officer Training School; get my title for that and then become a Pilot. I have such high expectations; yes. But I know that I can do this! My life has been seriously crazy in the past couple of months; and finally its slowing down. I got my results back from the doctor to see if the cancer had came back or spread; and its not come back and it hasn't spread to anywhere else in my body! So now I'm in remission and enjoying every second of it! Life can only get better!