(no subject)
yeah, i've also come to the conclusion that no one reads this anymore, but that could very possibly be a good thing.
so here's what i need to vent about right now.
it's pretty much the same shit i go on and off with every couple of months. I end up becoming "friends" with the ex-boyfriend again and everything is cool. It's nice to be able to run into the kid at parties and not: a) be surprised and pissed off or: b) get talked shit to the whole time. So I make friends with him to make the situation easier on everyone. Is that a crime? Is it a crime to hang out with someone that you had feelings for and dated on and off for a year? In my opinion, I need the kid around. He changed a lot of things about me and gave me a lot of insight into who I am, what I want, and who I want to be. Just because he treated me like shit.... Well, I'm still a Christian and I believe in forgiveness. Sue me.
But everything ends up starting back from square one and once again i get torn between friends. I always have to choose because no one gets along. But of course being the person I am, I have this tendency to try and make everyone happy, so I tell everyone that we can hang out later, when, in reality, when it comes down to it, I'm going to have to choose one or the other. I know what I should be choosing, but it can be tough when you still have strong feelings for someone, whether you like it or not.
Then comes the home situation. My mom is a cheating wench. That's all there is to it. I could honestly give two shits what she does with her life, but it's literally kiling my dad. I mean, to be honest, he doesn't look too good. He's so stressed about getting a divorce... Breaking up the family, who the hell my mom was messing around with... It's making him crazy. So who do you think he turns to? The only sane adult in the house (or close enough), me. So I get at least 8 phone calls from my dad every day asking me to talk to my mom, or try to figure out what's going on... And last time i checked, it's not my problem. I love my dad, but he NEEDS to let go before he gives himself a heart attack. I'm sure we can find him a cute, young girlfriend cuz he's the sweetest, down to earth motherFer I know. Any lady is lucky to have him. Too bad my mom couldn't see that. Well, sucks to be her.
I wonder when it's going to hit her. When she's living off of macaroni and cheese in some shitty ass apartment in detroit because she's broke as hell... maybe then she might realize what she's losing. She's not going to get custody of my little sisters, a cheating alcoholic doesn't have much of a chance there, whether she's the mother or not. My little sisters don't want anything to do with her anyways.
I'm just sick of being the bearer of everyone else's burdens. I have enough of my own. Between work, getting my shit together for my state board so i can get my liscence, trying to save money so I can move out.........
as young jeezy says.. "minus the bullshit, life's great."
xoxo
so here's what i need to vent about right now.
it's pretty much the same shit i go on and off with every couple of months. I end up becoming "friends" with the ex-boyfriend again and everything is cool. It's nice to be able to run into the kid at parties and not: a) be surprised and pissed off or: b) get talked shit to the whole time. So I make friends with him to make the situation easier on everyone. Is that a crime? Is it a crime to hang out with someone that you had feelings for and dated on and off for a year? In my opinion, I need the kid around. He changed a lot of things about me and gave me a lot of insight into who I am, what I want, and who I want to be. Just because he treated me like shit.... Well, I'm still a Christian and I believe in forgiveness. Sue me.
But everything ends up starting back from square one and once again i get torn between friends. I always have to choose because no one gets along. But of course being the person I am, I have this tendency to try and make everyone happy, so I tell everyone that we can hang out later, when, in reality, when it comes down to it, I'm going to have to choose one or the other. I know what I should be choosing, but it can be tough when you still have strong feelings for someone, whether you like it or not.
Then comes the home situation. My mom is a cheating wench. That's all there is to it. I could honestly give two shits what she does with her life, but it's literally kiling my dad. I mean, to be honest, he doesn't look too good. He's so stressed about getting a divorce... Breaking up the family, who the hell my mom was messing around with... It's making him crazy. So who do you think he turns to? The only sane adult in the house (or close enough), me. So I get at least 8 phone calls from my dad every day asking me to talk to my mom, or try to figure out what's going on... And last time i checked, it's not my problem. I love my dad, but he NEEDS to let go before he gives himself a heart attack. I'm sure we can find him a cute, young girlfriend cuz he's the sweetest, down to earth motherFer I know. Any lady is lucky to have him. Too bad my mom couldn't see that. Well, sucks to be her.
I wonder when it's going to hit her. When she's living off of macaroni and cheese in some shitty ass apartment in detroit because she's broke as hell... maybe then she might realize what she's losing. She's not going to get custody of my little sisters, a cheating alcoholic doesn't have much of a chance there, whether she's the mother or not. My little sisters don't want anything to do with her anyways.
I'm just sick of being the bearer of everyone else's burdens. I have enough of my own. Between work, getting my shit together for my state board so i can get my liscence, trying to save money so I can move out.........
as young jeezy says.. "minus the bullshit, life's great."
xoxo