(no subject)

[lilblndangelpnk]

its weird how things work out. i mean just a few months ago i was with kevin....and i thought i couldn't be happier. then that all changed when i found out he messed around with this 15 year old girl from NH. and to make it worse i found out that he never truly had relationship feelings for me. this of course really hurt.you would think i would be used to such pain, but it still hurts. i can never manage to find a guy that won't hurt me.....i just feel so alone lately and i don't know what to do.

i have been hanging out with ben lately. i don't necessarily know if that is completely a good thing or not i still love him, always will. and i know he loves me....which makes it harder since he is with amanda. i mean what am i supposed to do...continue being the other girl?? no!too much pain and complications come with such a title. i want to be someones girlfriend, their one and only. i feel like that dream is slipping further and further away.

i have been spending a lot of time emailing nathan on myspace. he is really nice to talk to and i feel comfortable around him. i don't honestly know if this is a relationship in the making or just really good friends. who knows....but i still like keith. i don't know why. i also still like logan and feelings have developed for yet another freshmen. i guess i am just looking for love in all the wrong places.....i just need a prince charming :(